The Dangers of Obsession
by bringonthespam
Summary: Twilight's infatuation with her mentor, Princess Celestia, has spiked in recent years, and Spike has taken it upon himself to make sure that Twilight doesn't do anything she, or any other pony, will regret. Some OOC Twilight and Spike. "M" to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

A/N - Hey there everyone! This is my first attempt at a published story for MLP:FiM. I've done a bit of writing before, but haven't uploaded anything yet, or at least not in a long time. I don't know whether to call this crack or simply a little random. We have a fairly OOC Twilight, nursing an unhealthy obsession with Princess Celestia, while Spike, the "hero" of our little story, does everything in his power to keep Twilight from all but molesting her, much to her anger. Not completely sure where this is going yet, but I've got an idea of what to do. Anyway, onto the preface!

- My Ravishing Beauty Celestia -

Does anybody ever tell you how gorgeous you are? Oh, of course they do, how could they not? I'm sure everywhere you go you have ponies telling you this. That firm, white body and coat of fur! Those svelte legs that stretch for miles! That regal, swan-like neck! Those pink, almost ruby, eyes! That billowy, luscious mane and tail! Those rounded, delicious flanks... Whoa, lost my concentration there for a sec...I swear Princess Celestia, if I weren't your student, and you weren't my mentor, I would have swept you off of your hooves and made sweet, passionate love to every last inch of you a long time ago!

I cannot express just how deeply I desire you! I really can't, somepony would catch onto it and I'd be put in another one of those ghastly holding cells, just like the last time... Anyway, enough about the past. I'm sure you've probably had your fill of me rambling on about the past. Let's talk about the present, or even more importantly, our future... It's too bad that I have to keep these little notes a secret from everypony. Spike found one of them, and we all know how that turned out... I do care about Spike, even love him like a brother, but it is simply not right how he continues to keep me away from you, as I know how much you long for me to return to Canterlot once again, so that you might embrace me with your majestic wings, look deep into my eyes and tell me, "never again will I let you go..." before leading me over to your soft, comfortable bed where we make up for all of that lost time and our pent up urges...Ahhhhh...Oh, darn, I spaced out again didn't I? I've gotta stop doing that. Spike's down there still, cleaning up the library. Wouldn't want to get too distracted and have him spoil the only time I get to confess my true feelings for my one and only alicorn.

I can feel your love even from this remote area of Equestria. I know how much you miss me, and don't you worry your pretty head, because Twilight Sparkle is here to satisfy... In the other letter I sent to you, the one that I used as a decoy because Spike has that awful habit of proofreading everything I send to you now, I have invited you to the library in Ponyville to discuss some of my latest findings in the field of Chemistry...that is...the chemistry that you and I share (wink wink). Of course, Spike is none the wiser, and he thinks it is a legitimate reason. Poor Spike, just doesn't know when to not interfere with the power of our love, am I right?

I'll be waiting for you, my princess... When you get here, I will give you a presentation you'll never forget...(XOXOXO)

Your Longing and Eternally Admiring Student,  
>Twilight Sparkle<p>

Twilight sighed as she looked her letter over for spelling mistakes and typographical errors, all the while fantasizing about how her eventual reunion with Celestia would pan out. It was something she did with all of her letters, whether she sent them or not. Of course, this one would be tucked in a small corner of the bedroom, away from prying eyes, along with all of the other "secret" letters she had been writing to the princess. No one could find out about it, especially not Spike.

She thought of the few times Spike had discovered one or more of the letters stashed away, especially in the last days they had been in Canterlot. Twilight imagined that there was a possible connection between him finding out about her secret and her getting sent all the way to Ponyville to live, away from her one true love, where she wouldn't be able to get to her.

Twilight felt a tinge of frustration. Spike was typically a good dragon assistant, but Spike hid many of his own secrets from her that he thought she wouldn't find out about. One of those secrets, Twilight learned all too late, was how extremely well developed the dragon mind became within a few short years of life. Their brains were like industrial strength sponges, taking in and retaining the most minute traces of information imaginable. Even though Spike was a baby dragon, and usually acted like a young male would, she could now see that it was a deception on his part. If her calculations were correct, at this stage of his development, he should have the mental capacity of a similarly aged pony to Twilight, maybe even higher than that. It was a little scary, especially when Spike would put on his facade, acting like a ridiculous lunatic at Pinkie Pie's parties, purporting ignorance at many subjects she would study, and even purposefully misspelling words to look even more incompetent. Also even scarier, Spike's "harmless" little boy crush on Rarity wasn't that innocent after all. His hormones and understanding of anatomy, reproduction, and both romantic and sexual love made these otherwise benign feelings into something more akin to lust and infatuation. Twilight almost felt sorry for him, as Rarity was not well versed in dragon development, and treated Spike like he was just another little kid, as if he were Sweetie Belle or her friends. Must've been pretty bad for the little guy.

Who knows, when he's over a thousand years old, he'll be like a god or something...

Unfortunately, this has resulted in many times where Spike would interfere in her finally giving Celestia what she knows she wants, and what she wants...obviously...is Twilight, ready, willing, and reporting for duty, as it were. Twilight rationalized that Celestia had made her her star pupil, not only for her talent in magic, but in her suitability as a possible romantic partner. The logically minded Twilight was not so much on this issue, because she can't really explain why this is, oh, but she knows alright. Twilight simply must have been hoof-crafted by the sun goddess herself, and was put on this planet to fulfill Celestia's every wish and fantasy, oh and Twilight would do so, with earnest.

"What am I doing," Twilight shook her head, the thoughts having clouded it for some time now, "if Spike sees me space out like this, he's going to get suspicious again! Can't be having that now, can we?"

Twilight decided that a cold shower was in order, as her lustful daydreams of servicing her princess in the most lewd ways possible continued to bombard her.

"Well, I won't be able to go down into the library if I'm sweating and panting uncontrollably. That will have to wait until the dragon's asleep..."

A/N - Pretty short, but I didn't really want to go all out with it yet. Hope it has been enjoyed so far!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N - Hello again, this chapter is really just laying the groundwork for the rest of the story, which will be put in the present day, a few days (specifics will be worked out later) before Twilight's eventual reunion with Celestia for her faux presentation on Chemistry. Enjoy!

A single green eye poked into the doorway after being sure that Twilight had left for her bathroom to, no doubt, take another one of her famous cold showers. Spike had been subjected to one of those before. Let's call it a sort of punishment for sneaking in on one of her private writing sessions, a mistake he would not soon repeat if he could help it.

Spike trembled in nervousness as he recounted the few things he heard Twilight muse on before she left. The "private" letters to Celestia were being written more frequently, with more content, and Twilight, in her not so careful state, would start to reread what she had just wrote, and Spike did not like the sound of it.

"Oh no...why now of all times? Didn't she just do this sort of thing about a year ago?"

Spike remembered back to that horrible, frightening six months before their move to Ponyville. It was ironic how peaceful and calm the day's weather was. Little did anypony know of the absolute shitstorm that would rage through the Canterlot palace that night...

Twilight had been acting in a very similar way as she had been as of late. She would jump imperceptibly whenever Celestia's name was mentioned in casual conversation. There were many instances where she wouldn't pick up a book all day, and instead be sitting around, Celestia running through her mind instead of a new theory she needed to do a presentation on the next day, often resulting in a frantic, all night study and thesis proposing mess that left both her and Spike exhausted, and almost late for class the next day. This is also when the letters started. They were small, not very detailed, and fairly innocent at first, but over time degraded into something that even Spike with his comparatively more matured bearings wouldn't bring himself to read for fear of having to rinse his eyeballs out in the sink.

"Twilight, what's going on, why did you bring me up here?" Spike reminisced on a vivid memory.

Twilight was just staring at Spike with a large grin on her face, one that if Spike wasn't more observant would've seemed a tad deranged.

"Oh, I just wanted to send a letter to Princess Celestia..." Twilight coyly replied to the little dragon, "I took the liberty of penning it myself, you know, to make it more...personal..."

Spike grasped the parchment out of Twilight's magic aura, still shook up from her impossibly huge smile. He dreaded the contents of the message, already well clued in on the inner workings of Twilight's heavy obsession for their princess.

Spike read on -

- Dear Princess Celestia -

I am pleased to inform you that I have made great progress in my research on my current topic of study, pony mating rituals...

Spike froze for a moment, bewildered by what he had just read, out loud nonetheless. It filled him with a sense of complete dread that now was the time to tell Twilight that what she was doing was not only wrong, but could possibly have extreme consequences. To not seem too suspicious, Spike kept on with the letter -

I have tried to set up an appropriate meeting place for us to discuss these findings, but my request has been rejected by five different teachers to use their labs for this. I wonder what's so wrong with this request... As an alternative, I would like to suggest meeting later tonight in your chambers. I would get a proper room for this if I could, but what can I do with no other options? I will provide the materials necessary, so don't worry about any sort of preparation. Thank you very much, Princess Celestia

Your Enthusiastic Student,  
>Twilight Sparkle<p>

Spike looked back up at Twilight again, who was looking a little red around the face. Was it because of her plastered on smile that still unnerved Spike to no end, or could it possibly be nervousness?

"Twilight..." Spike started, taking a deep breath, trying to work up the courage to face down someone he could easily call his big sister, but could also call a cruel taskmistress when she was upset.

"I know, isn't it a great idea?" Twilight suddenly spit out in a squealing rush. She stamped on the ground with her front hooves excitedly. Her grin lessened, and soon became a confused frown when she saw the look of stern terror on Spike's face.

"Twilight...you haven't even picked up a book in the last two days, much less have been able to make any kind of presentation to the princess."

Twilight was taken aback by the accusation present in Spike's voice. What was his problem anyway? It wasn't like she hadn't studied up on this topic well beforehand, albeit not in any of the sources found on the Canterlot Library bookshelves...

"Oh, I'm good and ready Spike. I have been for a long, long time!"

Twilight trotted slowly but menacingly toward Spike, her grin turning into a teeth-grinding glare, if one squinted hard enough.

"Tell me...are you still writing those "other" letters to the princess lately? You know, the ones you never send?..."

Twilight eased up long enough to gasp out loud. She pouted indignantly at her dragon assistant.

"Spiiike, how dare you nose in on my private time! Nopony was supposed to know about those letters!"

"Well, that answers that question." Spike thought to himself, not daring to say it out loud.

"Twilight...is everything okay...I mean, you haven't been eating, you haven't been sleeping, and you definitely haven't been working much." Spike was getting more scared by the second, he could tell that Twilight was not pleased with all of the questions being thrown her way.

"Of course everything's okay! I'm just...trying to get a lot of things done at once and getting burnt out, yeah, that's what it is!"

Twilight tried to fake her innocence once again with a, hopefully, more genuine looking smile. It soon cracked and broke when Spike pulled something out of his front pocket (in his abdominal region...a little creepy...).

"I found this on the table one day when you went out."

Spike put the pieces of paper on the same table, displaying them in a way that made the contents obvious. One paper was scribbled with the unending mantra, "I (heart) Princess Celestia". One picture on another sheet was that of a crudely drawn interpretation of Twilight and Celestia, sharing a heated, passionate tongue kiss, complete with the "mmms" and "aahs" of moaning. Spike looked at the last one he had found and immediately shut his eyes and turned away from the drawing as if it were infected. He threw it down on the little metal table disgustedly. Let's just say Twilight, for being a virgin, had an imagination that would put many seedy romance novelists in a corner, crying their eyes out to their mothers.

Twilight sat there with a duped look on her face. She didn't even realize she had left them out that day. All she wanted to do was go shopping for a few hours, and the drawings were so rough and she had plenty of other, better works of her and her princess that she didn't pay them much attention.

"Uh...um...oops?..." Twilight was at a loss for words. How could she have been so careless about this? As much as she wanted to shout her love for Celestia from the highest tower in Canterlot, she realized after the few other times she had made it too obvious and gotten in trouble for trying to break into places she didn't belong and making experimental drugs and sedatives to...intensify their love making sessions...that secrecy would be required in everything she did and made for her one true love.

"I'm only scratching the surface here Twilight..." That was all Spike got out before he turned to one of the less used bookshelves in the library. It was pretty dusty, they never needed any books from that particular shelf. They were all fiction, so between Twilight only wanting to read non-fiction and instructional materials, and Spike's not so great love of books, especially after having to catalog, categorize, and sort them every day of his young life, this particular shelf never saw action. It was the perfect hiding spot...

"What are you getting at here Spike?" Twilight fretted as Spike got nearer to..."it"...

"How do you explain...THIS?"

As he almost shouted the last word, he put his hand into a secret compartment with a switch, not unlike a light switch, behind the shelf. It was quite well hidden, and any other pony would have found it impossible to reach behind. Twilight could hit it with her magic, but since no one else knew, she thought she was safe. Pity she didn't account for the crafty little dragon whose part time job was sneaking around, pranking and getting into things no one else could.

As the switch was flipped, the lights behind the bookcase zoomed to life. Spike pulled his hand out as fast as he could, as the bookshelf rotated in place, pressed into the hollow room behind it, and split in half like a double door, revealing something that made Spike just as shamefaced as it did Twilight.

Inside was an ornate, some could say over the top, shrine dedicated to Princess Celestia. The centerpiece was a large, lifelike painting of the ruler herself in a relaxed yet regal pose, befitting of royalty. Many trinkets, mostly objects the princess had either used, touched, or even gifted to the purple unicorn, were lined up in neat, orderly rows, demonstrating the extremes of Twilight's obsessive compulsive streaks. A large maple wood chest with golden knobs was sitting in the right corner, almost like a filing cabinet. In fact, it WAS a filing cabinet, filled to the brim with all of the letters sent to Celestia by Twilight, letters from the princess, and even letters from the princess that weren't even for the unicorn, but she had taken them anyway, in a fit of kleptomania. Anything pertaining to the ruler of Equestria could be found within, even the extremely explicit art and stories Twilight wrote or drew about the two of them.

"Hmm?" Spike hummed one last time to prove his point once and for all. She couldn't possibly avoid accountability for these actions now that it was all out in the open, for anypony to see. Spike was visibly shaking now, knowing what was about to happen next. He had just exposed everything she felt and thought about the princess. There was going to be a bloodbath...

Twilight's eye twitched horribly, her glare and gritted teeth returning to her face.

"SO I LIKE PRINCESS CELESTIA, BIG DEAL! I'M NOT HURTING ANYPONY BY IT! I bet the princess would be flattered to know that she's cared for so much!"

"More like frightened out of her mind!" Spike stammered back, seeing the true fixation finally take hold of the purple pony in front of him, "Twilight, you can't go through with that meeting you have planned for tonight! I know what you're trying to do, and if you get caught you're going to be punished! You need to take a huge breather and get some counseling or something! This really isn't healthy! Don't throw away your friendship with the princess for this!"

Twilight wasn't going to hear any of this any longer. She would have Celestia, whether anypony liked it or not.

"We were meant to be together! She'll realize that eventually, even if it takes weeks, months, years of me demonstrating it to her! You'll see, Spike! I'm her prized student, and I think that speaks for itself!"

"You and every other student that's walked through that door for hundreds of years..." Spike let slip ignoring the fact that an unstable, possibly psychopathic Twilight was being aggravated by the second due to Spike's little quips.

"...You will send that letter to the princess...and you will not scribble anything on there trying to deter the princess from meeting me tonight...!"

Spike's eyes were leaking small tears of pure fear, wide as saucers. He didn't realize that Twilight could get any more frightful than she already was at this moment, but the look in her own eyes was boring straight into Spike's being, breaking it from the inside out.

"No..." Spike replied back in as dignified a way as a squirming pile of mush could.

"I said do it!"

"No Twilight, I won't help you hurt the princess!"

"NOW!"

Spike didn't feel like he had much of a choice now. It was either stick with his principles and become a green and purple smudge in the library floor, or live to fight another day and possibly contribute to the pain and suffering everypony would soon be subjected to.

"Sigh..." Spike huffed a little before making his decision. He took in a deep breath, preparing for the transfer to Celestia's chambers. All of a sudden, he puffed out a large green flame. As the flame melted away the parchment, Twilight looked on in a crazed glee, having bent Spike to her will, and soon the princess would know of their deep compatibility, at least that's what she thought in her own mind.

Soon though, her glee turned to rage as the letter fell into a pile of ashes at the feet of the baby dragon. Spike looked on, both at the ashes and Twilight. A victorious relief flashed in his eyes and smile as his last ditch effort to wipe the letter from existence paid off.

If not for the close personal bond Twilight shared with her precious dragon assistant, she would have ended him right then and there. There were no curses or tortures strong enough to express her anger. She felt like she could just explode into a huge ball of fire and smoke. She wasn't far off as her mane and tail started to singe with the familiar fiery heat that erupted when she was extremely pissed off. She did everything she could to quell it though. It would be conspicuous if the entire library just caught on fire and exploded, and there would be only one, maybe two, ponies or dragons to blame for it. Spike couldn't make that much fire yet, so the blame would fall to her.

She finally calmed enough to be in the sourest mood she ever had been in before. She turned away from Spike with a haughty, indignant flare, reminiscent of Rarity in one of her spells.

"Enough! It is time to clean the library today!"

Spike was both relieved that she didn't barbeque him, and a little sad that his big sister/mentor was giving him such a cold shoulder. He experimentally made an observation.

"But...uh...I thought we already picked up all of the books and dusted the shelves..."

Just then, a magic aura was thrown around the entire room. Books from every shelf, surprisingly even the one that held the "shrine", were slammed to the ground roughly. Hardcover books nearly broke in half from the force, and most of the books were put on the ground in awkward ways, half-opened, pages bent. A huge cloud of dusty smoke also tore through the library with the help of Twilight's magic. It sprayed into the deepest, hardest to reach corners. Water was mixed in just enough that some of the shelves became slightly caked in a dusty mud that would take hours to clean.

"Not anymore... Now get to it, my NUMBER...ONE...ASSISTANT!" Twilight spoke every word with a venom unseen, but deeply felt, like a ninja. Spike recoiled with each unfeeling phrase.

Twilight trotted out of the room with a sorrowful but still angry zest and slammed the door behind her.

"So..." Spike said to himself when the room was once again occupied only by him, "...does this mean I get off easy?..."

Going all the way forward to the present, Spike was at the slightly opened door to Twilight's room in the tree house library, and she was still none the wiser to Spike's presence.

With a lot of inward reluctance, he recounted that very same night that contributed to Twilight being sent to Ponyville to live six months later...

"Ergh...oomph..."

Spike was tossing and turning in his sleep that night, or at least what was left of it after taking all day and much of the night to clean the library from top to bottom. In many ways, Spike felt like he had gotten off rather well with Twilight. He was expecting the powerful mage to at least spank or slap him, if not completely decimate him. For that, he was thankful. Though, he was also exhausted from his labor, a punishment for burning the scroll she would send to the princess to the ground.

"Erm...Twilight...is somebody there?..."

Spike questioned in a dreaming daze, having heard the wind rustling from a creaking, slightly open window. He continued tossing in his bed for a second before sitting still as a statue.

"Twilight...are you there?"

Once again, all Spike could hear was the silent whistling of wind and rattling of the window. He slowly started to wake up and come back to reality. He started becoming aware that something was terribly wrong.

"Twilight...hello! Wake up!"

Once again, an eerie silence... Spike got up out of his bed basket and ran over to Twilight's much larger bed. The blankets, the sheets, and the pillows hadn't even been touched, as if nopony were ever there.

"Oh...no...OH NO! NO, TWI, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?"

Spike was fully awake by now, clutching the blanket and sheet of her bed in his shaking claws. He knew exactly where she had gone, to the place she intended to go in the letter he destroyed.

"I've gotta warn the guards! They'll be able to help me! Oh, Princess Celestia, Twilight, I hope I'm not too late!"

Spike scrambled down the staircases clumsily in a hurried fervor. He had to find somepony, anypony to help him!

There was a hollow, ghostly creak in the moonlit bed chamber as the door was pushed open ever so gently. The pony in question poked her muzzle around the room, searching for any possible places the guards might be waiting to strike an intruder. Gratefully, she found nothing, and released a held breath in her mind. She tried the door again to get fully in, and it creaked a little more this time, but not so much that anypony could hear it.

She shuffled in on her hooves, trying to make as little clopping noise as possible. She didn't realize how much noise she made while walking until she had entered. It felt like even her heartbeat would bound out too loud and wake the entire castle. It was about ready to burst too, as she gazed upon the mountainous bed of her beloved, the one she would soon claim as her own tonight.

"Calm down, Twilight," she chided herself, "What are you so nervous about? This is what Celestia wants right? Now give it to her!"

Twilight strengthened her resolve with that little pep talk. She slid over closer to the side of the large, silk bed, gulping what seemed like every five seconds as a tense heat started to envelop her entire body. For the walls being so stony and bare, and the wind chill from outside, Twilight was getting really hot.

There she was, the mare of her deepest, darkest fantasies, right there in front of her, completely vulnerable in her sleep. Her face was so calm, so soft, as it always was. Even her breathing in her sleep was graceful, as she would inaudibly puff and inhale every few minutes or so. She was everything Twilight could have ever dreamed and hoped for on the night she finally consumated the feelings between them... She was perfect...

Twilight shifted over to the other side of her bed, just as quietly and unobtrusively, as not to disturb her sleeping Celestia. She made her way into the heavenly bed, feeling rather groggy while doing so...but she couldn't fall asleep! Not with the plans she had for both of them that night. With all of the hard studying she had done to have the princess moaning and writhing under her ministrations, she had come too far for that.

Twilight paused a moment to regain her bearings on the situation. With a flushed face and trembling hooves, she leaned over and gave her princess an experimental lick on her ear. Princess Celestia tasted fantastic! Twilight could already feel the rush of heat in her entire body intensify to a whole other level. Celestia's ear flicked a little bit.

"HOW ADORABLE WAS THAT?" Twilight thought. Otherwise, Celestia groaned a tiny bit in her sleep and shifted a little. She must not have completely registered the act of something wet crawling on her.

Twilight, in a lust-filled frenzy, started giving Celestia kisses on her face and neck to try to wake her up. With a few nervous jerks and spasms in her white coat, Celestia slowly drifted out of whatever dream she was in. She had been up most of the night herself, attending to royal matters, and wasn't exactly ready for the sight she awoke to in her bed.

"Um...is that...my faithful student, Twilight Sparkle?..."

"Oh, good, you're awake now!" Twilight sat up in the bed and leaned over the half-asleep form of the sun princess.

"Ugh...Twilight...what are you doing in here at this hour?..." Celestia still didn't completely register what was going on. It was almost as if she hadn't even woken up, but was part of some crazy dream.

"Oh Princess Celestia, as coy as ever, aren't we?" Twilight breathed heavily into the princess' ear.

Celestia was taken aback a little before her student asked yet another question.

"So tell me, Princess, you like me, don't you?"

Celestia was confused, of course she didn't hate one of her favorite pupils.

"Yes, of course I like you Twilight. You are a good student, and I think you are a wonderful young mare."

Twilight shook her head slightly.

"No, no, Princess Celestia, I mean...do you...like me...like me?..."

"I...don't know if I know what you're talking about Twilight..."

Twilight was getting a little frustrated by the situation. On one hoof, she wanted to hear it from Celestia herself that she wanted Twilight to ravage her completely. On the other, she was getting really wet and hot in certain places...

"It's alright Princess, I know you do...and I'm going to make sure we are never separated from each other ever again..."

Twilight leaned in once again to capture the princess' lips in a kiss that Twilight was hoping would completely rock her world.

They were mere centimeters from each other when...

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

"Cough cough...there she is!" Spike yelled.

"GET HER!" The guard captain ordered to his soldiers.

Twilight and Celestia both sat in the bed staring at the doorway where the door was ripped off of its hinges. The guards were quickly and efficiently encircling the large bed. One of them had a net, used to trap wild creatures in. There must have been at least five guards there. Once they heard from Spike about Princess Celestia being in danger and having possibly been raped (or at least violated by her), they sprung into action and followed the little dragon all the way there. His claim seemed to be right on the mark with how Twilight was straddling the princess, almost grinding her hips into her with some kind of raw, animalistic passion.

"OH NO YOU DON'T!" Twilight flew off of Celestia and sprinted toward the door. Spike tried to get in her way, but when he noticed that she wasn't stopping for anypony, he decided to let her go, as she would be unable to harm the princess if she wasn't in the same room anyway. That, and he didn't want to be a pancake.

Twilight took off down the halls. Luckily, it was late night by now, so there would be nopony to slam into while she dashed for her very life. Unfortunately, Twilight was turning over misplaced waiting carts in the halls as well, pretty much waking anypony within the castle premises. The guards gave chase with a speed to match, but had to hurdle over or shove the carts, overturned or not, out of their ways.

Twilight came to one of the meeting halls that was surprisingly occupied by a number of domestic and foreign dignitaries. They all gawked at her in surprise and slight fear when she gave them an insane grimace. When she was inside the hall, she used her magic to shut the double doors and bar them, keeping the guards outside from getting in. The guards ran into the doors, knocking on them violently.

"Ok, I think it's safe here," Twilight thought, having completely cracked, "I'll just use one of you as a hostage in case they do break the door down!"

The lords and ladies inside gasped and spoke between each other in a panic. What was this crazy unicorn on?

Eventually, the guards took note that they weren't getting anywhere this way. A battering ram was ordered by the guard captain.

"By Celestia, we'll break that door down if we have to!"

It was a risky move, both financially and for security reasons, but desperate times call for desperate measures, and now was not the time to be indecisive.

"READY?" the guard captain ordered his men, bringing the battering ram up to strike.

"ONE!" "BAAAAAM" "TWO!" "BAAAAAM"

"Oh no, here they come," Twilight thought in a panic, she looked around the hall for some kind of weapon to use for hostage holding purposes. She realized that there must have been some sort of dinner party here, and knives were in abundant supply.

"PERFECT!"

"FOUR!" "BAAAAAM "FIVE!" "BAAACRK"

"Just a little more..." the guard captain mused. Who knew what that unicorn was doing to those poor patrons inside.

"Come and get me!" Twilight thought as she held one of the ponies down with her magic and levitated the knife to his throat.

"CRRRRACK!"

The door finally gave way with a mighty, oak-splitting screech. When the dust finally settled, the guard ponies stormed in to apprehend the mare. They stopped just short when they noticed the position Twilight had one of the lords in.

"Alright, nopony moves, nopony gets hurt. Don't try to be a hero now!"

"Please don't hurt me," the lord pleaded, "I have a huge pile of money to swim in at home!"

"Quiet down you!"

The guard captain sat just outside the door, hiding from the scene to discretely radio one of the other guards.

"We need a specialist in here, right away!"

A few minutes later, their specialist had arrived.

"We must use her obsession as her Achilles heel! This Princess Celestia doll," he pulled out of his saddlebag with his teeth, "just went on the market not too long ago. She won't be able to resist it!"

The specialist threw the plush Celestia doll into the crowd of hostages, hitting Twilight Sparkle in the head with it. It fell with a pointed and resounding thud right in front of her.

"(Gasp)...A CELESTIA DOLL?"

Twilight quickly lost her grip on both the knife and her hostage as she tackled the toy like a professional wrestler. This became a ripe opportunity to detain the renegade unicorn, the guard with the net wrapped her up quickly, while she thrashed about, trying to get free. It took all five of the guard ponies to eventually subdue and drag her down into a holding cell.

"Let me go! I love you so much, Princess Celestia! We'll be together eventually, I promise!"

With that she was escorted unwillingly to her new home, for the time being.

Twilight finally came to when a splash of cold water flew into her face. She spit out some of it, choking slightly.

"So you're finally awake..." one of the royal guards who splashed her said with a hint of humor in his voice.

Twilight stretched and yawned a little, feeling somewhat relaxed and less wound up.

"What happened last night?" was the only thing she could get out before she yawned yet again.

"You went kind'a crazy there for a while. We've told your little dragon friend to come down when you woke, so that he can speak with you personally. I'll just be out here if you need me, but he should be in really soon."

The guard took his leave of the dungeon.

Twilight looked around for a moment before she started wondering again how she could've possibly gotten into this situation in the first place. Bits and pieces of the night before started playing through her mind and felt like they were taunting her for her rash behavior.

"Ohhh," Twilight groaned as she put her hooves to her face in embarrassment. She had really screwed up this time. She wouldn't be surprised if Spike, Princess Celestia, or the rest of Canterlot didn't want to see her ever again. Did she normally lose her cool like this all of the time? She could hardly remember being able to control herself at all.

Her musings were cut short by a door squealing open and a familiar voice cutting into the cell.

"Uh, Twilight, you're in there right?"

"(Sigh)...yes Spike, I'm here...unfortunately..."

Spike walked into the dungeon, carefully taking in the current physical and emotional states of his lifelong friend and mentor. He was crestfallen by how she looked at the time. The color was drained from her whole body and her mane and tail were a mess. Of course, being stuck in a holding cell in a dungeon for a night probably wasn't the best way to keep a healthy, shiny coat, but he knew it wasn't just that.

"...Do you remember anything you did last night?" Spike started, wondering where he should start.

Twilight nodded her head with very little vigor.

"Yeah, I remember pretty much all of it now."

Spike stood there for a few more minutes, thinking of the right words to begin with. It was a difficult process, as how could he even respond to the events that transpired the night before without seeming upset or put off about it? He didn't want to grill the unicorn too much, but she needed to know that what she did could've had extreme consequences.

"Well...from how you sound today, I'm guessing that you feel at least somewhat sorry for it."

"I do Spike. I don't even know what came over me!"

Spike thought back to earlier in the night, after Twilight's rampage, but before going off to bed himself. He had spoken to Princess Celestia about the incident. He left out most of the gory details, as he didn't want to completely put her off, but he did let them know that they had everything under control, and Twilight would be just fine in the morning. This seemed to put the princess' mind at ease, and surprisingly it was as if she had never been woken up in the first place. She drifted back into a peaceful slumber quite easily.

"We're very lucky about last night, Twilight. The princess is either none the wiser, or doesn't want to punish you for what happened, and that is very good."

Twilight was relieved, "Thank goodness..."

"However, it could've gone much worse. You've got to learn how to control yourself Twilight! We won't be living here long if every few years you start having these lust attacks at random."

"But Spike...I know that the princess and I were meant to be together, it just has to be that way!"

Spike was horrified at what he just heard.

"Twilight, let's get something straight here. Princess Celestia is your teacher and friend, not your personal love slave. I don't know how, why, or what happened to make you believe that you two have some other ulterior connection, but I've seen the way you look at her. It's a really possessive, unhealthy attraction that is going to get you in more trouble than it is worth."

"What are you talking about Spike? It is completely worth it! I'm not possessive of her, she wants this, and you and everypony else are just trying to get in my way!"

Twilight was starting to get irritated once again, both at the accusations that this was somehow wrong of her, and also at her dragon assistant for keeping her and Celestia apart time and time again.

Spike looked down at the floor sadly and huffed. There was no getting through to her as she was right now. He dragged along the floor at a snail's pace toward the doorway.

"Hey, Spike, I'm still speaking to you here! Don't you dare walk away from me! You just don't know how I feel about her, and she about me! I'll show you one day, I'll show everypony!"

Boom! Spike slammed the door to the dungeon, blocking out the muffled gripes and curses Twilight was no doubt throwing at the dragon.

"Maybe she just needs another day or two to calm herself..." Spike whispered to himself hopefully.

A/N - ...Well...it wasn't supposed to be as cracked out as that turned into. Guess that's what happens when you have a sudden bolt of inspiration/crack cross your mind. I swear the rampage scene was completely off the top of my head and I wasn't going to go that far before. Thanks again everyone!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N - Alright, this is the last "groundwork" chapter to get the story going. Sorry there's not much action in this one (unless you count Twilight's delusions as action...lol), but I've got some things planned for later chapters that will be worth the wait.

And so, we come back to the present day once again. Twilight was sure taking an awfully long time in that shower. Spike wondered what she could be doi...on second thought, Spike probably didn't want to know what she was doing in there right now...

After that incident that happened over a year ago, Twilight had inexplicably come to her senses and focused once again on the life and studies ahead of her. She got back her coat and mane color. She started eating again, with gusto in some cases, she must have been starving after the little she had eaten in days. Her sleep schedule returned to her. All seemed just right with the world after a few days of detox, fresh air, and intense study. Spike still doesn't know why this is. He theorizes that Twilight must go into some kind of fugue state where the fixation part of her mind completely takes over and allows for little else to enter. In general, Twilight does look up to Celestia, and maybe in the part of her mind that is her she has some kind of innocent crush on the princess, but what happened that night, especially, wasn't her at all.

Even though Princess Celestia came to Spike and Twilight a few days after the incident and told them of "the strangest dream she had ever had". There may have been some part of the princess' mind that registered the night in a clarity Spike hadn't expected. The princess would come over to the Canterlot library every now and then and almost implore Twilight to make some friends of her own, since Twilight would spurn just about everypony and everything that wasn't either studying, or the princess. Maybe she knew about what had happened all along, and just didn't want to make a huge scene about it?

Truth be told, Twilight hadn't made a lot of friends in her life, and the only ones she had she didn't really go out and find herself. Spike was her test when she was younger, and the princess came to her to make Twilight her student. Twilight was a lot more popular than she probably felt or knew. She didn't have a very high opinion of herself, but Spike saw the looks she would get from the other colts in class, and they had a lot more on their minds than just getting her to tutor them... Of course, she didn't even notice them, especially when they had Princess Celestia giving a lecture. Much of Twilight's energy, whether in her fugue state or in her typical one, was devoted to the princess. Twilight relished in the praise Celestia doted on her for completing a research paper and passing with flying colors, which was pretty much all of the time, as she was uncannily brilliant for somepony her age. She never wanted to disappoint her mentor, and even the thought of doing so would be soul crushing. Spike, in the time he had known Twilight, could also tell when she looked at the alicorn, she didn't hold a lot back. He could see an adoration in her eyes that told him her mentor and ruler could do no wrong. It would be heartwarming to Spike, provided that it didn't end up turning into the ravenous obsession he was so afraid to witness.

The Nightmare Moon fiasco was certainly one reason for Twilight's move to Ponyville, but both the purple unicorn and the little dragon knew that in some way, they were sent here because of that day, when Twilight finally snapped.

Oh well, that's the past now, and all Spike can do is learn from his mistakes and ensure that his own mentor doesn't do anything she will undoubtedly rue, especially now that her other side has surfaced yet again. Spike realized one mistake he had made just a short while ago, one that was so obvious a trap that he face-palmed himself for being so blind. He remembered reading that last letter he sent to Princess Celestia...

- Dear Princess Celestia -

I am pleased to inform you that my research into the magic of friendship is coming along quite well, and that I am still learning a lot from my new friends here in Ponyville every day. However, I've been undertaking a secondary project for a few weeks as well. I've been hard at work in my lab, testing new and old materials and liquids, and I've recently discovered a phenomenon that I am confident will change the lives of ponies across Equestria for the better.

This research is far too lengthy and sophisticated to write about all on one parchment. In fact, I believe that five parchments probably wouldn't even be enough. Therefore, I would like to schedule a presentation with you in three days so that I can show you, firsthoof, just how exciting and helpful this new finding will be! If we could make it around midday, I would be most appreciative. Thank you very much, Princess!

Your loyal student,  
>Twilight Sparkle<p>

Spike looked over the letter again one more time. He was pretty tired tonight, and wasn't paying that close of attention.

"Uh...sounds good to me!" he exclaimed before quickly whisking it off to the princess.

"CRAP!" Spike almost screamed out loud, reprimanding himself for not being more observant. "Twilight hasn't been down in her lab at all for more like five months! She couldn't have possibly made a presentation for a lab study even if it fell from the sky and landed on her back!"

What's more, since moving to Ponyville, every study conducted by the unicorn and her assistant has been sent via scroll to the princess, no invites for presentations, not even going to Canterlot to give them, no exceptions. There were reasons, after all, that Twilight and Spike were sent to live in Ponyville. They've used over ten whole scrolls before for some of their studies, much to the consternation of the princess, who finally told them that she would take their word for it at that point.

"Like I said...all in the past...right?"

Spike peeked again through the crack in the door to Twilight's room, a room built by Twilight quite recently to get some privacy, as, even Spike will admit, he tends to get a little bit snoopy at times. Hey, if one of her books is lying out on her table, for the world to see, he's going to partake! Twilight was back out of her room, lying on her bed with another one of her textbooks wrapped in her magic aura. Spike noticed it immediately, he had found it before while sneaking in one night... It was actually one she had written and published herself. Spike felt proud of her for it. She was such a young mare and yet was already writing scholarly papers and journals, official ones that other ponies than just the princess or some of her other professors might actually read. Spike's proud smile had faded that night when he beheld the title.

"Seducing an Alicorn for Dummies..."

Great...that's really all he needed right now...

While Twilight read quietly, Spike took another opportunity to mull over his situation. Pretty soon, he'd be so busy foiling Twilight's every plan to ensnare the princess that he won't have much time to think.

He started thinking about Rarity. Oh yes...Rarity! Spike had no idea why he was so attracted to a pony instead of other dragons. Come to think of it, he had only ever lived around ponies his whole life. Maybe with that kind of exposure, he appreciated and knew what a hot mare looked like, but not so much what he would look for in a dragon. In fact, he found the dragons he had known to be kind of...ugly. That's what happens when a pony raises you your entire life he guessed.

Rarity was just so...everything he ever wanted in a pony wife. She was elegant, intelligent, generous, kind...extremely sexy...

"Whoa, drooling a little there," Spike thought to himself.

He was completely fixated on her, when he wasn't focused on helping Twilight with the daily grind. It was almost like Twilight and the pri... NO, NO NO NO NO NO! It wasn't like that at all! Nope, not one bit! He wasn't madly obsessed! Okay...maybe a little...but this was different! Okay...maybe not that much different...

Spike tore his thoughts away from Rarity, trying to convince himself that what he felt for her wasn't the same as Twilight for Celestia. Anyway, being a bit of a hypocrite aside, he knew that he would never make Rarity do anything she wouldn't want to, and as demonstrated with Twilight, she was quite willing to force herself on Celestia if necessary.

He was under the impression that Twilight was unaware that the dragon could tell that she was slipping back into her fugue state, as he was still calling it. The only thing he really had at this point was the element of surprise, ever since giving that letter to the princess, and sealing her fate.

"Maybe she wouldn't be able to come, yeah, that's it!" Spike tried to reason with himself, "...No...Princess Celestia never refuses anything that Twilight asks of her personally..."

It was set in stone, and there wasn't another way out of it, other than to write her another letter telling her that Twilight had gone bonkers. She'd probably roast his butt if she found out about that. Either way he looked at it, Spike knew that he'd probably have to take some kind of searing pain in order to keep the unicorn from her goal. If it kept them from getting banished, or ruining their relationship with the princess, Spike would do anything to stop her from ravaging their sovereign. It would be difficult, as angering the unicorn had proven near-fatal in the past, but it had to be done!

Spike looked on as Twilight continued reading her book to herself.

Twilight was hardly even focused on her prized, published work, as she was far too deep in her own fantasies to register the words on the page.

"Mmmm...my Princess..."

INSIDE TWILIGHT'S DELUSIONS -

Celestia, the regal and lovely princess of Equestria, sauntered into Twilight's laboratory with a confident demeanor befitting her.

"My faithful student, Twilight Sparkle, you've chosen such a wonderful day with perfect weather to present your project to me!"

"Princess Celestia..."

Twilight's eyes and mouth hung open limply as she took in the sight of her one and only goddess, as radiant and youthful as ever, with her mane and tail billowing around her. Twilight always knew she had the most snowy, curvaceous body in Equestria, but seeing it up close and personal like this nearly made her faint with desire. Her entire being throbbed painfully as the princess looked deeply and caringly into her eyes, a gentle stare she had come to crave like some kind of hard drug. She started sweating profusely as she attempted as well as possible to greet the alicorn without freaking her out.

"It is so nice that you could make it, Princess Celestia!" Twilight almost shouted when she felt the sensation of her own teeth start to tremble so much that she couldn't get the words out.

"I would never miss a single one of your informative presentations, Twilight. You've always had such a knack for studying and research that other unicorns have not. I'm so proud of you, my star pupil."

Twilight was at a loss for words, mostly because of the vibrations in her entire body, but also because she had heard those words from the lips of her teacher that addicted her even more than her smile, "I'm proud of you." She felt like she could die happily in that moment, but knew that wouldn't do, because she had a stellar report to give to her princess.

Her report (who knows what on, this is her fantasy after all...) went off without a hitch. Twilight was so confident in her speech and actions that one could mistake her for one of the greatest scientific minds in history. The princess was awe-struck by how thorough, detailed, and eloquent the presentation was.

"That was amazing, Twilight! I simply must send it to the Royal Department of Research right away!"

Twilight was overjoyed, but she had another reason for inviting the princess that day, one that couldn't go unsaid.

"Um...Princess Celestia?..."

"Yes, my faithful student, what is it?"

Twilight bit her bottom lip nervously, knowing that she has to come out with it sooner or later.

"You're such a great teacher and ruler. You're a really, really beautiful mare! I've wanted to tell you this for a long time, but really haven't gotten the courage to yet... I...I love you Princess! More than anypony can possibly imagine!"

Celestia was taken aback for just a moment, Twilight had just abruptly screamed it out, so fast that she almost didn't hear what it was she said. She looked on at Twilight for a moment, who was starting to feel horrible that she wasn't responding.

"I...I'm sorry Princess...I...I don't what came over me there. If you don't...want to stay now...I'll understand..."

Twilight was near the point of tears now. She had offended her mentor so much that she wasn't even acknowledging her presence anymore. Who knows what in pony hell she would do to her now.

"Twilight Sparkle..." Celestia ordered softly yet sternly.

"Um...yes Princess?..." Twilight slunk back a little bit, fearful of what ever punishment was about to be meted out to her.

"Do you wish to hear my reply?..."

Twilight could only nod her head in the affirmative, frightened by the uncharacteristic grumble in the Princess' voice.

Celestia stood for another minute or so dramatically, before cantering up to the unicorn slowly.

Twilight wrenched her eyes shut tight. What was Celestia waiting for? Just punish her already! Just then, something warm and wet invaded her mouth. That's odd, what exactly was going o... Twilight opened her eyes, only to find her lifelong teacher and friend locking lips with her. It was one of the most ecstatic feelings Twilight had ever experienced. She tried to give the kiss back to her, but Celestia seemed to be enjoying this much more than originally intended because her tongue was flicking around Twilight's mouth at a feverish pace. It was all Twilight could do to reach over with one of her hooves and run it through the soft, white fur of Celestia's coat, earning a low moan from the princess. If Twilight could also moan at how luscious her body felt all around, or at the princess wantonly exploring her mouth, she would, but she couldn't, as Celestia's tongue was practically choking her in desperation to feel every last inch inside of the younger mare. She finally pulled back a little to speak.

"I thought you would never reciprocate my feelings, Twilight! Do you realize how long I've had to stand by as your teacher and be able to do nothing when all I wanted was to pull you up to the chalkboard during class and have my way with you?"

"Oh Princess..." Twilight was cut off immediately by a hoof tenderly pressing into her lips.

"Call me Celestia, Twilight. It would be awkward if I were to demand you call me princess anymore, that is...unless you want to..."

Celestia had a lustful, almost predatory gleam in her eyes. Twilight looked like she wanted to speak, but Celestia was through being patient, and started giving wet kisses down her neck, making her jump in surprise every so often.

"But...Celestia, what will everypony else think when they find out? A student and her mentor/princess, it's absolutely scandalous!"

Of course Twilight didn't give half a shit what anypony else would say about it, but wanted to be reassured that Celestia felt the same way.

"...Let them talk..." Celestia spoke up for only a short second before wrapping her front hooves around Twilight, after pushing her gently to the cold, hard floor, and proceeding lower with her kissing. Twilight was actually enjoying the roughness her ruler was exhibiting in pleasuring her. Twilight would've let Celestia do anything to her in that moment.

"Oh Twilight," Celestia tried to get out between frantic licks and sucks, "I want you to come back to Canterlot with me! I know you'll have to leave all of these wonderful friends you have made, and I wouldn't wish for you to do so under normal circumstances, but I...just absolutely must have you there! I promise I'll make it worth your while."

Twilight was heatedly gasping and panting at this point, her princess was a tiny bit rougher with the treatment than she had imagined, but if anything, it only made the love making session they were having right on her lab floor even better!

OUTSIDE OF TWILIGHT'S DELUSIONS -

"Oh, Your Majesty, please, not there, you're going to make me!..."

Spike held in his vomit, and strangely enough his excitement, as he saw the entire masturbation scene unfold in front of his very eyes. Okay, he knew she was doing this in the shower pretty much every night, but good lords and ladies, why did she have to start up again in her own bed, where he could see every tiny thing she did with her labia. If she even knew he was outside the room, or might come in at any time, she obviously didn't care. For Spike, it was like watching a natural disaster tear through the town, horrible to behold, but too intriguing and foreign to tear his eyes away from it.

Yep, it was just as bad or worse than the last time Twilight went insane. Spike decided that he had seen enough tonight, and would need his rest if he were to combat this "dark" Twilight. For now, he could only formulate plans, and formulate them he will.

Twilight's chest was still heaving slightly, after having a satisfying, yet somehow empty feeling, masturbation session. She was just starting to calm back down when she heard rustling coming from the stairs of the library. It must've been Spike. Oh no...

"Darn...a stain..." Twilight looked at her bedspread, it was darker in a small patch. She'd have to hide it in case Spike came into the room. She had a feeling that Spike was already cognizant of her return to madness, or in her mind, return to focus on the most important thing in her life, Celestia. Nevertheless, little did Spike know that she had her own tricks and traps to bait and mess around with him. He'd never even see it coming.

There was a light rattling on the door to her bedroom.

"Uh Twilight? Good night, I'm going to bed!"

"All right Spike, sweet dreams..."

Spike closed the door behind him slowly. Once she heard the familiar click of the door closing, she gave it an evil grin.

"You'll need them, 'cause this is going to be a nightmare for you!"

Twilight laughed to herself as quietly and evilly as possible. After closing up her private stash of books and putting them into their proper places, she ran to her closet to pull out another blanket, one that preferably wasn't completely wet. She pulled one of her replacement blankets out, which was a blanket exactly like the star-patterned one she just had. Actually, all of them were the exact same pattern of stars and celestial bodies. Don't you just love cartoons? (trollface...)

Anyway, Twilight went back over to her bed and got in. She would have to put her fantasies of Celestia on hold while she was distracting and ultimately keeping Spike from ever knowing what her true plans were.

"Bring it on Spike, I'll prove in three days who's the mistress and who's the assistant around here!"

A/N - A little preview of chapters to come, Spike's "fugue state" theory couldn't be further from the truth. If anything, the "crazy" Twilight IS the real Twilight. There is no difference between the supposed "states".

Anyway, thanks again, I'll be off the comp for a few days, but I'll be back.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N - Thanks for the reviews everyone. I'm always pleasantly surprised by just how supportive the community is here. Enjoy the next installment!

Twilight awoke the next morning to the cacophonic sound of pots and pans being hit by each other downstairs.

"...Ergh...Spike, you might be a decent cook, but you need to be less noisy while doing it!" Twilight thought to herself.

She could hardly tear herself out of bed, the urge to slip back into dreamland with her visions of her bodacious mentor was almost too great. She threw the covers off of her, bombarding the unicorn with the morning cool. She had to get up, it was the time to set her plans into motion. She had to start right away.

"More than likely," Twilight reasoned to herself, "Spike will try to do everything he can to get me away from him, so that I can't watch him like a hawk. I just know he's going to be making something or plotting something while I'm out of the house, but I've got another surprise for him coming. I'm already three steps ahead of the little boy..."

Twilight smirked to herself, knowing that Spike would never be able to beat her at her own game. She brushed her mane and tail, getting the kinks and knots out of them, watching the mirror the entire time.

"Who's that sexy unicorn who's about to get lucky in three days? You are, yes you are!"

Twilight made smooching faces at her reflection in the mirror, and made suggestive eye and body poses to herself. She was probably having too much fun with this when a voice cut through the door to her room.

"Hey there Sleepyhead! Time to get up! I've made some breakfast downstairs that's going to go to waste if you're not there to eat it!"

Twilight almost jumped out of her skin. Here she was, losing track of time again. It was well after the time she usually woke up, and Spike and her had a lot of work to do today in the library.

"Alright, I'm up! I'm coming down soon!"

"Okay!..."

Twilight looked in the mirror one more time.

"Yes Princess Celestia, you'll soon have all of this..." Twilight motioned with a hoof down her body. She finally put the brush down and trotted over to the doorway of her room, heading down into the kitchen area.

She took note that the library was unusually tidy for this time of the morning. Twilight knew that Spike had a bad habit of leaving at least a few books out and not dusting at least a few of the shelves until the next afternoon. Spike probably didn't have a clue that she knew of his little tricks and cheats to make the place look better than it actually was, but she knew alright. He should know her more than that, she was always meticulous when it came to those sorts of things. She even noticed today that the floor had, by some unknown manner, been polished to a bright, almost blinding, shine. What was that little weasel cooking up today?

She stepped into the kitchen nonchalantly, preparing for the delicious meal that had been teasing her nostrils from the bedroom. What she saw was a great mess of pots, pans, silverware, and foods, both cooked and uncooked, strewn about the floor, sink, and cupboards. This was hardly a surprise for her though. Spike had absolutely zero finesse when it came to cooking anything. How it ended up being better than the cooking of anypony else she knew in Equestria was far beyond her scope or, in most cases, care. She took one look at the Belgian waffles on her plate and her stomach growled like a manticore. Spike was there getting everything else cleaned up as fast as possible, knocking other pots and pans on the floor and having to start all over again.

"Hey there, Twilight. Sit down right over there, that's yours over on that one."

Twilight eagerly took her seat and sniffed the glorious waffles with delight.

"Oh Spike, you're so messy in the kitchen. How do these things you make turn out so good?"

Twilight had just scooped a magic-aided forkful into her waiting mouth. Spike just bashfully turned around so that he wasn't facing her anymore.

"It's nothing Twilight, but it's good you enjoy them. Considering where the recipe came from..." Spike's bashful smile turned into a mischievous grin that Twilight couldn't see with him turned about.

"Oh, really?" She could hardly stop eating them long enough to inquire, "Where did you get it?"

Spike's grin went imperceptibly wider as he told her.

"...Princess Celestia gave it to me..."

Spike received the response he had been looking for, as he heard Twilight start to choke on a bite of waffle she had just put in. She took a swig of her morning tea beside the plate to calm herself and get the offending particle down the pipe.

"Oh, sorry about that Spike! It's just...I've never known that our princess was such a marvelous cook!"

"Yeah...sure you didn't..." Spike worded to himself teasingly, as he set the rest of the cookware and silverware into their proper storage places. He went over and sat down at his own plate of waffles, encrusted with emeralds. Twilight took notice of the gems in his food and looked at him with an uneasy stare.

"What? Oh...no there aren't any in yours Twilight, I made mine separately!"

Twilight was relieved at that, and the look on her face told Spike she was.

The two friends and coworkers sat in a thick yet comfortable silence. The only deviation present in their actions from every other breakfast since the beginning of their time together was to eye each other suspiciously when one knew that the other wasn't looking. They knew they were hatching strategies, and were curious to see what the next move would be, or what move they would be forced to impose on the other first. Soon, they finished up, putting their plates in the sink, and heading out into the main area of the library to start the day's work.

Twilight stretched a little with her front and back hooves out, and went up on her back legs to reach toward the sky with her front.

"Ah...that was a great breakfast! Now, it's time to open the library!"

Spike went over quickly to her side before she could unlock the door.

"On second thought Twilight," Spike rambled so fast that the unicorn whipped her head around to look at him wide eyed, "why don't you leave the library to me today? You must be so tired after all of the studying we did last night, and what's more, you've been working on that...chemistry project...for your presentation to the princess...am I right?" Spike cocked an eyebrow (or whatever would've been his eyebrow) at the pony interestedly.

A bead of sweat rolled down Twilight's face.

"Oh...yes...that's right! I...I've been really beat after those all-week preparations!" Twilight laughed nervously at the weird, accusing look the little dragon was giving her.

"Then that's all the more reason to!" Spike perked right up, "I'll watch the books for you today Twilight. You need to go out and visit your friends. You know, get some fresh air...clear your head...go see a shrink..." Spike accidentally spoke out.

"What was that last one..." Twilight asked with a dry ice in her voice.

"Go get a drink?..." Spike grinned cheekily at his own slip up and giggled embarrassedly.

"I don't know Spike, do you think you can handle all of that responsibility yet? I mean, you're still fairly young, and you haven't been all on your own for a while. Are you sure?"

Spike was a little too enthusiastic in his reply.

"Yes, yes, of course I can! Leave it to me Twilight! Pretty soon, you'll have competition around here if you want to keep your job."

"Don't push your luck, Spike..." Twilight looked at him deadpanned.

"Alright, alright, I know! Just let me have this today Twilight. It'll be good to see how I can keep the place going without supervision."

"Well...if you're sure..." Twilight rolled her eyes coyly at the purple dragon.

"Go go go! Enjoy yourself out there Twilight! You can't be inside on such a gorgeous day!" Spike waved his arms dramatically outside after throwing the door open. Once outside a small droplet of water fell into his eye...

"It's...uh...about to rain I think Spike..." Twilight frowned incredulously.

"Uh...bring an umbrella hat?..." Spike said as if he were asking himself more than telling Twilight.

"Sigh...if you're that intent on getting me out of the house, then I guess I'll just go see a few ponies today..." Twilight sighed in a mock resignation.

"That's great!" Spike yelled loudly, "Uh...I mean...for you that is...heh heh..."

"I'll be back to check up on your progress Spike, don't let me down."

"AYE AYE CAPTAIN!" Spiked made a salute posture with a fake stern look on his face.

Twilight grabbed her saddlebags and her umbrella hat out of the closet in the main lobby area of the library and pranced back outside.

"Alright, I'm heading out now."

Spike hugged the door as he started inching it ever so slowly shut.

"Okay...see you later Twi...don't worry, I've got everything under control." Spike about had the door closed, but was standing with it opened just a little so he could make sure she would be gone.

"That's right...under control..."

Spike then slowly clicked the door closed and rested against it. Hoping to not hear the stomping of hooves on the doorstep.

"Horse apples!" Spike put a claw to his face in relief, "I thought she'd never get out of here!"

Spike started pacing the room, working out parts of his plans.

"Okay, well...the number one priority here is that when Princess Celestia comes to the door in three days, Twilight must, and I mean MUST, not meet with her! I'm going to have to fake some kind of illness for her, something where she would not be able to see the princess, but where her life isn't in any real danger and we have to go "look for her" anyway."

Spike stroked his chin in thought.

"Of course, Twilight wouldn't, in a million years, agree to this, so I'm going to have to trap her somewhere for the day in order to keep her out of the picture. I will do the presentation in her place, I don't know how...but I'm gonna find something to appease the princess enough that she'll think it's Twilight's work, but in reality I'm the one who did everything."

Spike went over to some of the shelves, looking for any kind of chemistry book he could find. Unfortunately, this was one of the very subjects that Spike would all but snore through when Twilight would study it. He didn't have the faintest clue where to begin.

"Well..." Spike thought to himself, "I suppose I could change it up a little and make it into a cooking presentation..."

It was something, as Spike was a lot better of a cook than he was a chemist, and there must have been at least basic similarities...right?... He'd burn down the entire lab trying his hand at any kind of chemical mixing or separating. Even less did he know about the properties of these chemicals or, heaven forbid, the names and symbols for elements in the periodic table.

He remembered, though, that he had to act as if Twilight were the driving force behind the entire project. Well...Twilight was a good chef, he thought, though it had been years since he had even tasted her foodstuffs. What could go wrong though? She was an excellent chemist, when she wasn't off in la-la land hoofing herself to sex fantasies of their beloved matriarch. She had made things ten or twenty times more complex than simple food dishes. Princess Celestia shouldn't be able to tell the difference between Twilight's or his cooking.

It was settled then, he'd get a few cookbooks together, using his superior and creative culinary powers, and create something new and exciting that would warrant the princess of Equestria to make an appearance on the humble doorstep of the Ponyville Library.

"I'll have to do it a bit at a time though, and hide all of the evidence from anypony's prying eyes, since I tend to make a few messes every now and then..."

It was more like every time he made breakfast, lunch, and dinner...but that was a tiny technicality.

Spike was more and more relaxed by the second, complacent in the fact that he could trap Twilight into being indisposed for the presentation with her mentor, and doing a presentation himself that he could pass off as Twilight's creation. There you go! Crisis averted!

There was a small knock on the door from the outside. Spike, lost in thought, shook his head out of his plans so that he might greet the expectant borrower properly. He went on over and opened the door happily, ready to start the daily grind and put his plans into motion.

"Welcome to the Ponyville Library! I'm Spike. How may I be of assistance to you?"

* * *

><p>Twilight had watched as the little dragon stood behind that door, with an obviously guilty look on his face, as he inched it closed. For being a possibly higher developed mind, he was such a little kid sometimes. How could he not have thought she'd be suspicious with all of the uncharacteristic remarks and gestures he had melodramatically demonstrated.<p>

"He must think I'm some kind of foal..." Twilight thought to herself, almost a little reluctant now to completely shatter his hopes and dreams of keeping her away from her princess, knowing that she would thoroughly curb stomp him when they clashed over a battle of wits. Here, he had once again fallen into another trap.

"He thinks he's safe now, but pretty soon, I'll have the entire town of Ponyville demanding he be locked up!"

A passerby took notice of her presence and bowed his head in a gentle hello. She just smiled at him as sweetly as she could, while in her own mind she wickedly cackled at Spike's inevitable misfortune.

First on her list of ponies to turn against him...Applejack...

Twilight knew that Applejack was probably the closest pony to her, and one of her friends, so it would be easier to get her to trust the devilish unicorn. She always set up her apple (and apple accessories...) cart in front of the town square, where the orange earth pony would undoubtedly get the most business. Boy...did Twilight have a story to tell her...

She walked into the town square, which was pretty crowded right now, but seeing as it was morning, that was to be expected. Applejack always got up bright and early to get down to the square, so that no minute was wasted, and the apples would be as fresh as the moment Celestia's sun had grown them...mmm...Celestia...

"Get it together Twilight!" she nearly barked at herself in the middle of town. "Now's not the time to space out whenever...she's mentioned."

She trotted briskly through the square, hoping to catch sight of the cowpony, and also to get the cloudy visions out of her head.

Sure enough, right about smack dab in the middle of town, Applejack was screaming her usual sales pitch to her potential customers.

"Step right up y'all! These apples ain't gonna eat themselves you know! Come on down to the Apple Family stand! We'll treat you to some always fresh, always mouth-watering apple products!"

Twilight could zero in on her from a mile away, she was certainly a good salespony.

"Hey there Applejack! Boy, you come out here even when it's going to rain don't you?"

Applejack greeted her friend warmly.

"Howdy Twilight! I don't really have much of a choice now. Apples only stay fresh for so long. Gotta get'em out there while they're nice and new. Care to take a look, Twi?"

Twilight was already pretty full from the breakfast she had had just a half hour or so ago.

"I'll take you up on that offer some other time, Applejack. I just ate breakfast not too long ago."

"Oh, suit yourself then."

Applejack left the cart over to her brother, Big Macintosh, who was a little perturbed that she would just up and leave work to hang out with somepony.

"Sorry Big Macintosh, but you know my motto, always make time for your friends. I'll be back in a couple of minutes here. Thanks a lot, Big Brother."

Big Macintosh was still kind of upset, but with the way Applejack called him big brother and said she'd be back in a few minutes, he didn't see what harm could happen in it.

"Alright, just be back soon," he chided her gently.

Twilight and Applejack sat over on a bench not but a few yards away from the apple stand. That way, if she were needed back, Applejack would be right in the line of sight.

"So then Twilight, what brings you out here today? I would've reckoned you'd be studying right now."

Twilight shrugged at the observation her friend made. She was so unaware of what Twilight had brewed up to take down Spike and keep him from ruining everything.

"Well, I've just been a little...busy with some other thoughts lately."

Here it comes, time to bring on all of the shock, guilt, and victimization and have Applejack eating out of the bottom of her hoof.

"Oh really, like what kind of thoughts?"

Twilight started the act, looking up at Applejack with a nervous blush on her face.

"Applejack..." Twilight stammered, "there's this...stallion I've been...thinking about lately..."

She tried to seem as flustered and mentally disheveled as she could. Who would've thought that Twilight would be such a great actor?

"What...you mean like...thinking about as in...liking him, Twilight?"

Applejack showed her genuine shock in the face of Twilight's fake excitement.

"Well...you could say that...possibly..."

Suddenly Applejack let out a huge breath of relief. Twilight stopped her act for a moment to gawk in surprise at the actions of her orange friend.

"That's just swell, Twilight! The other girls and I thought you'd never come around to socializin' with colts! You were always so...shut in all the time and..."

"Heh heh...I...get it, Applejack. Yes, I have found a stallion I really like..."

"Well tell me about him! What's he like?"

Twilight hadn't thought that far ahead. She had to think up some kind of farce, and ad lib for a while with that.

"Um...actually, he may be coming here sometime, so I'd rather show all of you in pony, instead of ruin the surprise."

Twilight smiled at her friend as reassuringly of her lie as possible. Let's just hope that the element of honesty didn't have some kind of interior sixth sense...

"Oh...don't worry about that Twilight! You can tell me whenever you're ready."

The unicorn sighed in relief. All she needed was to blow her cover before she even got started on this convoluted scheme. She continued in a more fluid, conversational manner.

"There's been a huge problem with this for a while though."

"What might that problem be Twi?"

"Well...Spike has been, getting rather aggressive...ever since I came out about me having a coltfriend..."

Twilight made a fairly convincing fake whimper and pout. She really looked like she was going to cry, which was the look she was going for.

Applejack sat stunned with a confused stare. Spike had been getting aggressive because of this? That didn't sound like the cheerful little ball of cuteness at all.

"Wh...what do you mean, Twilight? I don't understand."

Twilight was grateful for having taken that acting class while she was still at the Canterlot School for Gifted Unicorns. She learned how to cry on cue so many times, she swore she would never act in another stage play or movie ever again. However, it was paying off rather well to her liking here. She cried into her hooves with a tiny glint of mischief in her eyes.

"Whoa Twilight, is it really that bad!"

Twilight made a "yes" nod as she continued to cry even harder than before.

"...What did he do to you Twilight?..."

She took another minute to pull herself together, and replied in as pathetic a tone as Applejack had ever heard before.

"It...it's my fault...I shouldn't have disobeyed him!..."

She looked like she was going to bawl all over again.

"What are you talking about Twilight! What did he do!"

"...It all started just yesterday..."

MORE CRAZED FABRICATIONS FROM TWILIGHT

"What did I tell you about getting coltfriends, Twilight?"

Spike held Twilight down on her own bed, grasping her front hooves in his little claws tightly, almost tearing through the tender flesh. For being so small, he was as strong as two ponies, as he somehow kept Twilight from throwing him off of her while she was thrashing about, desperate to get out of his hold.

"Let me go Spike! You're hurting me!"

"I SAID," Spike growled heatedly, "what did I tell you about getting coltfriends, Twilight?"

Twilight whimpered, tears and blood from her cuts and bruises streaming down her face.

"...You're my coltfriend...Spike..." She could hardly get it out. The taste of those vile words were like acid, melting her oral cavity away.

Spike growled again, and Twilight couldn't tell whether the grunt was affirmation, anger, or arousal. It could've been all three for all Twilight cared at that moment. Spike's claws let go of her, very carefully and gently. He used the same deadly weapons to trace little unknown patterns around her chest, all the while, his tongue sticking out from at least a foot away, licking her around the neck, eyes glazed over in a possessive, passionate lust. His little hips ground against her stomach, making sick, wet, squelching noises as he did so.

"Very good Twilight...very good..."

Spike aggressively leaned his face down into her neck, licking now not enough, and roughly sucked and bit into it, earning yelps of burning pain from the unicorn below him.

"Spike, you can't do this! He'll know you've marked me inside and out!"

Spike nearly roared in Twilight's face as he heard her speak of that dumb mule who would dare try to break up the sizable harem of ponies he had made for himself, including every one of Twilight's friends.

"You are mine, Twilight Sparkle! You hear me? You are mine alone! He'll never have you, and you'll never speak to him again, got it!"

He almost seemed to be growing now, the greedy nature of his species taking hold. Twilight was horrified by just how large he was getting. At this rate, once he got too horny...it would be the end of her. Choked sobs were most of what the unicorn could get out while she implored her now double-sized assistant.

"...Please...please don't do this Spike!...I'll never disobey your commands ever again!...Just please don't do this!"

"SILENCE!" The entire room felt like it was caving in around her, the screech deafening. What more could Twilight do than to give into the desires of her not-so-baby dragon?

"Please...be gentle..." Twilight pathetically made one last attempt at saving herself.

"I'LL BE AS ROUGH AS I LIKE, MY LITTLE TOY!"

The pain was unbearable as Spike drove himself into his mare slave, every thrust feeling like coarse sandpaper on her mare parts. Blood was no doubt leaking from them, though Twilight's vision was far too gone to register anything other than suffering...

BACK TO OUR COMFORTABLE REALITY...HOLD ME SOMEPONY...

"What in pony hell!"

Applejack yelled out loud in horror as Twilight relayed the entire twisted scenario to her best friend. The crowd looked at them, shocked at what had just come out of Applejack's mouth.

"...Uh...nothing to see here," she assured everypony, "move along..."

Everypony eventually split off and went back to their daily business.

"I just...don't know what to say, Twilight! How in tarnation could Spike do something like that, to one of his best pony friends no less?"

Twilight sat by, trying her best to keep from hollering out in raucous laughter. She knew she needed a story to tell, but that...that was just sick! It was just off the top of her head. She thought jokingly that maybe she really did need mental help. She couldn't crack in front of Applejack though, and had to act and look depressed and terrified.

"Well...I mean...I did tell you that he thinks about all of us as some kind of weird...pony harem for him."

"Well now...that's just downright indecent! Are you telling me he's thought about me this way too?"

"You...and Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie, and Rarity, and Fluttershy..."

"...but I thought that he only liked Rarity, and not like that!"

"Oh no, Applejack, he has his eyes set on all of us..."

"Dangnabit! That's just creepy and perverted of him! Why, I ought'a go down there and give him a piece of my hoof to feast on right now!" Applejack stood back up off of the bench, ready to kick some dragon ass.

Uh oh, Applejack was having a worse reaction to this than Twilight thought. If she went over to the library now, Spike would know what's up, and her entire plan would be thrown out the window.

"No no Applejack! We've got to get back at him in other ways, you know, more subtle ways..."

Applejack was not eased by the shifty gleam in Twilight's now completely dry eyes and face. Then again, how could she distrust a good friend like Twilight? She'd never do anything bad to anypony, or make up a lie to get somepony in trouble, would she?

"...uh...What kind'a ways are you talking about Twilight..."

Twilight stood up with Applejack, pleased to have her full attention now.

"Well, first off, Spike is probably going to deny this whole thing until he's blue in the face, and say that I'm the one who's gone crazy, not him. If you want to punish him for this, you'll have to support me and tell him that he's the liar. I'll give you the run down of what we're going to plan for his punishment at a later date. All I need...is to know that I've got your support."

Applejack stood for a few minutes, fidgeting. She knew Spike, and she knew he just couldn't be that kind of horrible monster. However, Twilight had told her, herself, just how possessive, ravenous, and sexually abusive Spike really was, or could be, given the chance. Though, Twilight was acting kind of shady herself. If she was confident that Spike was such a bad dragon, then she wouldn't be trying to bargain for her help in getting revenge on him, she'd be trying to get away from that library and out of the situation. It was a tough choice to make, but if Applejack had one fatal flaw, it was that she never turned down a friend in need.

"Okay, I will stand by you in whatever you decide to do Twilight."

"Excellent!" Twilight all but shouted right in front of her, "I mean, thank you Applejack. I'll do my best to keep Spike away from me for a while..."

They waved each other off as Twilight made her way through town in a slow canter, giving a show to Applejack just how morose this situation has made her. Once she rounded a corner out of sight, Twilight stifled a giggle and burst of energy.

"THAT WENT GREAT!" Twilight thought to herself. Applejack was just too trusting, too innocent. She had been roped into something that, she wouldn't know until too late, would frame Spike for a wrongdoing he didn't commit.

* * *

><p>Whoa, if taking care of the library while Twilight was with him was hard, Spike felt that taking care of the library on his own, on top of going into the kitchen every three minutes to check on his secret weapon, was excruciating. Now he knew what it felt like for workers at those fast food places in town to do what they did. He was checking books in, checking books out, dusting shelves and organizing them, categorizing every single book until he was out of breath, and finally, racing back to the kitchen to put in different ingredients, cook portions of the foods he was making, and taste test them himself to see how good...or bad in most cases...all of them had been. From having to streak back through every area at top speeds, his taste testing was less than thorough, and his creativity was increasingly lacking. He hurried back into the kitchen again after escorting a borrower out of the library.<p>

"Okay, so if I add sugar to this meat loaf, and add drain cleaner to this potato soup, and then combine them, I get!..." he put his finger into the concoction, grabbed a tiny piece, and popped it in his mouth, "...a strange, burning diarrhea-puke sensation..."

Spike face-palmed himself roughly. "I knew I should've thrown in shavings of that urinal cake in the bathroom toilet...oh crap...door knocking!"

Spike knocked over a stool to fly out of the kitchen as fast as he could and make his way to the door.

"WELCOME TO THE PONYVILLE...LIBRARY..." Spike ended up fainting mid-sentence.

"OH SPIKE," Fluttershy interjected when she felt the body of the little dragon fall against her in the doorway.

Fluttershy put Spike over onto a conveniently placed red couch near the shelves in the library, added to give patrons somewhere to sit, relax, and enjoy their books if they didn't want to necessarily take the book home with them. In urgency, she took a few quick looks around the room for some kind of paper and pen to write down a note. She found them on one of the tables Spike and Twilight used for their friendship reports to the princess. She took the pencil in her mouth and scribbled down a brief notice that the library was closed until further notice.

After finding some tape in the exact same area, she was somehow able to stick the tape onto the note, gallop outside to stick it on the door, and shut and locked the door, when back inside, so that nopony would be able to disturb the sickly looking dragon.

Spike finally came to about an hour later, being able to take in his surroundings and noticed Fluttershy on the couch with him.

"Ugh...blech...uh...Fluttershy? What just happened? ...What time is it...how long was I out?"

"Oh Spike, you're awake!" Fluttershy was relieved to see the dragon come to, "Why were you the only one in the library today? I thought Twilight would be here with you?"

"Oh...right...um...I told her to take the day off today."

Fluttershy was concerned by the greenish tint that the little dragon was starting to develop.

"That probably wasn't such a good idea Spike, you look really sick right now..."

"Oh this?" Spike tried to laugh off his protesting stomach, filled with the diabolical contents of his witch's pot in the kitchen, "That's nothing! I was just trying to make a new recipe for dinner tonight, and I guess that the ingredients were a little...off?...heh heh."

Fluttershy had a feeling that something else was going on here. Spike didn't just look tired. He was overworked, and his drowsy footsteps upon getting off the couch were proof enough for her.

"Spike...is Twilight working you too hard? I know she's a great friend and all that...but I'm a little...concerned by her treatment of you..."

A previous stunt with a certain phoenix and Fluttershy bird-napping her flew through Spike's mind like a Boeing 737.

"Uh oh...think Spike...Fluttershy's going to put you in her "protective services" if you don't come up with something fast! You'll never be prepared in time if she drags you over to her cottage against your will..."

Spike turned back around to Fluttershy, his nervousness apparent.

"Um...no Fluttershy, I was the one who volunteered to do this in the first place! Twilight has just been so exhausted lately because of her special project she's presenting for Princess Celestia. I felt like she deserved a break, and I'm not going to let her down today."

"Wow...a presentation for the princess? Twilight's never asked her to come for any of her other presentations before..."

Spike probably shouldn't have said that. Fluttershy sounded like she knew this was a really unusual thing for Twilight to do. Spike was trying to keep everypony else from getting involved in this travesty. Though...maybe it might help to have some support from her friends... Wait...how did Fluttershy even know about this in the first place? She hadn't even been around her during these times.

"Uh...Fluttershy...how did you know about that?..."

Fluttershy immediately backed away from Spike shyly.

"Oh...I'm sorry Spike...I didn't mean to be nosy! It's just that...Twilight has been acting a little strange for a long time now...and I was just concerned about her well-being... I've...maybe kind'a spied on you both doing these presentations for a few months?"

Fluttershy hoped that her grin was softening the impact of the extremely invasive, positively creepy confession she had just made to Spike, but it wasn't.

"...A duh...wow Fluttershy...I never even thought or noticed..."

Okay, that was a little out of character for the typically shy pegasus mare to be looking in on them like that, but maybe it was like this for a reason, or at least that's how Spike would rather think about it. He didn't know if he wanted to spill the beans about Twilight's insanity just yet, but he also would've appreciated if Fluttershy were on his side when it finally came to confronting the unicorn about her problems.

"So...did you see anything else?..."

"Oh no no no Spike, I wouldn't dare meddle in your and Twilight's private lives!"

"Ah...good..."

That was nice to know. At least she wasn't watching them all of the time. He had a few skeletons in his closet too, and would feel most uncomfortable if anypony knew about his secret collection of Rarity's hairs that had fallen off of her head at random intervals over the last year. She had a healthy mane, and luxurious too, but hairs grow out and fall to the ground eventually, and that's when Spike picked them up. What? No...it's not obsessive! It's not like he sniffs them every night before he goes to be...(ahem)...let's just get back to the business at hand, shall we?

"So Fluttershy, you've seen Twilight act kind of weird lately too, right?"

Fluttershy looked over at the dragon after it was clear he wasn't mad at her for snooping.

"Oh...yes actually, she's always busy either studying for a presentation or report to send to the princess, or telling me about how wonderful she is. I even got a look at one of her drawings when I came to the library while you two were out. It was just lying on the table, and I didn't want to pry, but I was just too curious about it. It had this writing put all over it, saying, "I (heart) Princess Celestia" on the paper."

Spike mumbled to himself, "...I've seen worse..."

He cleared his throat, now knowing the extent to which Fluttershy was aware of Twilight's crush on the princess...though probably not her crazy back story.

"It's actually gotten much worse than that before, Fluttershy. Twilight has a track record for stalking the princess that goes back as far as I've been able to recount. Truth be told, I think we were actually sent here by the princess to live, because of the many times Twilight has nearly gotten into irreversible damages over this."

Fluttershy was surprised that such an unassuming unicorn pony like Twilight could fall into that kind of behavior.

"Oh my, that sounds really awful Spike! How has she been able to keep under control for so long then?"

"I don't think anypony knows why she goes through these phases. She's like a big sister to me, and I love her, but she's seriously going to get somepony killed one day over this, even if that pony happens to be our princess herself."

Fluttershy was frightened by that news.

"Well...what can we do Spike? Where do we turn?"

"Relax Fluttershy, Spike is here to save the day!"

Spike bombastically gave her a thumbs up, or a claw up...not the middle one...showing her that he was on it, and in a very uncool way as well.

"Princess Celestia has been invited by Twilight to attend this presentation I just told you about in three days. My goal, for the time being, is to keep Twilight from ever showing up to give it. We'll just say she's sick and that she can't do it. It was supposed to be a chemistry project, but I'm going to give a culinary presentation instead, but something that will hopefully be enough to make it seem like Twilight was the one who did everything herself."

Fluttershy looked at the little dragon with a perplexed stare.

"How do you plan on keeping her out of the library long enough to do all of this, Spike?"

"...Well...I'm still working on that part. I've got three days, so hopefully I'll be able to come up with something later tonight."

"If it'll help Twilight...and keep her from doing anything drastic...then I guess I will help you however I can Spike."

Spike seemed very appreciative of her backing.

"Thanks a lot Fluttershy! I haven't planned on telling anypony, so I don't have anything at the moment for you to help with, but I'll call on you if something comes up. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a library to run, and a masterpiece to cook up!"

Fluttershy gave Spike one last look before heading toward the door to the library. Wait...she had come here for a specific reason before.

"Oh, that's right, Spike, could I borrow an instructional book on taking care of rabbits? Angel has been really grumpy lately, throwing carrots back in my face, and...relieving himself...on the floor in a couple of places."

"Oh, I've got just the book." Spike knew, naturally, where most of the books in the library were, and this was pretty easy to find.

"Here you are Fluttershy, the Disgruntled Caregiver's Guide to Rabbits: Including Rabbit Fever (which I'm thinking isn't something you're that concerned about right now...)!"

"Alright, thank you very much Spike, I'll have it back to you in a few days."

"No problem Fluttershy! That book has been sitting there for a long time without being taken out. I doubt you need to bring it back that quickly."

Fluttershy smiled and waved goodbye as she closed the door to the library and took the note off of the doorway, allowing other customers to come back in at their discretion.

Spike was once again alone in the library.

"Oh no...I was out for over an hour there! I've gotta step it up from here on in!"

He was grateful that he wasn't the only one who had noticed Twilight's strange fixation on her mentor. Of course, to Spike it was pretty obvious, but the other ponies didn't know her as well as he did, so unfortunately the warning signs would be less noticeable.

"Now then...where were we? Twilight won't get the better of me this time! I'll make sure of it!"

A/N - Got some fun ideas for the next chapter here. Thanks again everyone!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N - Hey there! I know a lot of you are probably thinking that Twilight is off the deep end, and after this chapter that won't be changed in the slightest, but once you see what our favorite dragon mulls over, we'll see that Twilight may not be the only one...

Twilight still couldn't get over the monumental charade she had just pulled on Applejack. She was doing everything she could not to giggle out loud in the middle of town, where the townsfolk would no doubt start staring at her antics. She already had the dubious reputation of a mad scientist in the community. Most ponies who lived here were of the earthy, traditional sort, and an eccentric unicorn like Twilight (and possibly Rarity, but not as much...) had a lot of trouble fitting into that rigid social mold. They already suspected many unsavory things from the purple pony, and she'd just add fuel to their misgivings if she broke out into hysteric laughter.

"What kind of romantic horror novels have I been reading? Hayseed, that's just downright wrong! Spike raping me into a near-death state?"

She fought with everything she had to keep it all in. If she could look at herself, she'd see a huge, discombobulated smile that stretched both corners of her mouth, permanently ironed on to hold all of the hilariously dirty thoughts in her head. She actually kind of liked that story. It was better than the cruddy romantic version she was going to use at first. She felt like her's would have more impact, since if she did some version where Spike was just jealous instead of stark raving abusive, Applejack would've made her talk to him about it, and her main goal was to demonize the little lizard, not have Applejack lecture her about Spike's "hurt feelings".

"Blech..." Twilight heaved all of a sudden, disgusted by the potential conversation that would've turned into. Applejack would be there too, for who knows why, watching her tell Spike how she didn't feel the same way about him as he did about her.

Yes, this was a much better avenue to take, one where no one would even dare to get within ten feet of Spike, let alone discuss the problem with him, though once she was through telling everypony else about it, he really would be locked up somewhere. Well...it was a price she had to pay for her beloved Celestia...no...scratch that. She would pay ANY price to be with Celestia, no ifs, ands, or buts. Spike may have been her number one assistant, but he was also an inconveniently placed speed bump in her path. If she had to steam roll him to the ground...then she certainly would not hesitate...

Anyway, now was not the time for her to dally. She had other friends to tell "the bad news" to, so that they would spread word around town that Spike was a deviant. Armed with this little gold nugget, nopony would be able to keep quiet for long.

"Well Spike...if you like Rarity so much, let's see how you feel after she never wants to be within the same breathing space of you ever again."

Twilight made her way up to the front door of the Carousel Boutique. It was a really gaudy place for the unicorn's taste, who preferred functionality over this baroque, over-the-top flashiness. Maybe that's the reason Twilight lived in a hollowed out tree...

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

"Just one moment Darling! I'll be there shortly!"

Rarity's voice cut through the door with her typical, personable demeanor. Twilight could hear a lot of clattering and the revving of machines inside her establishment. What the heck was going on in there? Eventually, Rarity threw the door open and greeted whoever it was with style and graciousness.

"Welcome to the Carousel Boutique! How may I be of service?"

"Uh...Rarity?..." Twilight looked at Rarity with an "it's me" look on her face.

"OH, Twilight Sparkle! Do come in, do come in!"

Rarity escorted her friend inside without a second thought, eager to fit her into a new dress. That was the reason she was here, right? Rarity has always been fascinated with designing outfits for her bookish, scholarly unicorn friend. She had spent more of her career than she could stomach working on articles of clothing for the elite, rich, high society sector, as well as the in-style, messy, grungy clientele that seemed to be sprouting up in Ponyville as of late (ahem...RainbowDash...ahem). It was a creative fashion designer's dream to work with such a...challenge...every once in a while.

"I have some fabulous new threads to fit you into, My Dear! You're going to be the most stylish intellectual on the Ponyville scene since...well...ever!"

Twilight wasn't too keen on being dolled and done up today. This was a point of reluctance for the awkward bookpony, coming to the Carousel Boutique. Sure, Rarity was pleasant to be around...most of the time. When she was in her boutique though, everypony became a subject of her creative, and sometimes over-enthusiastic, energies.

"Actually Rarity...I'm kind of pressed on time right now, and as much as I'd love to..." Twilight took a look at a particularly frilly dress that made her cringe at the thought of it hugging onto her body, "...model for you today, I'll have to pass up on the offer..."

Rarity seemed horribly, but in some ways comically, disappointed.

"PLEASE TWILIGHT! You're...one of...my star models! You've got the perfect body for the outfits I just created (for no apparent reason...)!"

Rarity felt and prodded around Twilight's body invasively, sizing up the purple unicorn for future reference.

"Alright Rarity...that's a little too close..."

"Oh I'm sorry Twilight! Sigh...I guess I'll just have to save these ideas for later then..." Rarity dramatically shoved some designs on parchment into one of her many filing cabinets.

"Well, I mainly came over today to tell you something very important."

Twilight turned on the exact same embarrassed face she had for Applejack the last time she duped one of her friends into believing her sob story.

"Twilight, what's this now? You look like you're going to turn into a tomato! What has you in such a tizzy?"

Twilight shyly turned away from the white pony in front of her, putting her head down in an almost shameful way.

"Oh...it's nothing too big...just that I'm seeing somepony right now..."

Rarity didn't quite get what was going on at first, but pretty soon, with Twilight twirling her front hoof on the ground in a circular pattern, and a nervous smile creeping onto her face with her eyes shut slightly, she figured out what it was fairly quick. She quivered with anticipation.

"Twilight...are you telling me that you're having...a romantic tryst...with somepony?"

Twilight only nodded slightly, the movement almost unregistered by the purple-maned unicorn. Twilight turned around to face her again and describe her situation. However, her eyes nearly popped out of her head when Rarity made a girlish squeal that almost blew her ear drums out, and ran over to squeeze onto her with a vice grip that would make pliers feel inadequate.

"That's SPLENDID Twilight!" Rarity had an eyes-shut grin that looked like it would tear her face off if she wasn't careful. She stood back for just a moment to immediately add onto her thought.

"Our other friends and I were starting to take bets on whether or not you would be a spinster for the rest of your life!"

Twilight gawked at the statement. Were her friends really that convinced that she was such a reclusive old maid? She did have a sex drive, and a life outside of reading books, you know!

"I don't know what they've been telling you, Rarity, but as a matter of fact, I have been involved with a stallion for a while." Twilight tried to be as objective in her defense as she could, but some annoyance was present in her voice.

"Well, I think that is fantastic Twilight! So...who's the lucky colt?" Rarity gave her a suggestive double eyebrow wiggle.

"It's...a surprise!" Twilight remembered what she had told Applejack earlier that day, "He might be coming here in a few days...so I'd rather all of you see him...in the flesh...as it were."

"Oh..." Rarity mumbled disappointed, "All right then..."

Twilight decided that it was time to turn on the waterworks, Rarity would never see Spike in the same way again after she was done telling her about his secret atrocities.

"...But Spike..." Twilight forced a tear to slide down her face while staring, dead-eyed, at the other unicorn.

"Spike, what about him?"

Rarity could see the tear shed by her friend. What had happened to Spike all of a sudden?

"He's...not very happy with this arrangement..." More crocodile tears flowed out.

"My goodness Twilight, whatever are you trying to say?"

"I'm saying...that he's been getting really violent lately, not only toward me, but to my coltfriend..."

"Are you suggesting that Spike has been...hitting you and him, Twilight?"

Twilight's face crunched up into a sorrowful snivel that would make Discord "hnnnnngh!".

"It's...much more than that Rarity! He's been...he's been..."

- OH DEAR GOD NO! NOT ANOTHER ONE OF THESE! GET ME OUT OF HERE! -

Spike's fist flew through the stale, library air, and connected with the face of Twilight's coltfriend. Said coltfriend already had deep gashes and bruises peppered around his entire body. Blood matted fur blocked out the normally healthy green coat of her soon-to-be former lover. He sobbed into his neck weakly, as his strength was leaving him from the brutal beating he had just received from Spike, the undisputed master of their residence. He lay on the cold, hardwood floor of the bedroom, his only crime, being caught in Twilight's bed with her.

Spike was also brandishing an extremely sharp butcher knife, intent on quenching his endless thirst for the sweet screams of his victims. The penalty for disturbing the careful fertilization process Spike had planned for all of his mare slaves was a steep one. One that this uppity stallion would not soon recover from.

"You have made a huge mistake coming here, getting fresh with my Twilight, thinking you could hide the foul stench of your love making from my superior smell receptors!"

Spike hovered the blade of the knife mere millimeters away from the stallion's neck, earning a blood-drowned gasp of fright from him. His eyes were bloodshot, wide and dislodged after Spike nearly beat them out of his head. If he could, he'd knock the little dragon off of him, but all four of his legs were broken or bent in unnatural directions, and there would be no escape for the bloody earth pony.

"However, I'm feeling unusually generous tonight, and have decided to spare your worthless life. The next time you think about getting close to one of my fillies ever again, you may as well blow your own brains out, because what I'll do to you will be a hundred times worse!"

With that, Spike growled threateningly into the small space of the bedroom and knocked the blunt side of the blade into the poor stallion's head, knocking him unconscious. Spike didn't really know if he was dead or not, and wasn't making any promises either way, but he would be the victor in both cases.

Twilight could only sit on the bed and wail uncontrollably, bruises covering her body as well, as Spike had sneaked up on both of them in the night and gave them a thrashing. Her coltfriend received the brunt of the attack, as Spike was sending him a painful and effective message that he was the boss around there.

"Now then," Spike went over to the bed and held the shaking, sobbing Twilight in his claws roughly, "it's going to take a lot to get that demon seed of his out of you... I'll wash out every drop with my own!"

Twilight took a glance at her coltfriend on the floor in the corner of the bedroom.

"No Spike...we need to get him some help! He needs medical attention!"

"THAT'S ENOUGH OUT OF YOU! Now...be a good little pony and hold...still!..." Spike closed his mouth greedily over Twilight's own, forcing his lengthy tongue into her pressed lips. She shut her eyes as tightly as she could, and to be able to survive the night thought of a happier time, before she became a part of Spike's sick, demented harem...

- I THINK I'M GOING TO BLOW CHUNKS NOW... -

Rarity's face was slack jawed as Twilight wrapped up the rest of her story, getting more perverted and horrifying every time she retold it. The reaction on her face was...somehow disappointing to the purple unicorn. She was expecting some kind of convulsions to start when she mentioned Spike washing out her coltfriend's sperm with his. Well, the story was told, and hopefully, it wasn't too farfetched for Rarity to believe her.

"Wh...wh...what the...?"

"It's alright Rarity...it's my fault for deceiving him. If you want the truth...I think I've never had a coltfriend before because of this..."

Rarity couldn't believe something so seedy, disgusting, and vile was being done at the Ponyville Library behind closed doors. She also couldn't believe that her kind, sweet little dragon had become such a controlling, violent monster. It just wasn't possible!

"Twilight...is there any chance that Spike would do this to any one of us?"

Twilight only nodded her head dryly.

"How can this be Twilight? Spike is such a gentleman, so considerate, so playful!"

"Well...maybe he was at one point in his life, but now...I guess this is just his true dragon instincts coming out. He only grew up around ponies his whole life...so he's sexually confused, and attracted to ponies instead of dragons, maybe female dragons would be into that sort of possessiveness...I don't know..."

"Instincts or not," Rarity huffed heatedly, "his actions are obviously hurting you and your coltfriend, and he has no business hurting others because he's being jealous!"

Rarity felt deceived. She felt disappointed. She always believed that Spike, had he been a few years older, would've been a fine dragon coltfriend, or at least somepony she could turn to for any kind of support. Now...now she didn't even know who he was...what he was! How could he do this to the one pony in his life who was like a part of his family?

"We need to help him though Rarity, he needs some kind of therapy to better control those instincts."

Rarity pouted at Twilight thoughtfully, intrigued by what she was thinking.

"So...how do you plan on going about "helping" him, as you've put it, Twilight?"

Twilight, without a proper segue, immediately perked up and told Rarity about her great plan of action.

"Okay, well first, Spike will try to deceive us with every ounce of energy he has. We've got to ignore his lies and focus on the fact that Spike needs a lot of reprimanding, and a lot of counseling. I've got a plan that will help us do this, after I get everypony else in on it, but for now, I'll just ask if you're willing to help me in any way imaginable to help him. So, are you?"

Rarity was suspicious about Twilight's sudden bubbly outburst. Didn't she just get through telling her about how he beat her and her coltfriend, and raped her again for the...who knows how many times? She trusted Twilight though, and although she wanted to think that Twilight was lying to her, she couldn't just leave her high and dry, not when so much was at stake.

"I guess...I'll leave it to you to get the preparations done..."

Twilight couldn't be happier...

"YEAH!" she almost yelled out once again, "I mean...that's wonderful Rarity. We'll need everypony we can get to combat this..."

Twilight put on her sad face yet again, waving goodbye to her friend.

"See you later, Rarity."

"Goodbye Twilight, and be careful, don't let him push you around like that anymore, alright?"

"I won't, thanks..."

Twilight slowly walked out of the boutique with her head down. As she clicked the door closed behind her, she huffed tiredly but then...

"Pfft...HEE HEE HEE..." Twilight couldn't take it anymore, she ran out of there as fast as possible to get away from Rarity's boutique so she wouldn't hear when Twilight's sides started splitting.

She was in the middle of town now, and she didn't see any of her friends around, or in earshot. At this point, she almost didn't care who heard her, she couldn't contain it anymore.

"HA HA HA HA HA!" Twilight cried she was laughing so much, she seemed intent on making a huge scene with all of the other ponies staring fearfully at their resident mad scientist, no doubt cackling maniacally at one of her new, dangerous inventions that would turn Ponyville into a wasteland.

"That was priceless! Spike won't be able to show his face for miles at this rate! This story just gets better and better!"

After a few more moments of wheezing to catch her breath from the uncontrollable spasms wracking her diaphragm, she wiped away a single tear of hilarity and made for her next destination, Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie Pie was in for a disastrous surprise...

* * *

><p>A tranquil and thoughtful Spike stood at the boiling pot of water on the stove, staring into and stirring the thin liquid. After Fluttershy had left, the library became a calm, peaceful area for Spike to think about the many times Twilight had tried to accost their fair princess. It seemed that the morning rush of borrowers was replaced with a relaxing lull in work in the midday. His mind was clear now, as clear as the water in the pot. He wouldn't start throwing in random junk like he was doing only a few hours ago, when the hustle and bustle of the library was at its peak.<p>

A different feeling was overtaking him than any he had ever felt in this home of his before. With Twilight gone and nopony else around, this place was extremely lonely. Albeit it was very relaxing, as he had never had this kind of space or silence to think about many things in his life. Just the same, it felt like time had frozen around him, just long enough to let him sit and conjure up times gone by.

As he regressed Twilight's age back further and further, he found that her propensity for shutting herself into her house, and the awkwardness associated with her mannerisms, had increased. At these crucial times in her life, Spike was even younger than her, and thus wasn't well equipped to help her through many of the problems she may have tried to solve herself. One of those issues, maybe not problems necessarily, was her feelings for Princess Celestia.

Of course her parents were there for here, but not in the same ways that the princess was. She really was Twilight's first friend, even before Spike had come into the picture.

Spike was a young whelp then, and even though a dragon fetus, even inside the egg, took note of its surroundings and every bit of information it could to better survive in the wild, he still wasn't in a position to be her friend at the time.

He almost, crazily enough, felt guilty for the many times he had tried to keep the amorous Twilight away from the one she really loved, even if danger was the only concept associated with this detrimental obsession. Here he was, the only other companion Twilight ever had, encouraging her to go out into the world and make new friends, and he was trying to keep her away from her oldest friend, and first love. Of course, Princess Celestia was always very personable, caring, and understanding of every subject she was sovereign of. It was a part of her personality that, if one were as starved for affection as Twilight, could be mistaken for some more personal, intimate bond. That confusion, Spike surmised, must have been one of the determinant factors in why she was so fixated on the princess in the first place.

He laughed to himself as he remembered one of her less intense attacks, probably a year, year and a half maybe, before the one six months before their move to Ponyville.

Twilight had just started to learn that insidious, powerful charm spell of hers that she can enchant on anything or anypony, and make everypony fall in love with them or it. Granted in that day and age, she could only use it to attract one entity to whatever she charmed. It was still really frightening though, as that kind of power really hasn't been seen in many unicorns for a long time.

"With this spell," Twilight began to a nervous Spike, "Princess Celestia won't be able to resist me!"

"Uh...that's kind'a dangerous, don't you think Twilight? What if you attract somepony you don't like?"

"...I...uh...no time for details, Spike! I've got a princess to win over!"

Spike tried to stop her from getting into the princess' chambers himself.

"Come on Twilight! What are you doing? It'll just be a fake love, and once the spell is done, then what?"

Twilight and Spike ran through the Canterlot palace halls, Twilight trying to push Spike into other ponies to keep him from catching up to her.

"It doesn't matter, Spike! She'll realize that she's in love with me eventually, and I'm just speeding up the process here!"

Twilight made her way into Celestia's chambers. The princess was reading a book at the time, but it fell out of her magic grasp when she heard the door to her room slam roughly open. With a shocked look in her eyes, she beheld her prized unicorn student, a flushed look on Twilight's face as she readied the spell.

"NOOOOO!" Spike yelled from the doorway. He sprinted into the chambers as fast as his little legs would let him. He jumped over to Princess Celestia just as the spell was completely finished and turned her head to the side for her.

"Don't look, Princess!"

Spike, in his haste, forgot that he was staring straight at Twilight the entire time.

"Uh oh..."

Twilight was furious at Spike for ruining her spell, which would only work on one pony and then dissipate. She was already tired that day from researching it, and this would be the last time of the day she'd be able to get the energy to activate the charm.

"Spiiiiiiike! Why'd you have to go and ruin it?"

Had Twilight always been so cute? Spike never noticed it before, but he really liked taking in every inch of her body with his eyes. Her own eyes were so big, so gorgeous. He loved the way she scowled at him. She had adorable little ears, he wanted to go over and stroke them in his claws. That wasn't the only thing he wanted to stroke either...those flanks... She was pretty hot when she was mad, and she looked like she was about to beat him up. As the thought crossed Spike's mind, he found himself wanting her to do it.

"Whoa...Twilight, we've lived together for so long, and I never realized just how...delicious you were..."

"Oh no, the spell! No, stay back Spike! Somepony help!"

Twilight galloped down the hallway, panicked by the lustful, glazed over look Spike had on his face, directed at her.

"Twilight, come back here! I want you so badly!"

Spike took off down the hall after the purple unicorn.

The spell wore off later, when Spike had his hand on her rump, to which he recoiled and fell on his back. Princess Celestia had told him soon after that she should probably have dispelled the magic while he was in her chambers, but thought it would be more humorous to see what happened when she didn't. He also found out, at a later date, that this spell was actually a relatively easy thing for the princess to evade, given her own immense magical power, which is probably why Twilight had never used it after that. Damn...the princess could be a bit of a troll when the mood struck...

"Darn..." Spike thought in the present day bashfully, "the princess really got me that time...".

Spike threw some seasoning into the boiling pot of water. He decided on a healthy, hearty soup to present in three days. Something simple, fundamental, something Twilight would probably make if she were the one cooking. It would be strange if Spike gave the princess something with too much of a chef's flare, since Celestia already knew how great of a cook Spike was already, and could tell it was his doing, even if she were all the way in Canterlot.

He was broken out of his meditative reverie by a small knock on the door outside.

"Oh...guess I'd better get out there then."

Spike put the oven burner on low to make sure nothing bad happened this time, though it was just some seasoning, so he didn't really see much reason for alarm.

"COMING!" He yelled when the knocking became more frantic on the other side. He slipped over to the door and opened it lazily.

"Welcome to the OOF!"

Spike's mouth was covered by a little yellow hoof, obviously intending on keeping him from shouting his usual mantra to the entire world.

"Spike...it's me...Applebloom!"

She looked like she had just seen a ghost, and why was she whispering so much in the middle of the day?

"Oh hi Applebloom, any particular reason you want to keep me quiet?" Spike didn't know what was going on, though he did have a hunch...

"Oh sorry about that Spike, I just wanted to see if what they were saying was true."

Applebloom's eyes shifted back and forth as if she were going to be caught blabbing something she shouldn't. Spike was picking up on the undeniable feeling that this had to do with Twilight in some way.

"Is...is it true what they're saying about you, Spike? Are you completely off your rocker?"

Bingo...that sounded like Twilight spreading around vicious rumors about him alright. He had reasoned, last night, that she would know that he wanted the library all to himself, so that he wouldn't have Twilight around, watching him like he was her prey. So, she'd go around trying to get the whole town against him, or at least her friends, so that he'd have much more trouble being alone for too long, and not be able to get anything done. Did Twilight really give him so little credit? She must've thought he was daft or something. He was already onto her plans...

It was only logical that Twilight target Spike as her greatest threat. He was always the instigator of every scheme to deter her from completely ravaging the princess. Even the princess herself always seemed very nonchalant when it came to anything Twilight had ever almost done to her. One could only guess at why. Maybe she felt like it simply wasn't a threat to her well being, as she could probably fight off a hundred royal guards all on her own, and Twilight would've hardly made a dent. It's also equally possible the princess DIDN'T mind the attention, and simply let her do what she wanted out of some sense of thrill from knowing that she had such an influence on other ponies. Even more scary...and possibly a disastrous gamble on her part...she wanted Twilight to be murderously smitten with her... Spike wiped the thought from his head as if it had just sprouted legs and left him. There was no way that could be true...then again, anything was possible at this junction.

"Who told you all of that Applebloom?"

Applebloom spilled the scenario to the waiting purple dragon.

"I heard Applejack and Twilight talking about it! If half of what they said is true about you, then you're one sick dragon, Spike! Please tell me it ain't true!"

Spike decided to test the waters a little and made Applebloom be more specific.

"What HAVE Applejack and Twilight been saying about me, Applebloom?"

Applebloom animatedly acted out the very story that was relayed to her while she eavesdropped on her sister and friend.

"They said things like...you were hurting Twilight when you two were up in your bedroom alone, and doing the naked hug, but Twilight didn't want to, and you made Twilight tell you that you were her coltfriend not this other guy she was dating, and Twilight asked you not to do what you were going to do, and you were all like "too bad, I want to do the naked hug NOW!"

He was actually grateful that Applebloom had been the one to relay this new development to him. With Twilight's dementia, she was probably spreading around some kind of absurd "Spike raping Twilight" situation, and the details were probably much more gruesome than that. Yes, Twilight had indeed sunk to new lows in her current bid to foil Spike's plans. Seriously Twilight? Spreading around rumors that Spike was an abusive prick, and possibly convincing the other mares that he'd try the same with them if they let him? That's just sad, my little unicorn friend. You have a lot to learn about this little dragon, who has plenty of firepower up his sleeves to give you a run for your money.

"Well, believe it or not, Applebloom, I'm definitely NOT doing that to Twilight, nor do I intend to do anything of the sort to anypony."

Applebloom looked relieved, though her own childlike curiosity kept her skeptical of him.

"Why would Twilight lie about something like that? Either you're the liar, or she is, so which one is it?"

Spike went up to Applebloom with a warm, reassuring smile on his face, hoping to calm the young filly. He went up and spoke at a softer volume so that any potential spies would be none the wiser to what he was saying.

"Actually Applebloom, it's alright, Twilight and I are just playing a little game with each other, you know, to see who can get the other in the most trouble. Sure, it probably sounds like a game you wouldn't play with your friends, but Twilight and I have a very...different kind of friendship, one where we like to compete with each other in various sports or games. What's going on right now, and what will probably be going on for a few days, is just the both of us competing in this little contest we're having. Don't worry about it so much."

Applebloom didn't know who to believe, she wanted to trust both of them, but she almost trusted neither of them.

"Well...if you say it's just a game...then can I play too?"

Spike immediately tensed up.

"NO NO NO, this is a game for me and Twilight only. You see, we get kind of...rough with each other sometimes when we play. It's just the way our friendship works. I wouldn't want you to get hurt or be uncomfortable, you know?"

"...Oh...Okay, I see what you're saying Spike..."

Just then, the Spike got an idea...an awful idea...the Spike got a wonderful, awful idea... He inwardly smirked to himself.

"Just promise me one thing, Applebloom. No matter what I say or do from this point on, remember that I'm just playing around, and am trying to win this game of ours by any means necessary."

Spike looked a little too serious for Applebloom's liking. She was really afraid of his stare, expectant of some kind of affirmative feedback.

"Um...sure Spike, I'll just shrug it off..."

"Thank you Applebloom! I'm sorry, but I've gotta go back into the kitchen and watch over the dinner I'm preparing for a little while. Come back again sometime when you want to hang out."

"Okay, thanks Spike, I guess I'll be going now. I didn't have anything else to ask."

They waved "so long" to each other amiably, and Applebloom closed the door behind her on the way out.

Spike slowly slithered his way back into his kitchen with a reptilian glint in his eyes. The pot was still sitting on the stove, lukewarm from not boiling for half an hour, but Spike was just having too much fun with his thoughts.

"So Twilight, you want to fight dirty huh? Well, two can play at that game, my dear."

Spike chuckled menacingly to himself. It was almost too risky, what he was going to do after Twilight was done framing him for things that he hadn't done. He wasn't aware of ALL the details yet, but for this plan, he really didn't have to know. All he needed to do was play off of the accusations of those the unicorn had freaked out into believing whatever rape story she had been spreading around town.

"If they're expecting a possessive, abusive rapist, then that's what they're going to see from this point on. Twilight isn't the only one who has thought five steps ahead of her. I'll give her friends a show that they, and Twilight, will ingrain in their minds for years to come."

The purple pony didn't even realize the horrible mistake she had made in doing this. Demonizing Spike as some kind of criminal would only give him more time to himself to prepare his soup for the princess, not less. He could even act as a fugitive and run from town, to a far away place, where he could focus all of his energy on food preparation, and hatching his Twilight capturing plan, still in its infancy from all of the work he had to do earlier that day. That, however, would be later, as right now, it was time to keep up on his dish.

"I think it's about time to get this baby fired up again, and throw in the onions." Spike thought to himself conspiratorially.

A/N - Yeah, I'm not much of a chef myself, so I'm just going to make the soup as interesting as possible, without going into a lot of detail. Thanks again for the supportive words, and see you later!


	6. NewChapter 6

A/N - As stated before, I've cut the last two chapters (original 6 and 7) out of the story, as I feel they weren't that great, and in hindsight were rushed horribly. There is no more clop scene from the original sixth chapter, sorry to anyone who liked it, but I think the pacing of this chapter will make up for that. I still have the originals though, so if anyone wants to have those original chapters, just PM me or leave a request in the reviews, and I will put them back up into the story as "The Lost Chapters" or some other corny name like that. Bear in mind they will be quite different from this chapter (and those to come). Otherwise, this is a longer chapter than usual, partly to make up for my absence, but also because I wanted to get through the rest of the first day in this chapter. I'm planning on getting through everything a little faster, as not to have too much filler, so the style of this chapter is a little more "to the point", as it were, than the other chapters. Okay, enough of my talking, here's the new sixth chapter. I hope it's better than the original...

As every major store and building was decently situated around the central town plaza, Sugarcube Corner was not far off from the Carousel Boutique. Twilight's legs had been burning for some time, having been on her hooves more in the last few hours than she probably had for most of the week, but even she had to admit that, for being such a small town where one would expect farmland and fields for miles without deviation, Ponyville was incredibly packed together, and easy to navigate.

Twilight was already hard at "work" inside Sugarcube Corner, being conveniently empty of all ponies expect Pinkie Pie as the workload for the day was extremely mild, delivering her story to the excitable pink mare. Pinkie wasn't as quick to believe Twilight's graphic rape/torture scenes as Applejack and Rarity had taken her word for just a few short hours ago. Maybe the purple unicorn should've just stuck to the original stories, and not decided to start acting them out like she was at the Ponyville Dinner Theater. Although she wanted the stories to be as believable as possible, she was also starting to get a little off course in her attempts at further exaggerating the horrors Spike had done to her and her coltfriend.

"So let me get all of this straight, Twilight..." Pinkie Pie interjected as Twilight lay on the ground in a heap, with ketchup packet smears on her body where the blood was supposed to be from Spike's handiwork. She stared up at Pinkie Pie with a questioning look on her face.

"Spike choke-slammed your coltfriend into the ground," Pinkie Pie made the exact same motions and gestures the purple mare had made a few short seconds ago, "...and then started pounding into his face, over and over again, with his claws," more mimicking was made, "and then picked up your dining room table, breaking it over his head..."

Twilight just sat there with wide, almost guilty looking, eyes, but simply nodded to every statement with a calm confidence. Pinkie Pie continued in an even more dramatic and non-believing fashion.

"After all of this, you swear he wasn't knocked out or dead, right?"

Another nod was thrown her way. "...but he WAS in extreme pain, and had a broken leg and two black eyes from it..."

Pinkie Pie noted her friend's words, though was still suspicious.

"He comes over to you, and smacks you hard on the face, telling you to not move a muscle, or your coltfriend is dead meat. Then, that's when he...does all of that icky stuff to you?"

Twilight tried hard to understand what all of her friends were thinking, being the curious pony she was. Unfortunately, Pinkie Pie's face was an unreadable mix of confusion, compassion, and accusation that had her sweating a little. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. The others weren't this observant before, taking the unicorn's story at face value, and showing their condemnation of Spike's actions. She thought that of all the ponies, Pinkie Pie would be the most gullible of the five. This was not good at all.

Pinkie stared at her friend for what seemed like ages before immediately lightening up with a hearty giggle.

"Oh Twilight, your stories are always the best! I can't believe you would try to pull such a monster prank over me! I'm the queen of pranks, Twilight, you can't fool me!"

As Pinkie Pie giggled a little longer, more tickled by the thought of it being a prank than in disbelief that Twilight could make up such a creepy, horrendous tale about her assistant, Twilight was half-way between relieved that she wasn't calling her out and perturbed that the earth pony would be so tickled by something this morbid. Despite her initial urge to bolt from the bakery, she stood her ground firm and kept to her fearful and sorrow-filled features and speaking voice.

"Pinkie Pie, this is really not a joke! I'm being very serious here! Spike's done terrible things to me that no one should have to endure."

Pinkie Pie's bright smile faltered just a little as Twilight insisted on what had happened to her a few nights ago. However, she still wasn't quite ready to lower her guard just yet.

"Oh come on, Twilight, Spike choke-slams your coltfriend, somepony probably twice his size, and makes a sizable crater in a hardwood floor from it? Admit it, you're trying to pull one over on me."

She continued to chuckle from Twilight's convincing facial message, yet her story was still entirely unbelievable, which just made Pinkie Pie laugh more.

"I'm telling you, Pinkie, this has definitely happened, more than once, and it's starting to tear everything apart!"

Twilight was running low on tear duct reserves, having almost exhausted them with the last two mares she had tricked that day. Nevertheless, she gave everything she had to make tears stream down her face more than before, putting her hooves over her eyes and making some mewling whimpers for added effect.

Now Pinkie Pie had to pause for a moment. She had never seen Twilight so upset over anything before. Soon, her own smile started its descent into a sad frown.

"Oh...I'm sorry Twilight, I didn't think it was really that bad. It's just...Spike doesn't seem like he's even capable of something like that!"

She went over and wrapped a front leg and hoof around Twilight's shoulder, trying her best to comfort her, though feeling very awkward in the face of so much anguish. Her eyes uncomfortably scanned the room as her friend wept into her shoulder. Luckily, there were no ponies present right now to gawk at the meltdown Twilight was experiencing. Pinkie Pie didn't deal with sadness very well, and she was determined to find any way to make the bookpony stop crying and be happy again.

"I'VE GOT IT!" Pinkie Pie's face was brighter in a nanosecond, "Come on, Twilight, let's go on over to the library and talk to him about it. I'm sure he'll see things our way if we explain that he's hurting you, and he'll realize what he's done and be his cutesy wutsey self again in no time!"

Pinkie Pie was always quick when it came to finding ways to resolve tense situations. Unfortunately for Twilight, the pink pony was bouncing at a brisk pace toward the door to the outside. She sat up and bolted to get between the two. Her fore-hooves were stretched on both sides of the door and she took a stance that she hoped would be immovable.

"No Pinkie, we can't do that!"

Pinkie's face became a mask of confusion yet again. Twilight had been a wreck on the floor just a moment ago, but now here she was, blocking the way with an imperceptible, wide-eyed glare that even the rambunctious mare could tell was quite unlike the unicorn.

"What's wrong, Twilight, I thought it was a pretty good idea."

When Twilight finally took stock of the weird grimace on Pinkie Pie's face, she realized that she must've been freaking the hay out of her, and she gave her friend a warmer stare while still trying to keep her from going out and ruining her plan.

"Well...it's just that I'm not so sure how Spike would react if you went over and confronted him about it. He's been really ill-tempered and I don't want anything bad happening to you because of what I said."

Pinkie was still trying to see and reach over the purple pony to get through the door.

"Don't be silly, Twilight, it'll be fine! It's not like Spike's going to beat me up or anything. He'll come around to what we have to say, no problem!"

Twilight was practically neck and neck with the party girl as she insisted, through body language, that nopony was going anywhere until she was heard out.

"You do remember me telling you that Spike thinks you're a part of his harem too, right? Don't think that he wouldn't get rough with you if he felt like you were threatening him."

Pinkie let up for only a brief moment to absorb the thought.

"We have to do something to keep him from being a meanie though. What would you have us do instead Twilight?"

Pinkie gave her an optimistic look as Twilight breathed out a tiny sigh of relief. It looked like she would get to speak after all.

"Well, I'm still trying to think through that one right now. Trust me Pinkie, this is going to be much more effective than trying to talk through the problem. Just wait for a little while, and I'll let you know when the time is right to confront him about this, alright?"

Pinkie grinned slightly at the unicorn's vagueness, and she excitedly jumped.

"I see what you're doing now, Twilight! It's a surprise, isn't it?"

Twilight's face curled up into the most forced, awkward smile that one could muster as she nervously affirmed Pinkie's conjecture.

"Right, it's a surprise! Wouldn't want to go blabbing about it now, would I?"

Pinkie was pretty revved up over this. While Twilight was grateful that the pink mare didn't press the absence of a concrete strategy too much, she was also a little too enthused about the whole ordeal as well.

"Oh boy, a surprise," Pinkie mulled to herself for a moment, "I've gotta let Rainbow Dash know about it too!"

"Pinkie! It's supposed to be..."

Somehow by some unknown force of nature, Pinkie slipped under Twilight's side and burst through her door with a speed that would make a sports car proud. The purple mage was baffled by how easily she slid through the tiny space. She could bring to mind many laws of physics that had just been destroyed by the display of elasticity.

"...a surprise..."

Oh well, Twilight was going to tell Rainbow Dash about it soon, and with Pinkie's help, she would get the word out to all of her friends by sundown. Pinkie probably wouldn't have the same dramatic effect on Rainbow Dash that Twilight would've attempted on her, but the pegasus wasn't really one for drama and sob stories anyway. It made her work all the more easy. She decided to run into the bathroom quickly so that she could wipe off the ketchup from various parts of her body, and to brush out the kinks in her mane and tail from rolling around on the floor so much.

As she did so, she thought about what Spike was probably doing at this very moment. She wasn't entirely sure as to what he was scheming, but it had to be something of significance to keep her at bay. Her friends were starting to line up on her side, one by one, and she took solace in the fact that whatever Spike was thinking about or doing right now, it wouldn't be enough before the "intervention" was staged and he was kept in captivity until after she and her precious princess were reunited once again.

She smiled into the mirror with a deranged sense of satisfaction, "Let's see what you've got now Spike..."

* * *

><p>With the steady amount of free time Spike had accumulated, he was hard at work looking through various cookbooks to use as a foundation for his dish. Unfortunately, the more Spike skimmed the books, the more obvious his next predicament was to him.<p>

"...It's already been done so many times before! I can't find anything that I could legitimately pass off as a decent excuse to bother the princess with!"

Spike frustratedly threw the tome on top of the other ones in an organized fashion, as spilling them all over the place would create more work to cover up his tracks later. The recipes were certainly different from each other, but the premise of all of them was the same. He would have to take boiling water, vegetables, spices, sometimes rice or other starchy things like potatoes, and mix them all together. Spike was looking for something fairly simple, but this was just ridiculous.

"This isn't going to work out as well as I had hoped."

Spike sat in his seat for a moment with a hard scowl on his face. At this point, he couldn't afford to lose any time on preparations, and he was afraid he would have to switch to something else to make, thereby having to waste more valuable minutes scanning through other cookbooks, getting ever closer to the fated day.

He curiously took in the kitchen in front of his eyes, looking for other things that might do well in some kind of soup. He spotted two cinnamon sticks in a container and immediately gagged.

"Blech...cinnamon in a soup? That would be nasty with all of the other stuff in it."

He disregarded them for a moment to get up out of his seat and raid the cupboards for ideas. He found a half-eaten chocolate bar melting slightly into one of them. He never really ate chocolate that much, preferring the taste of a diamond or ruby much more.

"Eww, this looks like it's been sitting there for weeks..."

There was also a bottle of vanilla extract and a bag of sugar. The gears in Spike's head started cranking after a few more minutes of searching. He had a great idea.

"I haven't seen anypony make a dessert soup in a long time. Actually, I don't even know if I've ever seen it before in my life. That's something I could really get behind!"

He made an "it's so obvious" gesture to himself as he thought of all of the ingredients that he already had in the kitchen for a dessert soup. Sure, HE didn't eat the same sweets ponies ate all of the time, and mostly preferred gems, but others seemed to really like this stuff a lot, and he knew he could stir up a good amount of hype for it to Celestia, enough that this might be what he needed to do it. It would at least be a more feasible idea than the alternatives.

"Awesome! Now I can get the culinary juices flowing again!"

He also realized that he had left the luke warm pot of onions and seasoning on the stove. Oh well, might as well not waste it. He'll just make something with it for dinner tonight instead. Before he started on this dessert soup, he would have to come up with a recipe for it first, which he was confident in as well.

"Alright...let's get going then. One swiftly prepared, sweet soup coming right up!"

* * *

><p>Pinkie Pie bounced excitedly through a field outside of Ponyville where she knew Rainbow Dash would probably be sleeping on some cloud or tree somewhere. It was starting to get a little later in the day as the sun was beginning a clear descent into the horizon and most of the clouds from the earlier morning had given way to the blue sky, perfect time and weather for a power nap. As Rainbow Dash often boasted, she had cleared the afternoon weather up in a breeze and always had plenty of time for rest. She was hardly lazy by any stretch of the imagination. Everypony just thought that Rainbow Dash did nothing but sleep all day. Little did they know that mere moments before her trips to dream-land, she would change the weather in an instant. Fast wasn't a strong enough adjective to describe it.<p>

Sure enough, the pink pony eyed the one cloud that was conspicuously drifting through the sunny field. Rainbow Dash wasn't one for subtlety, that's for sure. The weather patrol could have sent an inspector to check that every piece of sky debris was taken care of, and Rainbow Dash would still be seen sleeping, out for everypony to see. One of these days, she was going to get fired for it.

"OH RAINBOW DASH?" Pinkie Pie cheerily called for the sleeping pegasus.

"WHOA!"

Her hoof-steps had gone undetected by the blissfully dozing mare, and when the loud sound surrounded her ears like a thunderclap, Rainbow Dash instinctively flopped out and landed on her hooves a few feet away from Pinkie.

"Geez Pinkie, don't sneak up on ponies like that! You really sc..." She stopped her admonishment mid-sentence.

"Scratch that, I wasn't scared or anything!" Rainbow Dash threw her front legs around the back of her head with a show of bravado while she hovered close to the ground, still slightly red around the face from her heart being jump-started into the waking world. Pinkie Pie just laughed it off as one of her friend's eccentricities.

"Oh Dash, you're so silly sometimes!"

"Anyway..." Rainbow Dash came back to the ground to query her friend, "What are you doing out here Pinkie Pie? I thought you'd be working over at Sugarcube Corner right now."

Good point. Pinkie Pie, in her excited rush, had completely forgotten that Mr. and Mrs. Cake were out running some sort of errand for a client. Then again, they did say that they'd only be out for half an hour or less, and with the time she used up with Twilight, they would be back in about ten minutes. That's right, Twilight was there too, so hopefully everything turned out okay. She might get a stern talking-to when she got home, but the information Twilight had given her just couldn't wait to get out to the rest of their friends. Better to tell Rainbow Dash than to get too wound up and spill it to a stranger (or the Cakes) accidentally, right?

"Oh yeah, Dash, there is something that I've absolutely got to tell you!"

Pinkie was buzzing to get the story out to her. Rainbow Dash was a little perturbed by Pinkie's wide-eyed stare, and she could only guess as to what this "something" was.

"Okay, what is it, Pinkie?"

The next few minutes were quite busy, as Pinkie told Dash about Spike's jealousy of this supposed "coltfriend" that Twilight had somehow met under the noses of everypony in town. She acted out every scene exactly as Twilight had done so a few hours before. All the while, Dash's mouth was hanging open in shock, disbelief, and a strange sense of competitiveness when Pinkie informed her that Spike saw Dash as a part of HIS harem. Dash wasn't the property of any colt! If anything, Spike was a part of her's, not the other way around, though the thought of that was pretty odd. Pinkie was rambling so fast at times that even she was having trouble keeping up with her. Moreover, her choice of expletives when acting as Spike in these twisted scenes were something that Dash would've never expected to hear out of the seemingly innocent, pink mare's mouth.

Soon, Pinkie Pie's stories came to a close, and she was, surprisingly, winded by the whole thing. It did feel a lot better to get all of that off of her chest, but the look in Dash's eyes was indicative that she was still pretty confused about the entire situation.

"Whoa, whoa, hold up for a moment here!" Dash spoke up when she realized that nothing else would spontaneously spew from Pinkie Pie again, "So, Twilight actually has a coltfriend that nopony else even knew about before hand?"

"I know, isn't that the weirdest thing?" Pinkie Pie looked poised for another five minute ramble fest, "Twilight always seemed like the kind of mare who would be...well...you know...not into that sort of thing!"

Dash stopped her again as fast as she could.

"No, no, Pinkie, that's not the part I'm freaked out by."

"There's a lot to be worried about Dash, what part are you talking about?"

Dash took another breath as her lungs felt a little trapped from the influx of creepiness in all of this.

"Spike's got a lot of nerve doing all of those things to Twilight!"

"You're right Dash," Pinkie Pie started to say, "it's absolutely, positively, indubitably horri..."

Dash cut in with another thought.

"...and acting like I'm some kind of sex toy for him! Spike's harem, my flank!"

Pinkie let her thoughts sit on her tongue. She was, for once, blind-sided by the random comment from all the way out of left-field. Was Dash seriously that concerned about this? She arched an eyebrow at Dash for a bit as she continued.

"Wait until I get my hooves on him! He doesn't know who he's messing with! Why, I would so take him for the ride of his life. I could totally wreck his junk..."

"Um...," Pinkie stepped in to calm the angry pegasus, who was getting a little too sexually descriptive for Pinkie Pie's comfort, "...Dash...you okay over there?..."

Dash whipped around, standing on her back legs and clenching her front hooves to her chest. Pinkie's perplexed expression brought her back to reality. Sheepishly, she used a fore-hoof to brush down her multi-colored mane, resting on all fours, clearing her throat in an embarrassed, shifty-eyed grin to assure the pink pony that she was indeed "okay".

"Oh...um...yeah. I guess I got a little...carried away for a minute (ahem) (ahem)."

Pinkie's arched eyebrow expression went away after Dash regained her bearings.

"So...I guess Twilight wants us to wait for her to come up with some kind of plan to deal with Spike," Pinkie told Rainbow Dash in her usual, more lively voice.

"Wait?"

The verb "wait" wasn't in the pegasus' vocabulary. She never waited to do anything. When action was called for, she was always the first one out on the track. One would be hard pressed to find a more uninspiring, unappealing concept in her opinion.

"Come on Pinkie, we've got to nip this in the bud while we still can! I'll go on ahead and confront him. You can be the back-up on the teeny, tiny off chance that I can't handle the little guy myself, though I doubt I won't be able to."

Pinkie Pie wasn't even given a moment to voice her own dissent, as Rainbow Dash flew off like a rocket toward the Ponyville Library, determined to teach that little punk a lesson he wouldn't forget for injuring Twilight, not to mention claiming Dash as his plaything.

Pinkie Pie thought to herself a moment while beginning her trek back to her bakery home, "...Oops, I guess I should've known that Dash wouldn't want to sit around for long. What am I saying? This is Rainbow Dash we're talking about. She can be pretty heated, but she won't do anything that bad to Spike, I just know it."

Even so, she couldn't shake the tiny feeling that something bad could possibly happen. She tried to ignore it and trust her friend as much as she could. Everything would turn out alright in the end, or so she certainly hoped.

"As for me, I'm going to trust Twilight too, and be more patient."

* * *

><p>Of course, if everypony knew of the frayed mind housed within Twilight's skull, they would be more wise not to trust her judgement. She was still a little flustered after the near-failure she had with Pinkie Pie, not being as convinced as Twilight would've wished, but all in all, she had decided to trust her...<p>

"Just like a good friend should..." Twilight cackled inwardly, still trying to keep as low a profile as possible with the town, though she probably couldn't after her earlier laughing outburst a while ago. Hopefully the other ponies out and about, going home after a long day of work, or just arriving to the stores and shops before they close for the night, wouldn't have heard it, or at least have brushed it aside as an isolated incident.

Enough of the town though, there were no other friends there that needed to be told about this. Her last stop for the night before she returned home was the quiet, meek yellow pegasus that lived on the outskirts of Ponyville, Fluttershy.

Even for a pony as love-driven and determined as Twilight, the day's events had inevitably taken a physical toll on her body. As the sun descended further into the horizon, her fatigue was grinding down her last bits of energy.

"Ugh...I can't wait to get all of this over with. Trying to convince your friends that another one of your friends is a dirty, rotten monstrosity makes one very tired."

She imagined that her eyes were starting to become a tad bloodshot as she willed them to stay open, just for a little while longer. While she wasn't really that thrilled with the thought of scaring the poor filly, of whom was undoubtedly the most sensitive to bad news like this of all of them, she couldn't stop now. It was all coming together so seamlessly, too seamlessly when she gave it an iota of analysis. She was doing this for the princess, and no one, and she meant NO ONE, would mess it up for her.

The unicorn, wrapped up in her thoughts, failed to notice that her friend's cottage was mere yards away from her standing position.

"Oh, it looks like I made it..."

She saw Fluttershy over on the side of the house, tending to some of the mice who inhabited it. She was always the kindest of the six. Anypony else would've screamed in terror and called pest control if they were aware of the little mammals rummaging around their own houses. She just couldn't say no to anypony, a claim that Twilight was counting on now more than ever. As she hid behind a nearby tree for a moment, she gave herself another pep talk.

"Okay...this is the last one. Just stay calm, and give it to her straight. I'd better tone it down from when I told Pinkie. Acting it out was a horrible idea, and it'll be more believable if I don't."

Meanwhile, Fluttershy was giggling while she spoke with her two mouse friends. How she could understand them and their language was anypony's guess...

"Ha ha, alright Mr. Mouse, I've gotta get back to work on the rest of the gardening tonight, but I would love to talk with you two again tomorrow if you would like. Bye-bye!"

Fluttershy casually waved the two critters off with a smile before turning around to do the rest of the evening's chores. As she turned around, she noticed a glimpse of a purple striped tail sticking out from behind one of the trees in front of her house. She gasped with a heightened sense of surprise, but also with a tingle of fear coursing through her spine.

"(Gasp)...oh no...it's Twilight! Spike warned me about what's going on with her right now..."

As the tail flicked a bit at the edge of her sight, Fluttershy tried to stand fast without getting scared and running off. It took every ounce of the tiny supply of courage she had to quell her anxiety at what Twilight might possibly say or do to her, worse still...if she found out that she knew...

She turned her head in the opposite direction in a snap when the face behind the tree finally emerged. Oh please let Twilight think that she isn't trying to avoid or ignore her!

"Hi there, Fluttershy," the purple unicorn sweetly called out to the pegasus.

"EEP!" Fluttershy held a wing up to her mouth when she jumped, the voice of Twilight held some haunting tone to it. It wasn't extremely noticeable, but given the conversation with Spike many hours ago, there was certainly a dark echo, as if she were possessed, and very well could be.

If Twilight knew that Fluttershy was behaving strangely, she didn't show it on her face. To Fluttershy's credit, being jumpy and quick to squeaking were things that most of Ponyville already expected out of her. It was the best cover in the world.

"What's wrong, Fluttershy? You look like you've just seen a ghost."

Fluttershy turned toward the purple pony slowly. Now that she had a good view of Twilight's face, coming ever so close, the tired and pale countenance did look incredulously like that of a specter...

"Um..." Fluttershy started, trying to make up an excuse, "Oh no Twilight...I was just...startled, that's all..."

Pretty lame excuse, but luckily for the yellow mare, Twilight bought into it with an understanding "oh, okay". That was all she had to say to put the potentially dangerous unicorn's mind at ease for the moment.

"So...uh...is there something I might be able to help you with, Twilight?..." Fluttershy was uncomfortable being too close to her friend, but she started gaining a little confidence as it looked like Twilight had little to no suspicions that Fluttershy knew anything that was going on at the moment.

"Now that you mention it, I do have something to tell you about. Be warned though, it's probably going to be quite disturbing..."

Fluttershy wondered beyond wonder what Twilight could possibly have to say to her this close to dusk. She gave her undivided attention as the unicorn began the sick tale of "Spike: The Rapist".

"If it's something you need my help with...I'll try to bear it, Twilight."

Twilight gave her the run down, starting with her newly acquired coltfriend that all of her friends had heard about. The difference here was that Fluttershy was fairly up to date already on her obsession with Princess Celestia, and the untold horrors she committed in the name of love that Spike had mentioned.

Fluttershy mused to herself during her story, "Wow...Twilight really is trying to convince everypony that she's not head over hooves for the princess. I wonder how many others she's told believe this."

"Fluttershy, are you still listening," Twilight was looking a little puzzled at the yellow pegasus' expression, which seemed distant and detached.

"Oh...yes Twilight...I am!" Fluttershy responded quickly to avoid trouble with her.

"I was asking you if you thought that it was weird that everypony else was shocked that I had a coltfriend?"

She didn't like the dubious look in Twilight's eyes as she had totally missed the last question.

"...O...Oh...well...it IS a teeny, tiny bit...surprising...heh heh."

The unicorn's reaction told Fluttershy that that might have not been the best answer she could give.

"I MEAN...ahhhm..."

"Don't worry about it, Fluttershy, if everypony else was concerned about it, maybe there really is some truth to it."

She dared not take a sigh of relief in front of the purple mare, but Fluttershy was thankful that Twilight seemed so dismissive of any oddities in her behavior, probably because she was trying to fabricate lies of her own.

Twilight continued on with the parts where Spike was beating the poor stallion up, and doing multiple lewd, and unnecessarily violent acts on Twilight. She had hardly even told Fluttershy about her coltfriend getting pummeled to a paste before the shy filly was curled up on the wall of her house, starring into Twilight's eyes with a green, nauseous tint in her cheeks.

As Angel happened by, wondering why the hell dinner hadn't been served yet, Fluttershy grappled onto the furry little guy and had him in a near death grip. Unable to free himself from his annoying master, he also had to hear what Twilight was proposing Spike had done. Too bad he could understand every word perfectly...

"Oh sorry, Angel, I..." When Fluttershy's hold on the bunny let up a fraction, Angel wrestled out the rest of the way and sprinted back inside fearfully, indicating that there were indeed some screwed up tales coming from Twilight's diseased mind.

"Oh, sweet Celestia," Fluttershy made another internal dialogue while Twilight was finishing up, "What kind of depraved things has Twilight been telling ponies about Spike? This is unthinkable!"

Twilight looked poised to pass out. She was already pretty tired before the speech, but telling it over again was pretty taxing.

"So...that's what's been going on, Fluttershy. We've gotta try to do everything we can to help Spike through these issues, or else he could possibly hurt us all!"

Luckily, Fluttershy had the terrified, sickly pale color to show her disgust. Otherwise, she might not have reacted convincingly enough with what she knew about Twilight's fixation already.

"So...uh...what are you going to do about him then, Twilight?"

Twilight was just as fearful of being called out as the pegasus. She had lucked out once again.

"I'm going to stage an intervention tomorrow, and get Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and you together to help me detain Spike, preferably out here near the Everfree Forest, where he won't be a danger to anyone else. We may have to keep him here for a long time, so I really wanted to get your approval first. So...are you going to help us then, Fluttershy?"

That was all she needed to hear to warn Spike of the impending danger. As much as she wanted to say "no" to her, she couldn't afford an extended hospital visit either.

"Yes Twilight, I would like to help you with this. I think Spike could recover faster if he had somepony to show him some understanding and kindness."

"That is good to know, Fluttershy. Thank you very much. I need to get back to the library before Spike suspects anything, but tomorrow we'll get together and stop this once and for all."

Twilight slowly trudged away from the cottage as she waved her last friend off for the night. Fluttershy did the same, with an obviously forced smile, but the mage didn't even notice it and just kept on walking. Once Fluttershy knew that she was out of earshot, she whispered to herself.

"I'll have to warn Spike early in the morning. Hopefully Twilight will be gone by then, and I won't be too late..."

* * *

><p>"Oh yeah...this is starting to taste good!"<p>

Spike was taste testing the experimental dessert soup he was going to use for the presentation.

"I knew that putting in chocolate sauce and cinnamon would be passable, but I think the little chunks of strawberry give it some substance without being overbearing."

A resounding slam came from the library lobby and quickly paced hooves could be heard getting closer to the kitchen.

"GOOD GRAVY IT'S TWILIGHT!"

Spike threw a lid on the still simmering pot of sweet soup. He opened up one of the cabinets to the bottom left of the stove in a frenzy, grabbing the incredibly hot pot in his claws.

"AAACK!" He tried to scream as quietly as possible. No time for oven mitts. He all but threw the steel container and slammed the door on the cupboard. In one, swift motion, every ingredient that was currently being utilized on the counter he shoved forcefully into a burlap sack and did a half-ass job of tying it up, throwing it into another close cabinet like his life depended on it (and it did).

"SPIKE!" A furious, female voice roared into the kitchen from the doorway.

"I SWEAR TWILIGHT, I WAS JUST GETTING DINNER..."

Spike turned around slowly, hoping the pitch of the voice he heard was a sign that Twilight was not actually home.

"...READY..."

The voice had not been Twilight, but was an angry looking Rainbow Dash. What could she possibly need from a library at near nightfall?

"Oh...uh...hi Rainbow Dash...what's up?..."

"DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH ME, SPIKE!"

Rainbow Dash came ever closer to the dragon, a menacing glare was bolted to her face, and she looked ready to strike at him if he made any sudden moves.

"I know what you've been doing to Twilight!"

Spike backed away from the pegasus with a confused, cautious balance. Holy shit, Twilight must have really been laying on the abuse if the usually so casual Rainbow Dash was this heated over it. The reptile hadn't planned on confronting anypony tonight, since Twilight wouldn't possibly have been able to visit and explain it to every one of their friends in the span of less than a day. He would end up having to use his "abusive Spike" strategy later, when his newly formed idea could really take root.

"And...uh...what would that be, Dash?"

Rainbow Dash wasn't letting up at all. The little twerp was trying to play the innocent bystander? Well, she'd make him think twice before hurting Twilight, or thinking of her as a part of his twisted harem.

"You know what you did! So, you like molesting defenseless mares while beating up their coltfriends, huh? Well, how about you try me on for size, Spike!"

Spike sweated a little as she nearly backed him into the wall.

"So what Apple Bloom said was true then...WAIT...WHAT ARE YOU SUGGESTING DASH?"

Rainbow Dash was riding an adrenaline induced high, and she was definitely ready to give Twilight's assistant a beat-down he wouldn't soon forget.

"You heard me, you want to molest somepony, then just try me, or do you only rape the helpless, innocent ones?"

"..." Spike mulled that over in his head, "...Twilight isn't exactly somepony I'd call helpless and innocent..."

"Rainbow Dash, I'm telling you, right now, I have never done, nor do I ever intend on doing, anything that disgusting to Twilight, you, or any other pony for that matter!"

She didn't believe him for one second. Of course he'd try to fake his way out of it, like the little creep he was.

"Oh no you don't, Spike! Pinkie Pie gave me the entire message, from Twilight's mouth. You've gotten away with raping Twilight for far too long, and now I'm going to set things straight, starting with your jaw..."

Rainbow Dash hovered over the table that Spike was using as a shield to keep her away from him and pounced with enough force that a resounding clack was heard through the little room as her hooves touched down. Luckily, Spike had avoided it, and he rushed out of the kitchen while trying to calm the blue pegasus.

"Come on, Dash! You know I'd never do something like that, I'm serious!"

"Yeah," Dash started condescendingly, "that's what they all say, you little squirt!"

Although Dash was faster on her hooves than Spike on his stumpy legs, Spike was much smaller, and whenever she charged at him around the lobby, full force, Spike would, at the very last moment, duck or side-step out of the way, sending Dash smacking into bookshelves and ill-placed statues that would have to be put back up when Twilight returned. At this point, Spike hoped she wouldn't be back for quite a while.

"(Coughing)...you're crafty Spike, I'll give you that, but I'm going to get you, and when I do...oh...you don't want to know what I'll do to you!"

The mare didn't know exactly what she'd do when she got him, having not planned that far ahead yet, but she couldn't just let Spike off without some kind of punishment.

"Just chill out, Dash! There's no way I could do any of those things, I'm, like, half the size of Twilight, and she can use magic, and...WHOA!"

Spike barely got a headbutt, courtesy of the angry pony, when he leaped out of the way within an inch of his life. A resounding thud vibrated through the towering bookcase, already wobbly and weighted from the tons of hard-back books Twilight and Spike kept in it. An ominous shadow began to take shape around Dash and Spike.

"OUCH, WHAT THE..."

"D-D-D-Dash...we might want to get out of the way..."

Books of all types and thickness rained down on the dragon and pegasus. The first few landed squarely on their heads, disorienting them to the point that they could not get out of the way in time.

CRASH CRASH CRASH, DONK DONK DONK DONK

A large dust cloud flew around the library, indicating the books' amount of usage in the past few months, or years for some of them. It took a moment for it to settle, and in the wreckage, Spike had somehow been buried legs-up and sticking out of the pile. Dash, having been right in the middle of the avalanche, was buried all the way in.

The first to register what had happened and revive was Dash.

"Uuuuugh...okay...I think I'm okay..." Dash dazedly rubbed her forehead with a hoof gingerly as she drilled out of the mountain of tomes, not wanting to give herself more of a headache than she already had.

"Wait a second." Dash noticed a piece of paper out of the corner of her eye. Since it was on top of the pile, somepony must have buried it into the unreachable top shelves of the case. It was curious, since why would a lone piece of paper be sitting up there when otherwise there were nothing but hard-back volumes in that row?

Dash picked up the seemingly innocent parchment with her teeth and set it out in front of her, with the contents of said paper facing her.

"W...whuh...what the hay am I looking at?"

Dash's face was contorted in a mix of queasiness and distaste when she realized what was scribbled out on the document in front of her. The picture at the end was hideous, but first, there was a letter for the princess on the top. She read on, slightly confused by what she saw:

- DEAR PRINCESS CELESTIA -

Okay, I don't think Spike is at home right now...

Oh princess, I wish I could send each and every one of these private letters to you, but my annoying little assistant has the tendency to keep us apart as much as he can. I just wanted to let you know that I wish I was back in Canterlot, so that I could make all of your romantic fantasies come true. I know, you're probably telling yourself, "Geez, Twilight, that's the three-hundredth time this week that you've told me!", but I just can't help it, Princess. I would like nothing more than to take you on the couch of this library, and scream my love for you as we both reach climax. I don't even care who hears! Spike could be in the next room for all I care. Everypony I know could be in the room at the time, and it wouldn't matter!

Don't worry Princess, I'll find a way. I'll find a way to make it so that I'm never apart from you again, even if I have to sacrifice everything to make it so! For now, I must request that you hold on, so that I can find an appropriate moment to consider a plan. I have drawn you a picture to tide you over, so that my absence is just a tiny bit more bearable.

- LOVE, YOUR FAITHFUL STUDENT, TWILIGHT SPARKLE XOXOXO -

All Rainbow Dash had to do was shift her gaze down a notch to bring all of the perplexed sickness back into her stomach. On the bottom left was one of those hearts with an arrow in it. Inside was written "T.S. (heart) P.C.". She looked to the bottom right and she almost hurled.

It was a drawing more like a five-year-old might create, a five-year-old with no sense of perspective. It seemed very hastily drawn, probably to hide it fast. The bunch of shapes Dash assumed were Twilight was on top of the ones that were supposed to be Princess Celestia, and it looked like she was trying to...

Dash turned it over as fast as she could, trying to block out the mental image. She turned her neck over to where Spike's legs were still protruding from the book pile, and climbed out further to get some answers from him.

"Yo, wake up, Spike!"

She clenched her teeth as softly as she could around his tail without losing her grip. Fortunately, he wasn't buried too far in, and slid out effortlessly. Dash proceeded to use her wings to lightly smack his face, worriedly trying to wake him up as soon as possible.

"Get up!"

Spike's face scrunched up in annoyance as he felt the feathery yet solid appendages beat on him.

"What...erm...what happened?"

When he opened his eyes, Rainbow Dash was standing over him dominantly, though with much less anger and intent to kill.

"AAAAAH!"

"No, no, I'm not mad at you anymore, Spike, at least...not if I get some information out of you as to what the heck THIS is."

Spike was still a little fuzzy from being conked on the head, but with a few squints, the piece of paper Dash was trying to hold in her teeth became clearer.

"OH...where did you find this, Dash?"

"It was on top of all the books when I came to. I think it was up on the top shelf before it fell."

She waited until Spike had scanned the whole thing to make another statement. She knew when Spike's eyes wandered down the page and his tongue lolled out disgustedly.

"What's going on here, Spike? I thought Twilight had a coltfriend she was seeing. Why is she writing nasty love letters to the princess and not sending them?"

Spike stood up after taking a deep breath, both in relief and to get some oxygen through his body after being unconscious.

"I guess the secret's out, once again," Spike said somewhat sarcastically. Twilight found some creative ways to disguise these hidden letters, but lately it seems like more of them were coming out of the wood work...quite literally in fact. It must have been a sign of her steadily deteriorating mental health.

"Dash...what I'm about to tell you...you can't repeat to anypony you know, not your friends, your boss, nor even to the princesses themselves, you got that?"

The athletic pegasus apprehensively nodded, scared of just what Spike was getting at here.

Spike gave his side of the gruesome story; how Twilight had pined for Celestia for as long as Spike could remember, how she had tried numerous times to accost and, for all intents and purposes, molest the princess, and more urgently, how she was now trapped in that mentality, and was spreading lies about Spike to keep him from stopping her.

Dash didn't know who to believe. She loved and trusted Twilight like she were her own sister, but she didn't want to completely dismiss Spike either, as he proved to be just as trustworthy as the unicorn had ever been. However, the evidence against Twilight was tangible in her hooves. As for Spike, he had shown no outward signs of abusing or hurting anypony since he arrived here with his mentor, at least not enough to warrant any kind of suspicion.

"So...if I WERE to believe you, instead of Twilight, is there anypony else who knows about her problems?"

"I've only discussed it with Fluttershy, who kind of...came to a similar conclusion on her own, since she had talked with Twilight and seen her do some odd things."

So, Fluttershy was trusting of Spike also? Now it was difficult to tell which one was telling the real story, since she might have thought Spike would be the only one to have those feelings, and thus be a less credible source of information. Then again, Twilight was spreading a similar story on her own, that nopony, except this...elusive coltfriend, knew either.

"Well...maybe I'll talk to Fluttershy about it first then... After that, I'll see who I can believe more..."

It was getting late, and Rainbow Dash wanted to ask Fluttershy about this as soon as possible. She wasn't going to bed yet, but she didn't want to wait until the yellow pony did to ask her either. She trotted toward the door quickly.

"Sorry about trying to beat you up back there, Spike, I didn't know that this was all happening behind everyponys' backs."

"Don't worry, Dash, it's water under the bridge."

Rainbow Dash unfurled her wings as she walked outside, giving an appreciative nod to the dragon. She flew back into the evening sun toward the shy pegasus' cottage. She would need more information before trusting either one of them now.

Spike glanced back at the huge mess that had been made of the library, and his eyes widened in horror.

"Wait, who's going to help me clean up in here?"

The silence of the library gave him his answer. He face-palmed himself for not getting Rainbow Dash to stay for a few more minutes. Though, in all honesty, the revved-up pony probably wouldn't have wanted to clean up with him anyway.

* * *

><p>It was completely dark now, had been for an hour or so. Spike had finally put back every book in the proper place, got rid of the dust, realigned every statue, and in essence, made the library look like no incident had happened at all.<p>

"Phew...Twilight will probably be home soon, can't let her suspect anything!"

Dinner was hastily thrown together earlier that evening, since the day had ended up being somewhat action-packed, more so than Spike would have liked it to be. That might be a little suspicious to the purple magician, but otherwise, nothing was out of order. It was good for Spike that, when Rainbow Dash came and after she had been there, no other patrons came through the door. Though, at night it was usually like that, and Spike turned the "closed" sign over at some point, which was perfectly within his power at the time.

Spike was still in the kitchen, putting the finishing touches on his and her daffodil sandwiches, when...

CLICK...CLACK CLOP CLOP

There she was. He was surprised that she had stayed out that long. Surely their pony friends didn't live that far apart from each other. Then again, Spike had never even tried to visit them all in one day, assuming that he would be incredibly exhausted to the point of his legs breaking out from under him.

Twilight plopped down on the red couch they kept in the lobby and sighed appreciatively as she sat down after a few hours of ceaseless walking.

"Hey there, Twilight..." Spike spoke from the kitchen door with a strained grin, "you must've been pretty popular today, being out for so long and looking as tired as you are."

"Ugh...it HAS been a long day, Spike. I decided that you could probably handle the library yourself, so I wanted to visit everypony I could and catch up a little on the news going around town. I must say I learned a lot today!"

Spike knitted his non-existent brows inwardly, "I bet you did..."

"Dinner's ready if you're feeling up to it, Twilight."

With as tired as she was, Twilight still couldn't resist the offer. She had hardly eaten at all, utilizing her time wisely to turn all of her friends against the purple dragon in one day. There were only two days left until the princess made her appearance, after all, and Spike needed to be as far away as possible when she did come.

"That sounds great, Spike, I'm famished!"

Spike walked back into the kitchen to give Twilight some room to get into the doorway when she got up a few seconds later.

"So, what has my number one assistant and resident chef cooked up tonight?"

"Well...uh...it was a little busy today," Spike started nervously, "you know, being the only one here and all that. We had a lot of borrowers, so I couldn't really get away from the lobby."

Twilight took a gander at the table, set out with the two daffodil sandwiches and two glasses of water. It was a relatively small feast compared to what the dragon usually cooked up.

"Gee...it must have been busy..." Twilight said with a hint of accusation in her voice.

"Yeah, sorry about this Twilight, I'll make something special for tomorrow to make up for it."

Twilight sat down at the table, still thinking over what Spike could have been doing while she was out. They certainly never had THAT many ponies come in. Spike was doing something else, something that had to do with keeping two lovers apart from each other, she just knew it...

"How does it taste, Twilight?"

"Easy there, Spike, I'm getting to it."

Spike sat down himself, eying one of his least favorite meals in Equestria. Dragons were not herbivores, and just thinking about the vegetable taste in his mouth displeased him. Nevertheless, it was the quickest thing he could come up with, given the small amount of time before Twilight got home, or any other pony happened to barge in on him like Rainbow Dash had done.

"Aren't you going to eat your sandwich, Spike?"

Twilight looked at him innocently, but Spike was aware that she knew about his dislike of plant foods. She was trying to pick up on any hint that he had been doing anything more than tending to the library today.

"Oh, right, here goes."

Spike slowly bit into the offending sandwich, tasting that leafy, watery edge that left him empty thirty minutes later, not to mention feeling a tad ill. He rolled the chunk around in his mouth as fast as he could, chewing and swallowing to get it through.

"Mmmm...that's good eatin' right there, let me tell you!"

"...(Blech)..."

Spike eyed Twilight as she, satisfied with Spike's show, munched on her own dinner. She didn't really bother savoring it too much, as the pit in her stomach needed to be filled. Twilight hammered down both the sandwich and her glass of water within minutes, getting up to leave Spike to himself while he ate.

"Thanks Spike, that really hit the spot! I'll be on the couch for a minute if you need me. Remember to finish the rest of your dinner."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm not a little kid, Twilight," Spike playfully quipped back, although considering the crud in front of him, some part of it was a genuine complaint.

"Just kidding, Spike,"

Twilight closed the door to the kitchen, and promptly, Spike threw the sandwich in the garbage. He waited for a while to start cleaning up the rest of the plates and whatever silverware was still left. He made his way out into the lobby after he was done.

"You know, Twilight, I..." Twilight looked up at him when he wasn't continuing, it looked like he was ready to throw something up. He was heaving and holding his mouth in a claw.

"Oh no...don't tell me one little piece of daffodil is making me sick!"

"Spike, are you alright?..."

Suddenly, a great belch came from the baby dragon, followed by the familiar green fire of a letter passing whatever dimensional rift Spike's stomach was connected to. The said letter materialized in front of his face, and he caught it in a claw reflexively.

Twilight looked just as wide-eyed in surprise as Spike as he opened the letter. As was obvious, the letter was from none other than Princess Celestia herself. Spike read it out loud as Twilight would undoubtedly be curious too, and she'd force it from him if he didn't.

- MY FAITHFUL STUDENT, TWILIGHT SPARKLE -

I am looking forward, very much, to your presentation. However, I am writing this brief note to inform you that I have another pressing engagement to attend to on the day of which you requested. Unfortunately, because of this, I cannot be present for your report...

Spike stopped reading for a moment with hope in his eyes that the entire thing was cancelled, while Twilight sat on the couch, horror-struck and near the point of angry tears that Celestia would not be coming, hooves pushing against the fabric harshly. Spike read on.

...Since you have typically shown that you are well prepared in advance in the years past, I am confident in you when I make the request to appear a day early, more specifically, tomorrow night. I apologize in advance if this upsets any sort of planning you have already done for that day, and if that is not good for you, then we can schedule it another day that is more to your liking. Thank you very much, My Dear, and I will await your reply.

- BEST WISHES FROM PRINCESS CELESTIA OF EQUESTRIA -

"YESYESYESYESYES!" Twilight jumped off of the couch and pranced around the room giddily, despite her horribly burning legs, while Spike wore a mask of utter defeat.

"No...no...this can't be!" Spike yelled to himself, "I haven't even prepared the rest of the planning for that soup! I've only now started thinking about what to do about Twilight being here when the princess comes! This is bad!"

Spike could've curled up into a ball and died right there. He might as well, since after Twilight showed the extent of her "true feelings" for the princess, they would probably be exiled from Equestria for the rest of their days. At least in the dungeon, ponies who have committed crimes were still less likely to be ripped apart than if they were exiled to the lands of the dragons, the griffons, the hydras, wherever Celestia would banish them to. Spike was too young and too...like a pony to make it out in those harsh environments.

To add insult to injury, Twilight came up to Spike and shouted one last big, "YEEEEES!" in his face, knowing that trying to keep her and Celestia apart would only be that much harder for her dragon companion.

"Sigh..."

Twilight was twitching all over as she imagined the feel of Celestia's hooves pressed against her fur and skin, she could almost taste the princess, she was so close to the big day, or night in this case.

"Spike," Twilight stood triumphantly, forelegs open in a heroic stance, after a minute of fantasizing, "take a note!"

Spike wouldn't move from his position, the life was drained out of him, but in one last bid of hope he thought that no letter to the princess meant there would be no presentation tomorrow, he couldn't bring himself to help Twilight grant that request.

"Spike, is my assistant being disobedient?" Twilight huffed as she watched Spike's pathetic, red-eyed glare shoot back at her in resistance.

"I will not take a note, Twilight!"

"Oh, I think you will, Spike, even if I have to pen it myself, and then force the fire out of your little throat!"

Spike stood his ground vehemently. Twilight would not intimidate him. He tried to appeal to her, however, to rethink the situation.

"Twilight, if you go through with...whatever you're going to do to the princess tomorrow, you are going to be punished severely. We aren't just talking about a night or two in a cell this time. She sent us away to Ponyville because of your actions. This time, I can only guess we'll be banished. Doesn't really matter where, we're dead meat either way."

The raging purple unicorn would have none of that talk.

"...take the note...NOW!"

Spike was through trying to reason with Twilight at this point. As he ran for cover, he declared, "The only letter I'm writing is a warning for her to keep away from this place!"

Twilight's horn hummed to life as she zeroed in on the purple dragon, running behind a podium for protection.

"If you aren't going to help me willingly, then I'll just MAKE you send it!"

Spike scribbled on a scroll as fast as his claws could.

- DEAR PRINCESS CELESTIA...

ZAP!

The podium Spike hid behind was fried to a crisp with a powerful lightning bolt. He dived behind a nearby coffee table, flipping it up and continuing the letter.

THIS IS SPIKE! DO NOT...

ZAP CRRRRR!

The table burnt in front of Spike's widened eyes, becoming a useless pile of ashes and soot. Another bolt was thrown his way, and he barely dodged the hot, purple bullet. He slid behind a drawing table, this time turning it down because of the angle.

COME TO LIBRARY FOR ANY REASON...

BOOOOM!

His shield was all but busted apart, and he had nothing else within reach to hide behind. In defiance, he kept his ground and continued his warning, despite being completely vulnerable.

TWILIGHT HAS GONE...

He wasn't paying attention to the unicorn throwing the bolts of lightning from her horn, not that it would've mattered. She had him trapped, and he wouldn't be going anywhere now. Another small bolt was shot into the dragon's head, dampening his awareness of the world around him, and his arms, as much as he tried to move them, would not budge.

"UAAH...URGH!..."

Spike fell to the ground with a pointed thud, scroll and quill no longer gripped in his motionless claws. It wouldn't kill him, but it was just enough for Twilight to do what she needed to.

"Alright, my answer to the princess is complete. Now then, time to breathe on the scroll, Spike."

Spike fought his helplessness in the presence of his deranged friend, but try as he might, he could do nothing but plead weakly.

"No...Twilight...don't...do it..."

"Now now, Spike, you've already lost this one. You might as well give up gracefully."

Twilight used her magic to control Spike's breathing. A tear fell from Spike's eye as he unwillingly inhaled and exhaled, producing green fire, and sending the scroll, as well as the princess, to their untimely fates.

"There you go...that wasn't so bad now, was it Spike?"

Spike tried as hard as he could not to look Twilight in the eye. He was ashamed, not only of her, but of himself too. If only he had worked harder that day. If only he had everything ready today, so that tomorrow wouldn't be such a loss. Now, that was gone, and Spike found himself in the losing position.

"I think it's time for a baby dragon to get some much needed rest," Twilight smirked as she picked Spike up with her magic again. She tucked him into his little bed, smiling at her handiwork for the night.

Spike could hardly show any disapproval, as the muscles in his face were far too numb and relaxed, but he was livid.

"Oh, and Spike, I think I should warn you now," Twilight said before retiring to her own room, "I've also put a curse on you. For the entire day tomorrow, you won't be able to pick up a parchment or quill to write whatever lies you were going to give the princess. Sleep well, or, at least as well as you can, given the circumstances."

Twilight shut herself inside the room, leaving Spike in his basket, furious at the way things turned out. He may not be able to warn the princess now, but he could certainly try to improvise his way through tomorrow. From the information he had gathered, there was likely to be some kind of intervention for the "awful" things he had done to Twilight, or a possible riot... Either way, he would get Twilight out of the library and trap her somewhere so that he was the only one Celestia saw tomorrow, and would say that the unicorn has the flu. He'd have to find Rainbow Dash (if she decided to help him) and Fluttershy, and enlist their aid.

"For everypony, I've got to make sure those two never meet."

Spike's eyes started to droop, his plans formed and his mind and body tired. Eventually, he fell into a deep sleep in the middle of the night.

A/N - It's been a while since I wrote anything on this (4 or so months), so it might have seemed different from my other chapters, but, personally, I like the pacing more. I hope you enjoyed this remake, and thanks a million to all of those who've put up with my hiatus and are still reading. Bye for now.


	7. The Old Chapter 6: A Clopfic Revisited

UPDATED A/N MARCH OF 2012 - Due to request, I have put back old chapter six, this one, and old chapter seven for the viewing pleasure (but I'm gathering mostly pain) of those who wish to subject themselves to these. This follows chapter five, the "Rarity" one. Here you go everybody...

A/N / Disclaimer (written back in December) - This story has now officially earned its "M" rating. There are going to be some slightly graphic things in this chapter that the following groups may want to (but aren't necessarily forced to) stay away from: Persons under 18, and persons who say "DO NOT WANT" to sexual themes involving ponies. Otherwise, it's another Twilight fantasy chapter, because I didn't have anything more concrete at the moment for plot purposes, but the end will hopefully be somewhat interesting... Anyway, please enjoy my degradation into clop-fiction...

Twilight pranced down the somewhat dusty roads once again, a new spring in her step after her visit to both Applejack and Rarity. It was undeniable, at this point, that they would concede to assisting her no matter what. She had convinced them so well of their dragon friend's misdeeds. The only possible problem with them being behind her, one hundred percent, was that as far as an action plan to keep Spike occupied was concerned, she didn't have the slightest idea of what to do. So far, she had just been going with the natural flow of her story, more than successful at instilling fear in her own companions. Now, where did she go from here? She had three others to tell the farce to at least, she wasn't sure if she'd get the rest of the town involved or not, as it might be a little overkill. The more ponies who were aware of the situation, the higher possibility that somepony might call her bluff and ruin her plans.

"Think, Twilight, think," she groaned to herself, "you'll have more than enough pony power to do anything you want to Spike, but what is it that I can do to him?"

She started getting really frustrated with her thoughts, which made her increasingly more aware of the grumbling in her stomach. That's right, she hadn't had lunch yet, and it was well after noon when she would've already eaten by now.

"Guess I can make a quick stop at a restaurant..." Twilight resigned, not very happy with having to delay her messages. She still needed to talk to Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy today, and two ponies had taken more than half the day, so she'd probably be out all night at this rate.

She spotted a conveniently placed restaurant on the right side of the dirt street. The purple magician was grateful that it was in her path, and maybe it wouldn't take so long to meet everypony tonight after all. She sat down, and eventually a waitress made her way over to the table she was sitting at.

"Hello there, my name is Sun Spot, and I will be your waitress for the day. How may I help you?"

Twilight absentmindedly ordered a simple daffodil sandwich with hay fries, not wanting to be stuck there all day waiting for the world to end. Her waitress took everything down in her note pad and smiled to the unicorn.

"Alright, I'll have that for you right away, Miss!"

She took off like a rocket. Twilight was somewhat impressed by the speed at which she had just left. She must really not want to lose this job.

Wait a minute, didn't she just get through telling Twilight that her name was Sun Spot? Sun, as in...

"Princess Celestia..." Twilight's eyes started to dilate uncontrollably as her fantasy world inexplicably took hold of her consciousness. Uh oh, why now, of all times, did she have to go into a trance? With each passing moment that went by before Twilight's eventual "presentation" for the princess, her ability to keep the sultry thoughts at bay was diminishing.

- THE FOLLOWING HALLUCINATION DOES NOT REFLECT REALITY, OR THE VIEWS AND/OR OPINIONS OF THE AUTHOR

Twilight sat on her red sofa out in the lobby of her library home one night. Every little strand of hair on her mane and tail, or fur on her body, curled and stood up on end as she beheld a letter just sent to her via mail pegasus, Ditzy Doo. Spike was snoring like a factory in his little basket bed, unable to be woken up, and unaware of his unicorn friend's ecstasy at receiving something so personal from her goddess.

- My Faithful Student, Twilight Sparkle -

I have taken the liberty of penning a personal message for your eyes only. This has been sent by mail, as I would not wish for Spike to read it.

It has been such a long time since I have conversed with my favorite student, and therefore I would like to invite you to the Canterlot Palace for dinner and light conversation, if you are not currently busy with other affairs that is...

"WELL DUUUUUH!" Twilight thought to herself dramatically, never too busy with anything to see her mentor. Hell, Equestria could have been uber nuked and Twilight would still not be too preoccupied to spend time with her long time fixation. She read on...

I have been looking forward to a private night with my dearest pupil for ages, and I would be most appreciative if you could make it. I will be awaiting your answer shortly. Do not worry about sending a return letter, as that would take far too long to receive. I have taken it upon myself to send a chariot for you, and you may give your answer to the guard ponies right about...now...

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

How does she do that? Twilight, surprised by the pinpoint accuracy of the contents of the letter, trotted over to the door and opened it. She wasn't quite prepared for what she saw, however.

"PRINCESS CELESTIA?" Twilight gasped and shook all over with a delightful nervousness.

"Oh, My Faithful Student, I just couldn't help my excitement. I flew in the chariot over here, so that I might get your answer personally."

Twilight sat stunned for a few moments, not expecting Celestia to just show up at her doorstep on such short notice. Her heart rate was slowly starting to climb.

"Of course I'd like to come to dinner with you, Your Majesty!"

Celestia seemed uncharacteristically thrilled by Twilight's answer.

"Oh that is wonderful, Twilight! Let us be off right away!"

They walked out into the cool night air. The guards were standing by for orders to depart. Once they saw the princess and her companion, they opened the carriage door for them, escorting the two mares to their seats. Once inside, the doors were closed, and the guards prepared their harnesses, getting ready to take off into the clear, blue night.

"I can tell that we're going to have a lot to talk about. It feels like I haven't seen you for months, even though we share letters about your findings on at least a weekly basis."

The princess nuzzled Twilight lovingly, and the unicorn was enjoying every single second of it. It took every ounce of willpower she had to not throw both front hooves around her teacher and give her a wet, sloppy kiss on the lips. Instead, she just let the princess have as much gentle contact with her as she wanted.

After a few minutes of fumbling with their harnesses, the royal guards looked at each other, confirming their readiness, and took off with a great rush of wind into the night sky.

Surprisingly, the trip was only a few minutes, where any other form of transportation would have ranged from hours to days. Those must have been some extremely strong guard ponies. They didn't even seem that fazed by the ordeal. All they did was call out to the guards on the landing pad that they were making a touchdown, and once there, shrugged off their harnesses while two of them opened the carriage doors for the princess and her young charge.

Outside of the two mares' earshot, two of the landing pad guards conversed.

"Who's that young filly with the princess?"

"Didn't you hear, that's one of the princess' students, Twilight Sparkle."

"What, you mean the one Princess Celestia talks about a lot, and writes all of those raunchy stories about in her spare time?"

"Yeah, that's the one."

"She's going to be one lucky filly tonight then. I overheard that the princess was planning something REAAAALY special for that one, if you know what I mean..."

The other guard glanced at him with a knowing, suggestive chuckle.

"Yep...that's our princess alright..."

As Twilight and her dear friend and mentor made their way toward the palace, Celestia had a wing wrapped around the younger mare protectively.

"You must be chilly, Twilight, allow me to shelter you from the cold until we get inside."

Twilight was anything but chilly right now. Being in that enclosed space with the lovely object of every single thought she had (dirty or otherwise) made the momentary heat in the cabin unbearable. Even in the cold night, she felt like she was in a sauna with a hundred fat stallions, sweating their balls off. She choked on her saliva as she gulped it down, and responded.

"Ummmm...th...thank you very much...Your Highness..."

Celestia just smiled at her. It was a warm smile, but her eyes held a little bit of...something very unnerving to the smaller purple unicorn, almost as if she were plotting something.

The guards opened the two large doors for the friendly couple, saluting to their princess as she naturally sashayed through with that regal grace afforded her. They made their way through the halls, seemingly deserted for the night with nopony around. It was the perfect time for an intimate dinner. The one small annoyance however, was the entourage of guard ponies that incessantly followed them every step of the way. There would be no guards ruining the mood tonight if Celestia had anything to say about it...

"Gentlecolts, you have done a fine duty for me and my student. Now, I would like to request that the guards leave the two of us to ourselves for the rest of the night."

"But Princess, are you absolutely..."

Celestia gave the offending guard a look that would allow no rebuttal.

"Very well, Your majesty. At ease men!"

The guards scattered in multiple directions, some heading out to the bar for their nightly brew, some going home to their families to rest and relax. One thing was for sure, there would be no more interruptions to get between Twilight and her teacher.

In the intricate mess of hallways and corridors, Celestia and Twilight made their way over to the dining hall, thankfully not getting lost on the way. The princess knew exactly where she was headed, but Twilight felt like she could get stranded in a place so huge and interweaving. The princess opened the door very softly and quietly, motioning for Twilight to enter first.

"After you, Twilight."

Twilight stepped into the illustrious dining hall, where various soups, salads, snack crackers, and fruits were waiting. The preparation of the foods was quite aesthetically pleasing. The colors were coordinated with each other, and each entree was categorized together, so that there wasn't just a huge pile of foods on top of others or around them. It made things much easier to locate.

Twilight took in the table of dishes hungrily, but was confused as to which seat she was supposed to take. She remembered, from her earlier days, how royal table manners were supposed to be kept. Royalty sat on the ends, where they could be featured as special guests or the masters of the palace appropriately. Any other guests and dignitaries were seated lengthwise on the long, rectangular table. Twilight assumed that she should make her way over to one of the seats nearer to the middle, as that would be proper of her, but Celestia quickly thought against it.

"Oh no Twilight, you, My Student, shall be sitting right over there."

Celestia demonstrated, with a hoof, the exact location of where she would sit. On the very end of the table, two chairs had been put side by side. This certainly was not standard etiquette, but then again, what about tonight would have been standard... Celestia just gave Twilight an approving nod when the unicorn bashfully turned to her, making sure that the seat she was seeing was the one Celestia was pointing at. So, she made herself comfortable on the seat next to her princess.

Celestia was the next pony to take her seat, sliding into it with graceful, fluid motions of her legs and hooves. Twilight watched the entire scene, completely entranced. Was everything the princess did so finessed, so smooth? She was so close to Twilight now that the white alicorn's soft breaths were audible to Twilight's ears. Let's also just say that the banquet laid out on the royal table wasn't the only sweet smell invading Twilight's senses. She could've leaned over to Celestia, thrust her nose into her side, and just taken a long, drawn out sniff of her coat. The scent was pure, and clean, just like the color of her whole body. Twilight felt really, REALLY warm while they sat there, enjoying each others company.

"Dinner is served! What would you like to start on, Twilight?"

"..." Twilight thought to herself naughtily, "I'd like to skip dinner and have you instead..."

"OH UHHHH..." Twilight couldn't believe it had just formed in her mind like that, "I'd...like to start with the fruit, maybe."

Twilight gave an apologetic grin, more reminiscent of Fluttershy. She couldn't stand Celestia just sitting there, eying her with that sort of innocent look on her face.

"Excellent idea, the fruit it is then! Which one would you like to sample first?"

"Uh...the grapes I guess..."

Celestia used her magic to grasp onto the far off plate of plump, purple grapes. They looked like they were picked off of the vine just a minute ago. Given the luxury of the palace, they probably were. The plate hovered over to the waiting pair and delicately clicked onto the table in front of them. Celestia picked off one of the grapes magically.

"Thank you, Prin..." Before Twilight could finish her sentence, Celestia plopped the tasty little morsel into the unicorn's mouth. She was taken aback a little, but she didn't mind it. It was delicious.

"So, Twilight, how are they?..." Celestia had an unreadable expression as Twilight gave her a shocked stare at what she just did.

"They're great!"

"I'm very glad to hear that. Would you like me to feed you another?..."

Twilight nearly coughed up a lung. A huge blush crept into her cheeks as she almost choked on the insidious little fruit. She finally got it down after a few seconds, but the coloration in her face remained.

"Uh..." the young mare's mind was starting to fry from the gravity of what Celestia just asked, "...sure, Princess, go ahead..."

As Celestia picked off another grape and held it up to Twilight's lips, she could swear that the princess was deliberately rubbing the grape against them, as if she was teasing her in some way. Soon, the grape was put through her lips gently, where she grabbed it in her teeth and began to chew slowly, letting the juice glide along her tongue. She had to refrain from smacking her lips, because as rude as it would have been, she almost couldn't help how juicy and sweet they were. Celestia gave a larger grin this time, pleased that Twilight was so receptive to her feeding.

Dinner moved on very well after that. Twilight and Celestia talked about all of the things they had been doing that day, and for the last few weeks. Twilight told Celestia about some of her studies she had been working on for a while. They had a marvelous dinner chatting and remembering old times gone by. Soon after though, the words Twilight was dreading since the beginning were spoken.

"Well, I think that just about wraps up dinner for tonight, Twilight."

Twilight was crestfallen at that.

"Oh...I guess it does then..."

Twilight didn't want to leave the comfort of her mentor's presence.

"Now, it's time for us to head over to my chambers so that we may continue our discussions."

She visibly livened up at what Celestia had just said. She had thought that was all they were going to do, eat dinner, chat, and then Twilight would have to go for the night. This news lifted her spirits greatly. Celestia giggled lightly at her pupil's sudden mood change.

"Yes, Twilight, after all, the staff has to be able to clean this mess up sometime, and they can't do it with us around. Therefore, a change of venue is in order."

Twilight and her princess stood from their seats and headed for the double doors of the dining hall. Celestia, once again, opened it for Twilight. After she was through, Celestia went through, closing the door behind her. The halls were a little ghostly, as they were deserted and quiet. Twilight's voice cut through the uncomfortable silence.

"So, Princess Celestia, I'm surprised that you are inviting me into your chambers. You don't usually do that for just anypony."

"That's right, My Dear, this is a very special occasion, and I am honored to have you here!"

Although Celestia may not have known it, her voice drove Twilight crazy with passion. She could listen to her princess speak about anything or nothing at all for as long as she was able to. That voice was so soothing, so sensual. Twilight could only imagine how she would sound if they were occupied with more...intimate activities...

"Twilight...is everything alright over there?"

She didn't notice that she had blanked out after the first sentence. She was mortified that she had just stopped listening to Celestia to have her mind wander to indecent thoughts about the white mare in front of her.

"No no, I'm fine, Princess! Just thinking about a few things going on in the library back in Ponyville."

The two ponies had already made it to Celestia's chambers. When Twilight was admiring the regal yet cozy study of her mentor, Celestia had shut and locked her door with a glint in her ruby eyes.

"Still thinking about your work in Ponyville, are we? Oh Twilight, you're such a studious mare, but I'm worried that you haven't gotten a lot of time to just sit back and...relax."

Celestia motioned for Twilight to join her on one of her royal pillows. They were absurdly large, as one was enough to fit both the princess and the unicorn at once. Granted, they were in fairly close proximity, but still big nonetheless.

Twilight and Celestia just sat there for a few seconds, basking in the warmth of the fireplace. At one interval, Celestia had thrown yet another wing around her star student, stroking her back for her as if to give a light massage. Twilight certainly enjoyed it, and was starting to feel that familiar heat around her entire body again. Celestia noticed a few temperature changes in Twilight, but didn't pay it any attention as she continued to work her wing over the unicorn's body gently.

"Mmmm...that feels good, Princess..." Twilight's mind was turning to mush as the pleasurable sensation filled every bit of her consciousness.

"I'm glad you like it, Twilight..." Celestia whispered in her ear.

After a few minutes, Celestia was starting to stroke harder, working the stress out of Twilight's back, withers, and flanks. Twilight was audibly panting, much to Celestia's delight. Perspiration rolled down some of Twilight's more sensitive areas, especially whenever she rubbed a particularly nerve rich spot. Soon enough, Celestia let up and took her wing off of Twilight, making the purple pony moan in frustration.

"Now then, My Faithful Student..." the princess breathed into her ear, "...I think it's time for some dessert."

Twilight frowned at Celestia incredulously.

"I thought we already had dinner and dessert tonight, Your Majesty."

Celestia's soft smile was slowly being replaced by a wider, more lustful grin.

"Oh, Twilight, I forgot to tell you earlier...you ARE the dessert..."

Before Twilight could possibly register the meaning of those words, Celestia had flipped Twilight onto her back and got up a little herself, straddling the frozen, confused mare with a frenzied look in her eyes.

"Wh..." was all Twilight could get out before Celestia pressed her own lips roughly against her student's. After all of the close contact with the princess, and after all of the teasing and tantalizing her mentor had been assaulting her with all night, Twilight felt like her brain was going to explode from all of the built up sexual energy she stored that came rushing through her veins. The princess' tongue was a powerful organ indeed, as it ripped through the once pursed lips and dominated her own without contest. Twilight didn't care though. If it meant satisfying her princess, then whatever she wanted to do would suffice. Twilight gave one, guttural, throaty moan into Celestia's mouth. The mare in question was having her own troubles not moaning so loud into Twilight's that her head would vibrate from it.

Both ponies were so excited and aroused by each other, at this point, that when Celestia withdrew to allow her charge breathing room, no doubt needed, there were many thick strands of saliva connecting the fervent mares' lips together.

"...Oh...and what a dessert it will turn out to be..." Celestia mused to Twilight as both of the flustered mares breathed in and out heavily.

"...but..." Twilight's grasp on the situation was soon going to be too muddled to know what was going on, so she had to be quick about it, "...I didn't think that you..."

"...felt the same way? Let's be honest here, Twilight, I've known about your feelings for a long time." Twilight turned her head in shame, she had tried, really horribly, to keep it from leaking out, but she failed.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Twilight. Obviously, not only do I feel the same way, but I've gone a long time without any action, waiting until I found the right pony, and I've felt itchy since you've developed into the sexy young mare you are today. I can't let you get away from me now!"

Twilight watched as her princess enveloped her lips yet again, getting more heated by the moment. Celestia's wet, hot kisses were getting more aggressive as she playfully bit Twilight's lips. Twilight put her front hooves around her princess' dainty, swan-like neck, running them through her luxurious mane as she did so.

"It's true...princess..." Twilight tried to word between forceful lip locks and nerves twitching in her body, "I've thought about you ever since I came to your school! You've always been the only mare for me!"

Celestia appreciatively nibbled on her ear as she whispered huskily into it.

"I can tell..."

The ruler of Equestria would not be satiated with only kissing and nibbling, however, and with Twilight's reassuring statements knew that she would be able to fix the problems in her lower regions post haste. With Twilight rubbing her own hooves into the princess' back and stiffening wings, Celestia was soaking wet all over, and not just with sweat. As Twilight touched some sensitive spots near the bases of her wings, she growled at the building pressure in her already throbbing mare parts.

"Good heavens, Twilight...you're sure you haven't done this before?..."

"Well," Twilight responded sheepishly, "I have been experimenting..."

Celestia took note of her words in some corner of her mind that wasn't busy screaming for more.

"...I suppose that IS what you're good at..."

Celestia knew she was going to go insane pretty soon if Twilight didn't start attending to her, but she allowed Twilight to hastily and inexpertly explore her body with her hooves. The more she allowed it to accumulate, the more amazing it would feel at the big finish. As it was, the sun goddess was heaving breaths in and out between explorations of Twilight's teeth and gums, and her chest was getting tighter and tighter by the second.

Twilight wasn't having much more luck in her corner. Every nerve in her body was hissing and crackling with a fiery steam as Celestia's body clung to the unicorn in a sensual grip. Dry humping wasn't quite the right word for what she was doing, as Twilight could tell by the trail left on her legs that the princess' lower lips were sopping with liquid, as were hers. Twilight felt a little inadequate as a virgin, since the princess had probably known the touch of another pony many times more than she had, but all the same, she was giving it her best shot. Celestia didn't seem to mind at all.

"Mmmm...Twilight...I can't take this much longer...I need you to go lower..."

Celestia stood up off of Twilight, rolling to her side on the pillow gracefully, spreading herself out for the young mare to behold. She was a glorious sight. Her white coat had been matted a little by all of her perspiration, but was still the radiant white that Twilight was so fond of. She looked further down her body, drinking in every inch, when she stopped at the little, only slightly puffy slit of the princess' vaginal entrance. Twilight had seen books before with mare parts in them, most of them were discolored in some way, or swollen, but Celestia's lower lips were velvety, relatively small, and only on the inside could she see the healthy, bright red they gave off. Twilight had to stifle an "mmmmm..." as she took in those flawless lips and the ample cheeks of her posterior, knowing that she would soon be able to feel, taste, and smell the scrumptious cunt.

"What should I do, Princess..."

Celestia was hot, impatient, and horny at the same time.

"Anything you want Twilight, just do something quickly!"

Not needing any other incentive, Twilight curiously put a hoof out to touch the dripping organ. She liked doing this to herself when Spike was (hopefully) asleep. As first contact was made, Celestia sucked in a deep breath, sparks racing through her own nervous system madly.

"Oh, I'm sorry Princess...did I hurt you..."

"Don't stop Twilight, it's fine, I need more!"

Twilight began rubbing the hoof up and down her entrance. As this was going on, Celestia shivered and stuttered irregularly, finally forcing out a slightly relieved sigh as Twilight began working the hoof a little faster this time. Eventually, Twilight's timid working on her lower lips just wasn't enough for the white mare.

"Twilight...lick me...all over in there..." Celestia was drooling at the very thought of Twilight's clumsy tongue roving around her insides.

Twilight had never done such a thing before, and certainly didn't see how something so typically dirty would taste good at all, but this was her teacher she was talking about here. Of course her's would be much better tasting! Twilight took a tentative full tongue lick up the length of Celestia's slit. As she did so, Celestia whimpered delightedly, hoping the exquisite feeling wracking her whole body would never go away.

Twilight drew back in a small second of thought. She was right, Celestia's slit tasted fantastic!

"Ugh...Twilight," Celestia's eyes were rolling into the back of her head after that slight press, "please keep going!"

Twilight obliged heartily. She started down at the base of the tender orifice, licking in small, pointed circles, lubricating it with not only her own saliva, but more of Celestia's hot sweat and juices. Celestia took some hard, shallow breaths to keep the feeling going, and also to keep from screeching out in dire lust. Her whole body took on a rosy shine as the blood in her veins and vessels raced around, preparing for an inevitable climax.

Twilight took more initiative and worked those same circles, a little bigger this time, around the entirety of her mound, but to Celestia's sexual fury, ignoring the partially hidden clitoris that was aching to be sucked on.

"Twilight," she almost barked, forgetting her grace in the face of frantic pleasure, "you remember the clitoris, right? I need you to work that some more right now! Also, dive in a little further with your tongue!"

Twilight couldn't believe she had been ignoring the most important parts of her ruler. Right away, she began searching the small slit for the hidden object. As her tongue entered all the way into Celestia's tight folds, her lower body spasmodically jerked while she sucked in a breath through gritted teeth. In Twilight's inexperienced bid to locate the clit, her tongue ended up slamming into something rigid but fleshy.

"NGH! There you go Twilight...that's the spot!" Celestia bucked into Twilight's face, almost making her lose her balance. "Now..." Celestia's harsh breathing made it difficult to speak, "force your tongue around that, and as far into me as you can go! Don't hold back!"

Twilight took her command like a good little pony. She sloppily french kissed the whole pussy, wiggling her tongue over the clit, and doing everything she could to get as far in as possible. Celestia thought it was a poor excuse for a stallion, but at least the tongue was more flexible, and could reach crevasses that could not.

"You can nip all around a little too Twilight..." Celestia needed more stimulation to get over the hill, even if she was sore from it in the morning.

Twilight obeyed and started nibbling on everything she could.

"Oooh..." Celestia's eyes were shut tight from the sensory overload. Even as she bucked her hips frantically into Twilight's face once she was close, grunts and moans were the only things the mare could articulate.

Twilight noticed that the princess' motions were becoming more erratic, more frenzied as she kept up the heavenly assault on the princess' cunt. Pretty soon, Celestia could hardly care if she woke the entire palace as her horn started to glow and she was practically off of the ground, slamming herself into Twilight's sweet mouth.

"OH...TWILIGHT...I'M GETTING CLOSER...I'M SO CLOSE...OH YES...HERE IT GOES...I'M GOING TO...I'M GOING TO..."

"HELLOOOO?"

The waitress had been standing in front of the purple pony for five minutes. She had already given Twilight her food, which looked completely untouched, and now needed to collect on the bill for it. Twilight had a dopey look on her face, tongue hanging out and drool falling onto the table. Did she go brain dead or something?

"ANYPONY IN THERE?"

The waitress tapped hard on her table in front of her. Somehow, this took Twilight straight out of her sexual fantasies and back into the cold, cruel reality that was Equestria. Damn, and the princess was just about to come all over the place too. Twilight could tell by the near gallons of fluids the princess had been leaking...

She looked into the face of the now completely perturbed waitress who was about ready to crack her clipboard over Twilight's head. Must have spaced out for a long time there...

"I'm so sorry for zoning out like that! Here you go!" Twilight put the appropriate number of shiny bits into the saddlebag of the waitress. She stared at Twilight as she slowly made her way back over to the front desk of the establishment. The whole time she had this "what's wrong with you?" grimace on her face. Luckily, there was no other reason for the suspicious waitress to come back, so Twilight immediately gulped down her daffodil sandwich and hay fries in a few seconds, not wanting to stay any longer and continue receiving looks from other ponies who had no doubt seen the entire thing unfold in front of them.

The unicorn started her short trek to Sugarcube Corner. Maybe retelling her incriminating tale of Spike's unthinkable ways would give her a good mental exercise to relinquish her ever vivid daydreams.

Meanwhile in the Ponyville Library, our hero for this story, Spike, was hard at work, thinking of unique, ground-breaking ways he could spice up this dish he was preparing.

"Hmm..." he hummed to himself in thought, "Everypony I know has already made tons of different soups before. It's one of the most overdone dinners I've ever seen. What could I possibly do to make it stand out, even if it's just a little bit?..."

Well, most ponies made soups that were salty, and full of some kind of vegetable broth. They usually filled them with potatoes and chunks of other vegetables...

"How about instead of a dinner soup, I make something sweet, like a dessert soup! Nopony's ever tried that one before!"

Spike was content with the idea. It seemed decently original, and he could certainly work with it if he changed up the list of ingredients a lot. He could make something chocolatey, or maybe with some sort of fruit flavor. Probably not both, as fruit mixed with chocolate, while sometimes made some miraculously good flavors, was a hit or miss with some ponies. He would need to go out and get the different kinds of fruit, chocolate, and possible candies he would need tonight because by tomorrow, he was sure to get railroaded by his and Twilight's friends, coming to do something awful to him for hurting Twilight. He would certainly not disappoint them with the charade he had planned for the unknowing mares when they got there. With that knowledge in mind, he couldn't hang around for too long, and would have to high-tail it out of Ponyville as fast as he could.

Spike noticed by the sun's position in the sky, outside one of the windows, that noon had come and gone already. He was kind of cheating on his promise to run the library for Twilight while she was gone, but he had to get those articles very soon, mostly to be able to avoid as many of their friends as possible, and also because he didn't want Twilight cluing into what he had planned in her sudden "absence" from her report day. So, he decided to write a note and tape it to the door, reading, "OUT FOR AN HOUR, BACK SOON!"

The weather had cleared up quite a bit in a few short hours, so he decided that he wouldn't need his own umbrella. He locked the door on his way out, leaving behind a deserted library for a while.

As he stepped out onto the mushy town streets, he suddenly remembered something, a really BAD something.

"Uh oh...the only sweets shop in this entire small town is...gulp...SUGARCUBE CORNER!" Spike hadn't realized that the only place he could possibly get anything he would need for this dessert soup would be the exact same place where one of Twilight's friends would be waiting to tan his hide!

"Okay...calm down Spike," he reasoned with himself, "judging by how many times Twilight has probably been getting side tracked, and having her sexual delusions about the princess, she's probably wasted a few hours of her day on that alone. Applejack is out in the square, which is the closest area to the library, so she probably went there first, which is why Apple Bloom showed up earlier. Next, I think...Rarity's place is the next she would go to. Then...yeah...probably Pinkie Pie after that, which means...I should be in the clear to get in, get out as fast as possible before Twilight sees me, and I won't have to worry about anything else. Well...I can only hope so at least..."

He decided that he would take a beeline around anypony he knew would be in his way, which might be a tiny bit more walking than a straight line, but he couldn't take any unnecessary chances. Even if it kept him on a short time leash, this was the best he was going to get. He started his journey, stealthily and steadily.

Little did Spike know, his purple unicorn friend was already on her merry way toward Sugarcube Corner, and he had misjudged the amount of time she would spend messing around with her fantasies. This isn't looking very good for Spike right now...

A/N (also written in December)- Spur of the moment thought there with the possible meet up between Spike and Twilight. Shit will be hitting the fan a lot sooner than intended... Not much of a clop-fic writer, so I can't promise anything else of the same magnitude for a while. Thanks again everyone! 


	8. The Old Chapter 7: What Was I On?

UPDATED A/N MARCH OF 2012 - Aaaaand this is old chapter seven, following old chapter 6, which made me realize just how far off balance my writing can be...

A/N (December)- A little shorter than usual for a chapter, but I felt like the cut-off was an appropriate one for now. Enjoy!

Spike rode on a perilous torrent of emotion as he made his way through the narrow, thankfully crowded, streets of Ponyville toward his eventual destination. Armed with the power of magic, and rafting down a river of uncontrollable desire, Spike's long time pony friend was a threat to anypony she met and perceived as a potential obstacle in her way. Spike wanted to shout in the streets that there was a hazardous, possibly deadly, purple unicorn on the loose, and that any who find her should stay as far from the premises as they could. A conflict bubbled in his head over the townsfolk running like mad and screaming through the streets, and the bloodshed that could erupt if Twilight was enraged inadvertently. Another problem might occur, if the others find out, in that Twilight, instead of trying to be helped or rehabilitated, would be punished severely if anypony thought that she was a renegade on the loose, committing heinous acts of debauchery in her wake.

He smiled and waved with a wooden, tense nod to everypony he met on the road to Sugarcube Corner, hoping to deter their need for casual conversation and keeping the lowest profile imaginable. Couldn't have the citizens of Ponyville interrupting the head rush of scenarios and situations he would undoubtedly have to prepare for in case of extreme emergency. He mused to himself, humored by his own remarks, that Twilight couldn't possibly have made it all the way to Sugarcube Corner by now, as half of her waking hours were probably spent daydreaming and goofing around when Princess Celestia was on her mind every moment of the day. He was momentarily confident that the unicorn wouldn't even see him on his way out there, and that he'd be able to make it out of the store in one piece. Then again, even just the sheer possibility of running into Twilight, catching her in the act of incriminating him, filled the small dragon with a primal, primordial terror. The burden of Twilight being aware that he knew her plans would leave him at the disadvantage, not her, as a painful, smoldering death was a tiny, but existent, degree of measure that his mentally distraught friend might impose on him.

"Come on, Spike," he kicked himself mentally, "this is Twilight we're talking about! She's the most fair-minded pony in this whole town! She's the most intelligent magician I've ever known, not to mention the most reasonable!"

Spike thought to himself woefully.

"At least...when she's not like this..."

It was all the more reason that he had to help her. He had done everything he felt was necessary by not talking about the princess, as such topics would bring out her inner demons. He never mentioned her, even when taking down letters most of the time. As long as Twilight's awareness of the things Celestia was doing was kept under wraps, he felt that she wouldn't give in to the raging hormones the princess' utterance would envelop her in. The newspapers in Ponyville? Spike would read them occasionally, and then torch them into char-broiled piles of ash, never to be seen by Twilight in the library, as Celestia, as absurd and mocking as the dragon felt it was, seemed to be on almost every page of the paper. Such a preposterous assault of the princess' mental imagery in Twilight's head would probably make her crack even more often than was feared.

"Spike," he remembered Twilight asking him one time, "what happened to the Ponyville Monthly I just picked up earlier this morning?"

Spike's eyes shifted around as he had just roasted it into nothing and swept it into the trash, nopony the wiser.

"I uh...don't know what you're talking about Twilight..."

"Oh come on," Twilight would say to him, "I could've sworn that newspaper was in here somewhere! Are you sure you haven't seen it today Spike?"

Twilight would give him that devilishly hopeful, doe-eyed expression that could have melted his face off with how cute and expectant it was. He absolutely hated lying to her, but he knew it had to be done.

"...No Twilight," he was about to cry with every sad nuance made clear in her face, "I haven't seen it at all today."

It was almost sinister how upset she would seem, as if she knew about him burning them to the ground all along, and was just along for the ride with this lie he had cooked up, trying to get him to bend and break under the pressure of that tortured puppy look in her eyes. Spike shivered from head to toe just thinking about those times, it's a good thing it only happened every month, or else he would've been broken to her will a long time ago. That unicorn is one scary...

"BITCH!"

Spike jumped at the loud, exclamatory insult thrown by some unknown mare at another pony on the left side of his hearing range.

"Well..." Spike started thinking that somepony was answering for him, "I don't know if I'd go that far..."

"How dare you commission the exact same dress as I would for the Ponyville Gentlecolt's Society Dinner tonight! Get your own style, and quit copying mine, you copycat!"

Spike was now completely interested in the scene enveloping on the left side of the street he was on. He gasped and jumped behind a bush as, lost in his own thoughts, he had unintentionally made his way over to the Carousel Boutique, one of the places Twilight had probably already been to tell her sick, twisted tale of SpikeXTwilight rape-shipping. Spike, though living in a town predominantly female for most of his life had made him sensitive and caring to fillies' and mares' specific issues, the male side of his reptilian mind was secretly fascinated by the cat-fight in front of his eyes.

"Whoa...this is going to be sweet," the little lizard stared wide eyed at the front of the store where, he assumed, two mares of the elite class in Ponyville were fighting over Rarity making them identical party dresses for this high society dinner they were so ravenous about. Rarity was on the sidelines, doing everything she could to calm the two ladies down and get them to be more civilized about the whole ordeal.

It didn't hurt to Spike that both said unicorns were quite attractive, and he knew he was in for a good show. The first mare, the one who had just stabbed her opponent with that venomous insult, was a light red pony, almost as bright as a strawberry. Her full, rich mane, a brownish gold with darker brown highlights interspersed throughout, cascaded down her withers wonderfully, and shook a little as she tore into her rival with a merciless barrage. Her tail was similarly colored, and almost stood on end with how furious she was. The eyes of this mare were lit with anger, and held a similar light brown tint. He also took note, though he'd deny peeking at her nice plot, that her cutie mark looked like a cup made out of some kind of gold. Now what could that possibly mean... Oh, now he knew what they meant when they coined the term "trophy wife", so that's what it was...

"Ladies please, do not fight over this! I'll make you both another dress for the dinner party tonight! It would be no trouble at all!" Rarity tried to quell the fight to a dull roar at most.

The other mare wouldn't back down herself, although she was much more calm and collected about the whole thing, at least on the outside. Her own coat was a color that could've been an orange, or apricot, or possibly both. The mane she was sporting was done up in a neat, tidy bun with only a few stray bangs and curls popping out in an organized fashion. The tone of such a hairstyle resembled that of a dark chocolate, probably closer to black than brown. A similarly shaded tail was swaying with a steady, pendulous rhythm, sleek and silky, as if she had just had it groomed. Her indignant humor was apparent in her light grey eyes. The cutie mark on her own flank, once again at Spike's denial of gazing at, was a pair of glass slippers, indicative of a wealthy shoe tycoon...or possibly a hooker... She was quite reserved in her own behavior, not being as noticeably callous as her opponent was, though she was still giving her own malicious insults blow by blow.

"Oh, Sassy," the unicorn quipped, "I don't know what you were thinking by attempting to fit into such a marvelous dress. You aren't exactly...built for it...if you want my honest opinion. In fact, I'd suggest a little more work on those thighs, when it comes right down to it."

Spike didn't have any idea what the apricot colored unicorn was talking about. Sassy's, as she was called, thighs were, by Spike's standards, probably every stallions' wet dream. If he weren't in love with, and completely devoted to, Rarity, he wouldn't mind if she were his marefriend one bit with that smoking hot body.

"No no no Spike," he chastised himself, "Rarity is the ONLY one for you! Yeah...Rarity..."

He was still having trouble not being excited about both of the unicorns, despite his temporary resolve. Sassy was grinding her teeth in absolute frustration at her long time friend and verbal sparring partner.

"I don't hear anypony else complaining about them, unlike that ratty excuse for a tail on your plot, Chardonnay!"

This seemed to bait the more reserved of the pair to stoop to the same level.

"Well I never! I would be more concerned about that horrible, hairy growth on your own, My Dear!"

As the two mares almost threw hooves at each other, Rarity was once again trying to separate the two with no considerable amount of success.

"Girls, girls! This is not the time, place, or way to behave like this! I will take it upon myself to give you both your own, personal styles of dress, but you two need to quit bickering and follow me, right now!"

It was a useless command, as neither unicorn was anywhere near done arguing with the other. Spike felt terrible for leaving Rarity to pick up the pieces and take the flak, but he had to get going over to his intended point while he still had the time, and this fight gave him the perfect cover to sneak by her.

"Next time, Rarity, I'll help you out, but I can't risk you seeing me right now..."

Spike apologetically crawled out of the bush and back onto the Ponyville streets as fast as his stubby legs could carry him. Spike took one last glance at Rarity, nearly crying in frustration from the dust cloud that had started to build up from the two mares fighting with each other. He felt pretty bad, but it couldn't be helped right now. He had a mission that was many times more important than a squabble between two rich, upper class ponies.

Twilight was still nowhere to be found, which Spike both praised, and feared deeply. Who knew what kind of shenanigans she was trying to pull over on everypony now? She could've already claimed the head of her first victim for all he could surmise. The more times the little dragon foiled her plans, the more her state of calm and reason diminished, and was replaced by cunning, craftiness, and rage. Hell, she had tried to kill somepony on her last tirade through the Canterlot Palace! What would she do to her first unsuspecting soul this time around?

In the distance, like a haunted castle on a hill, Spike could make out Sugarcube Corner. He trembled unknowingly at whether or not Twilight was there, since she hadn't been spotted all day, and neither had he. There were no sound clues yet as to if she were inside, or if she had possibly already beaten him to it, but he forced his legs to move in the direction his mind was hoping he would not have to enter.

Every step felt like a ton of bricks, making him want to go back to the library and curl up into a ball, waiting for the inevitable banishment Twilight would be imposed after luring the princess into her cave-like lair that she passed off as a lab and molesting her in every sense of the word. Such a fate would've been better in comparison to the physical and emotional trauma that Twilight had given not only him, but had involved her friends into now.

"I've gotta get over there! I can't just let Twilight ruin her own life, what kind of assistant would I be if I let that happen?"

Various mechanisms in the dragon's body groaned and squealed together. His racing, frightened mind, his insistently forward-moving legs, and the palpitations in his chest rebelled against one another. He passed by some other ponies he knew, and when they saw the look of dread in the beady little pupils of their resident dragon, they knew to stay away from whatever executioner's block he was doomed for. With his head held down in a solemn bid to keep from taking off in the other direction, giving Ponyville a sharp decree that Twilight Sparkle had officially lost every vestige of her sanity, Spike threw all caution to the wind and strode with awkward, choppy steps up to his final resting place.

Sugarcube Corner, Spike never got why they called it a "corner" as it wasn't really a street, stood menacingly above his tiny, frail body. He recalled the tales told in Hoofsel and Gretel, where the colt and filly approached a gingerbread house, not unlike this one, and were a hair's width close to being eaten alive by the old witch inside. In this case, Spike felt like Hoofsel, and Twilight was the potential witch, lurking inside to gobble him up.

"Well...here goes...prepare for anything, Spike..."

KNOCK...KNOCK...KNOCK...

The slow, resounding clack of scaly flesh on hard wood was deafening to the little dragon, as he could no longer distinguish the outside world from the fear that this once innocent place instilled in him in this moment. The wait for an answer was maddening, as hours seemed to pass without any sign of life from the hollow specter of a house. His breathing started to pick up rapidly as he thought the worst of this situation.

"Oh...CELESTIA...NO...SHE DIDN'T, DID SHE? She wouldn't just kill Pinkie Pie in cold blood right in her own store! This is insane! I'm going to burn this door down in like three seconds if somepony doesn't answer soon..."

The latch of the lock on the door suddenly tripped with a metallic chirp, breaking Spike out of his frantic assumptions. Slowly, but surely, the wooden door creaked open, and Spike saw a pony he thought he'd never hear from again.

"Oh hey there Spike!"

"Oh crap!" Twilight sucked in a quiet shallow breath as she heard Pinkie Pie greet her nosy purple companion with a gleeful zest. She scrambled over to the doorway unthinkingly, trying to stop the next phrase coming out of Pinkie's mouth.

"Twilight was just telling me this crazy story about you beating up her and her coltfriend a few days ago..."

Twilight threw her hoof over the pink mare's face, but it was too late. Spike had caught her red-hoofed in the middle of an even more convoluted tale than the last two that were set up. Spike's shocked, but somehow more aware than he was letting on, gaze scanned over the unicorn's features in a probing manner, searching for some kind of sign that she would pounce on him now that he knew what was going on. Her own look of bashful malevolence, embarrassed at being caught in the act, but not backing down from Spike one bit, was made to counter his own. Nothing was stated for minutes on end, as the tension was so thick that one little peep could set somepony off.

"...Um...Spike...Twilight...you two okay?" Pinkie Pie looked between the two as she tried to decipher the stares given between them.

"Oh good grief..." Spike thought to himself, not speaking out loud yet, "I guess I'm going to have to go with the flow of her story from here on out. Goodbye, cruel world..."

Spike's whimpering glances turned into an unnatural, full-tooth grin on his face, extremely sinister in its intent. Twilight was nowhere near the dragon at the time, but once he gave her those heated eyes, she was so unnerved that receding into the store became a much more viable option. Pinkie Pie allowed Spike to step in and closed the door behind for him.

"Is this all true Spike...is Twilight just a part of your harem like the rest of us are?..."

Twilight also spoke up, "...and what are you doing here when you should be taking care of the library right now?..."

The three of them dreaded the answer he was about to give, even Spike himself, as it was now or never to enact his next move.

"Twilight..." an uncomfortable silence was drawn out as it took a few seconds for him to get his act together, he ignored Twilight's question altogether in favor of his own question, "...you do realize that I am the only coltfriend you will ever have...right?..."

Both of the mares in the room gasped loudly, and gaped wide-eyed at the lustful nuances in Spike's behavior. Twilight's words had slipped out before she even registered exactly what Spike had just uttered.

"Quit trying to deny it, Spike, you're...A WHOS AND THE WHAT NOW?"

Spike purred convincingly, though in his own mind was mildly disgusted with his own actions, at Twilight as he started strutting toward her with some kind of sadistic posturing.

"Oh...Twilight Twilight Twilight...you just don't know when to keep pony scum out of our bed...do you?"

Pinkie just stood there, fascinated by this really life-like interpretation of what the violet unicorn had just got done telling her. It was so surreal how Spike was sauntering up to his pony friend, grabbing her lightly, but with purpose, around the back of her neck and whispering into her ear as if the conversation they were having was reserved for their love nest alone. Twilight, on the other hoof, was freaking the fuck out!

"A...y...wh...SPIKE, WHAT IN HEAVEN'S NAME ARE YOU DOING?"

Spike's demeanor became increasingly pushy, impatient, and abrasive. He pinched her with the fleshy parts of his claws on her soft chest, not wanting to draw blood, but wanting to make it clear that he meant business.

"Don't be so innocent with me, My Little Pet! You know how badly you've been behaving lately, and once we get home, I'll make sure that you stay in your place this time!"

"Ow Spike! Why are you pinching me like that?"

Twilight thought SHE was the one who had gone off the deep end of the pool. Spike was really starting to scare her now, and it showed in the trembling, almost tear-filled eyes of the purple pony. The little lizard's own eyes burned through her retinas with a possessive, tawdry steam she had never seen before. He was internally suffering by doing this, but it was all just a part of the plan, and would be over eventually.

"Oh...yes...Twilight...when I look into your eyes, I know that I made the right choice in making you number one..."

The earth pony interjected, confused by the terminology.

"Number one?..."

Spike's focus was robbed from him for a minute as he turned his head toward the pink pony to listen to her question.

"What are you talking about Spike?"

Spike's brain could've exploded with the smorgasbord of fibs collecting in his head.

"Well...let's just put it this way Pinkie...you see, I've got plenty of babes around Equestria in my little group. Twilight, as the first mare I've really known, became my number one marefriend, the cream of the crop, the best of the bunch. Do you get it now?"

"Um...so what number am I in this?..."

Both Spike and Twilight were giving Pinkie a "I can't believe you just asked that!" look. Spike had some trouble adjusting to all of the questions bombarding him, as well as Twilight trying to get him off of her.

"Oh uh...you're up there somewhere really high, Pinkie, don't worry your pretty little head."

Pinkie wasn't satisfied with the evasive answer Spike had just given her.

"No no...I mean what number am I exactly Spike?"

If Spike wasn't preoccupied holding down Twilight in his grasp, he would've face-palmed himself in disbelief. Why was this so important to Pinkie Pie all of a sudden? What, did she WANT to be Spike's marefriend or something?

"OKAY, you're number three, after Rarity, if you're really that desperate to know!"

"THAT'S AWESOME!"

She was joking, right? Being a part of Spike's harem was perceived by any who heard Twilight's nasty stories as a deadly torture, a nightmare from which one could not wake! She must not have told Pinkie all of the gory details before he knocked on the door.

"Am I really that special to you Spike?"

Pinkie all but tore Spike off of Twilight, leaving her in a tired heap of confusion on the bakery floor, and grasping Spike lovingly in her front hooves. She gave a soulful look into Spike's eyes, one that unnerved him so much that his entire charade was about to crack under the pressure.

"Uh...well...uh...yes?..."

She cheered with delight at his confession.

"WHEEEEEEE!"

The miniscule dragon almost flew out of her hooves, and head-first into the ceiling, as she made a motion to launch him up into the air before stopping herself.

"Wait...I've gotta tell Rainbow Dash! She'll be sooooo jealous!"

Spike had no idea, as usual, what Pinkie Pie was rambling on about, but was just happy to see her leave the place to him and Twilight, taking the extreme amount of energy with her before somepony got seriously injured. She was as fast as lightning in her exit, and he could only guess that her enthusiasm was somehow genuine... Of course, now this left the two of them alone, where there would be no witnesses to Spike's beat-down at the hooves of the crazed Twilight.

"...SPIIIIKE!"

Twilight's eye twitched violently as she nastily glared at her dragon assistant.

"That was a bad move on your part! Where do you get off, fondling your own mentor? That's just freaky!"

Well, there was no turning back now, may as well lay into her with his best shots.

"Hey, come now, Twilight," he started ironically, "after all, you're the one who told everypony about me doing horrible things to you! Furthermore, it's not like you don't fantasize about touching the princess either!"

"That's completely different Spike! Celestia and I..."

"...are meant to be together! Yes, Twilight, I've already heard that line enough! You're really starting to scare me! If you're going to make me jump through hoops to keep you from regretting your actions, that's one thing, but it's getting out of hand! You've already gotten more than one pony into this mess with this unhealthy addiction!"

Twilight's horn started glowing threateningly, her ire rising every second.

"It's not an addiction, Spike! It's love, you got that? All you're doing is trying to ruin everything for me! You're just sour grapes because I've actually found my true love, while you're still chasing something that will never happen (Rarity)! Well, I've had it up to here with your nonsense, Spike, get out!"

Spike glanced around Sugarcube Corner with a nervous confusion in his voice.

"...Uh...you do realize that this isn't the library, right?"

The horn on Twilight's head was pulsing with that familiar energy, charging up in the heat of her anger. Spike stepped back a little as the rogue current sparked in front of his feet. He knew what he had to do...

"I said, get out, Spike! I don't want to see you right now!"

Spike took off as fast as he could for the door, but whether the shot was intentional or not, a beam of some kind of energy was nudged into his back forcefully, sending him through the opened door to the bakery, flying about six feet into the grassy, dirt covered streets of Ponyville. Spike was covered in dust, coughing a little as the wind had just been knocked out of him. He did everything he could to tell himself that she was just temperamental, and that in a few hours this wave of anger would eventually subside. She was usually very sweet, and kind, but this was a dark time for her, and he just had to be as patient as he could muster. Getting angry at her wouldn't help the situation, only by deterring her grand schemes and trying to show her the error of her ways would she pull through it.

Twilight would probably be in there for a while, wanting to avoid contact with the dragon as much as possible before she was ready to have it. Maybe that was for the best, as Spike knew that he wouldn't be able to get through to her at the moment. He picked himself up and decided that he would get those ingredients later, when nopony else was around. He started a sulking trek back over to the library, as he would still have to avoid some of their other friends. There was no way he would give up on his own strategies now, no matter how sorry he sometimes felt for the purple mare.

As he walked he started thinking about what Twilight had said in there, about how he's just jealous because Twilight has somepony, and Spike...what did Spike really have?... Of course, Spike didn't have the horrendous delusions going through his mind that the unicorn had. He was content, in most cases, with being Rarity's pincushion more so than her coltfriend. He knew she wasn't exactly smitten with the young whelp. He even enjoyed the challenge that dynamic created with them. Though, maybe in some remote bastion of his psyche, he secretly envied how determined and unmovable his purple friend was when it came to her own feelings.

The implications were discomforting, to say the least. Spike had always just assumed that everything he did for Twilight was for her own good, to the point that he had her every best interest at heart. Even in trying to help, it often occurred to him that selfish motives were never far behind. Fear of his own punishment was one of those, since if any connections were made to incriminate both Twilight and Spike, he would suffer the same grievous consequences. Also, if jealousy were added to that fairly short list of incentives, that would complicate things greatly in his attempt to prove that he was in the right here, instead of the wrong.

Though, to reiterate the point, Spike KNEW that Rarity wasn't gaga over him, and as much as he would like her to be more interested in him, he was still completely fine with that. That left him with an interesting proposition. If Twilight was in love with Princess Celestia, and Spike was jealous of them...then that could only mean that he was secretly, almost subconsciously, admiring one pony or the other. He guessed that maybe the attention Twilight showed him less when she went goofy over Celestia was one possible cause to that scenario, if Twilight were the object of his desire, completely unknown to his conscious self. He supposed he knew the princess well enough, and was appreciative enough of her ideal female pony form... Good gravy! Maybe the rumors spreading around Equestria like a virus were true... Maybe everypony, combined at the least, was in love with either one of the princesses, in his case, Celestia! His sources for that datum were probably pretty damn biased, as Snips and Snails were not the brightest, most studious unicorns in the world after all, but he had heard other ponies comment on the possibility as well... However, the scariest notion of them all coalesced into a wall of thorny vines, tearing away at his tender brain matter, he could be in love with both Twilight AND Princess Celestia!

"AAAAGH! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!" Spike tried to keep himself from imagining threesomes between him and his two older mare companions and teachers, but the chance thought-seed planted into his head took a horrible root, and attempted to wrap him into his own mind-fuck...

Twilight sat at one of the tables in Sugarcube Corner, pondering craftily over her latest tactics. She was incredibly shaken up from the sudden appearance of Spike, but she thought up another ruse to distract him with almost too easily. She had remembered that she had a comb still stashed away in her saddlebags, ones she thought earlier to be completely empty, save the umbrella hat she put away when the clouds started clearing up.

She had taken out the comb and sat comfortably in one of the seats. She began utilizing soft, deep strokes to pull out the kinks in her tail. Having ran around all day was not a great way for a tail and mane to stay untangled. Spreading rumors around town and using the power of suggestion to put Spike into a similar dementia state was...how could Twilight put it..."hairy"...work...(HAH!)

She grinned maniacally at her own pun, and the assurance that calling Spike "jealous of her and the princess" would put him into a mental tailspin of epic proportions. He was just so easy to manipulate, when the proper button sequence was decoded, and Twilight knew the ins and outs of his mind better than anypony else in Ponyville. She reasoned, somewhat soberly, that their relationship was both so cohesive and yet also so competitive because of their grasps on each others mindsets.

She really didn't like to mess with Spike so much, on most occasions, but with the princess only about two and a half days away from her waiting, wanton hooves, even Spike would get no special considerations for mercy! If he insisted on charging at her, time and time again, then she would not hesitate to slam the hammer down on him to teach him his place.

The dastardly mare stared lovingly at her own tail after her brushing, every strand of hair perfectly in its place. She may have booted him out of there with her magic, but it was the mind-magic of her words that would ultimately break the dragon's fighting spirit, once and for all...

"Oh Spike," the purple unicorn cooed as she caressed her tail, "you're my little pet now!"

UPDATED A/N MARCH 2012 - ...Yikes...I don't know about anyone else, but I just cringe every time I read this. Well, feel free to let me know what you thought about these "lost" chapters as compared to the new chapter 6 (which essentially covers about twice as much ground as these two did). Thanks, bye guys. 


	9. NewChapter 7

A/N - Here's (new) chapter 7, which comes directly after (new) chapter 6. It is substantially shorter than most of them have been, and yes, it is quite obvious that not a whole lot goes on here. I wanted to put this out now, as I've kind of hit a few-month-long plateau as far as how I want to handle the next part of this story. I would've waited until I had at least 5000 or more words, but I think I've made you guys wait long enough for something new. The next part may take a LONG time to get out because of this plateau. Otherwise, it's Spike's plans and Twilight gathering her friends for the confrontation to come. Sorry it's heavily rushed, but I wanted to speed it along as the next part will no doubt be fun for me to write. Thanks for the patience.

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><p>Reptilian eyes shot open as the first rays of the morning light reached through the curtains of the humble, wooden window. The same eyes took in the boring, brown ceiling, searching for visual clues as to the half-forgotten night before. Slowly, a build up of understanding and realization of those important events coagulated in the little head that housed them.<p>

"Uuuun...I wonder how long I've been out."

A ray of light momentarily blinded Spike as it crossed his vision path. From the looks of the sun outside, he could tell that he woke up pretty early in the morning, possibly even a tad earlier than both Twilight and him usually would.

"Mmm...good, I haven't slept in much."

The numbness in his arms and legs from Twilight's spell had worn off, as was evident from how his claws reflexively went to his face to hide from the rest of the sunlight. Before even attempting to stand up, he stretched his cramped legs, unused since the little bolt of magic drilled into his mind. Everything was in working order again, at least as it seemed. Now then, first thing's first...

"Twilight's gotta still be here, right?"

He wobbled up on his legs, arms flailing like windmills at a small loss of balance. As he composed himself, he shuffled over to the door of Twilight's new room. With claws and ear on the door, he made an auditory scan of the room for signs of sleeping breaths, a running shower, humming, anything really, just to confirm she was still there. However, the reply was silence, and this was very unnerving to the purple dragon.

"She must not be here right now. I don't hear anything going on downstairs either, not even a peep. She's definitely got the advantage on me when it comes to time."

Spike chewed on his nails forlornly, gaze settling on the steps to the lobby floor.

"I wonder..."

The fire breather ran down the stairs, not caring anymore as to his noise level. No one was there to hear him anyway. Looking around the war-torn primary room, Twilight having done a number on many wooden furniture pieces last night, Spike scanned fervently for a pen and paper, wanting to see if this "curse" the violet unicorn had put on him was real or not. A royal blue quill and fresh parchment rested on one of the only unscathed podiums, just begging to be written on.

"Oh boy, exactly what I was looking for!"

With a wide grin in his cheeks, the little dragon stepped closer to his prized destination, having gained a boost of confidence, though still wary of the possibility that Twilight wasn't bluffing. There they were, right in front of his grateful eyes. Just one note to Princess Celestia, and this whole matter would be ended in a heartbeat. He nervously picked up the pen and paper, finding that no ill effects had taken hold of his body.

"Phew...that was cl...!"

Tendrils of white, hot fire suddenly engulfed the two objects, connecting to the assistant's own claws, burning them in a seething bath of indescribable pain.

"Oh my...what the...!"

BOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Spike was blown back into a wall on the other side of the room with the explosive combustion. His appendages burnt for a while longer before returning to normal, albeit with some charred black stripes adorning them. The hurting Spike slowly picked himself back up from the near crater he made in the library wall.

"Ooh...ack...answers that question now, doesn't it?" He blew on the claws in a bid to cool them off, and held his aching upper back as well as he could after the traumatic blow.

The severity of his situation continued to pour through his brain as he heard a few short, frantic knocks on the door to the outside.

"Could that be Twilight? Oh sweet Royal Sisters I hope not..."

Spike tentatively opened the door, fearing the pony or ponies on the other side. He blew an "o" of relieved air as the two pegasi that had knocked on the door were none other than Fluttershy, and a nice surprise, Rainbow Dash as well.

"Oh Spike, I came as soon as I could," Fluttershy was glad to see Spike more or less unharmed, though he looked disheveled and half-awake. Rainbow Dash flew casually into the tree-house while the yellow pegasus noticed the burn marks on Spike's hands.

"What did Twilight do to you last night, Spike?"

"Oh, it's really good to see you, Fluttershy," Spike was genuinely pleased, as he felt like it was the best time for them to plan on their attack, "Don't worry about the burn marks, Twilight's just trying to keep me from picking up pens and paper today, considering what we found out yesterday."

Fluttershy eyed the small purple lizard, concerned by what he said, "...What did you two find out yesterday, Spike?..."

Spike rubbed his hands on his face tiredly, trying to wake up further and explain everything clearly.

"Princess Celestia sent us another message last night. She couldn't make it to the presentation tomorrow because of some "other business" she has to attend to."

Fluttershy's countenance uplifted as the obviously good news was relayed to her, "That's wonderful Spike! It takes care of everything now, right?"

"Please Fluttershy, let me finish." Spike made a serious face, beyond the point of fooling around, "So, the princess told us that she will be coming to the presentation a day early...more specifically, she's going to be here TONIGHT!"

The shy pegasus squeaked in shock, not taking to the development as cheerfully anymore. "I...I really hope...you're ready today, Spike! That doesn't sound like it's going to be enough time to do much at all."

Spike felt horrible, his head bowing in shame.

"I'm sorry, Fluttershy...but I'm not ready! I couldn't get the recipe finished, I hardly even thought much about how I was going to get her away from here. I was under the assumption that I'd have another day."

Both the yellow pony and Rainbow Dash, having been distracted slightly by the indent in one of the library walls, showed defeated looks at Spike's admittance.

"...B...But..." the dragon tried to cheer them up again, not wanting despair to overtake them just yet, "...I've been having some ideas about what we could do instead."

Rainbow Dash jumped into the conversation finally, though kind of cutting Spike off in the middle of a thought, "What about sending a letter to the princess? That should be the pretty obvious thing to do, right?"

"Well...if I could, that would've solved the entire problem, but right now..."

Spike pointed Dash over to the podium he had just been knocked away from, gingerly touching the quill and paper, eliciting electric shocks and more claw pains from them. Dash's eyes went wide in surprise, noticing that this would certainly impede Twilight's assistant from penning any letters to her mentor. As Spike cooled his hands down yet again, he regarded Dash with a confused smile.

"So Rainbow Dash...did you end up believing me after you talked to Fluttershy?"

Dash moved her forelegs against each other in thought.

"Um...I don't really know what to think, but if Fluttershy says that you aren't crazy, and that Twilight really has been acting weird, and put that spell you have on your claws, then that's good enough for me right now."

The slightly conflicted pony gave him a determined face, pledging her support with a tap of her hoof to the wooden floorboards.

"Thanks Dash, you'll definitely be a big help soon," Spike wearily gestured to her.

"Big help?" Dash's lips scrunched up in confusion, "What are you talking about, Spike?"

The dragon had been going over some scenarios in his dreams, none of which really seemed like they would work out too well for them. Then again, he tried to piece together some of them into new plans, and he was hoping that the two would agree to assist him with this.

"Fluttershy, Dash," he started, taking in a deep breath for a long talk, "the only thing we really need to make sure of today, disregarding anything else, is that Twilight and Princess Celestia cannot meet each other under any circumstances."

He went over to the yellow pegasus not but a foot away, "Fluttershy, did Twilight tell you anything last night that might be of some use to us today?"

Fluttershy immediately perked back up again, "Oh, yes, that's why we came over here today, to warn you, Spike. Twilight told me that she's going to gather up Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and both Rainbow Dash and I to confront you about your problems with Twilight and her "coltfriend". They're going to try to bring you over to my cottage and tie you down so that you'll be as far away from the library as possible when the princess arrives. I just saw her a little while ago, heading out to Sweet Apple Acres. I think she was alone, so we've still got some time, but not much."

Spike gathered every little detail he could from what she had just told him, going over various possibilities.

"I see, well, that's good actually. I figured that something like that was going on, since she was recruiting you guys. I had a similar plan to what Twilight was thinking, except instead of me being trapped at your place, we'd make it so that she would be instead."

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy nodded in understanding. Spike wanted to turn the tables on her, so to speak.

"Fluttershy?" Spike asked in an authoritative way.

"Yes, Spike?"

"If you could, I'd like you to go back to the cottage for now, and wait for me to meet you over there. Don't let Twilight find you there though, try to find someplace to hide from her so that you won't have to go with them."

The shy pony thought it over, not completely following him at this point.

"Why would you want me to meet you at my house though? If Twilight thinks I'm abandoning her, she'll know what's going on, and might even come looking for you."

"Trust me, Fluttershy, I know Twilight, she'll just think you didn't want to come because things might get too violent. I wouldn't ask any other pony to do this if I knew it would be suspicious."

"Oh...well alright, that sounds fine then." Fluttershy didn't like the thought that things might get out of hand between everypony, but acquiesced to Spike's request despite it.

"While I'm here at the library, before I meet up with you, I'm going to do a few things to the other girls I might regret later, but it'll be a good cover. Since they're all expecting me to deny what they say I'm doing, I'm going to disorient them by playing the very part that Twilight has told them I've been. When they try to catch me, I'll jump out the window and run to your place, Fluttershy. This is where you, Rainbow Dash, come in."

"Me?" Dash was, once again, only half listening to the long list of things Spike wanted Fluttershy to remember.

"Yes, since you can fly back to your cloud home faster than anypony I know, I want you to go there now, but let Twilight recruit you into coming here. Just show some offense to the things I say to you or any of the others, and after I run out the window, I want you to distract them for a while. Since you can see further because you can fly, tell them I'm going in the direction of your house, and have them search the place as long as you can, since they'll check everywhere else after that, and Fluttershy's cottage will probably be one of those places."

"Sounds pretty simple, you've got it, Spike!"

Spike turned back over to Fluttershy, "Now then, Fluttershy, I'm going to have to use your kitchen to whip up something fast for tonight's presentation. Hopefully, I can get it done before Twilight tries to knock your door down."

Fluttershy cringed a little in fright. It seemed as if Spike was asking her to take one for the team and possibly get roughhoused.

"No no," Spike comforted her quickly, "She doesn't want anypony to know about her "instability", so not only will she come back alone, but I'm sure she won't outright maim you or anything..."

Spike mumbled to himself apprehensively, "...unless she thinks you already know..."

Luckily, Fluttershy didn't hear that addition, watching Spike intently to make sure she had everything straight.

"Ahem," he cleared his throat a little, "Do you still have that bear cage down in your basement, Fluttershy?"

The animal lover thought for a few moments, "Yes, I do, but I usually only keep it around now for storing personal things."

"That's all I needed to know. We're going to get Twilight to chase us down the stairs and trap her in that. Then, I'll rush back over to the library, get everything prepared, the princess will come and I'll tell her Twilight's sick and I'll be doing the presentation in her place, she'll be thrilled with it, all's well that ends well!"

Rainbow Dash asked one more question to solidify the plan in her head, "Then we figure out how to deal with Twilight, right?"

"Right!"

The three of them took another collective breath, hoping for everything to turn out well, and for nopony to get too physically injured. Spike spoke up first again after a few seconds of working the details out.

"Alright, let's get to it! I've got to get to work, making everything perfect when the others come to get me."

They broke ranks, Fluttershy heading back to her home as did Rainbow Dash, waving to each other one last time before they followed through with what they were doing. Spike was left in the library alone once again, musing to himself.

"Oh Celestia, I hope this works..."

* * *

><p>The plan was only too perfect in the mind of the crazed violet unicorn. It had taken most of the morning, into the early afternoon, to gather up Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash for the little...pow-wow they would be partaking in at the library, but it had been so worth it.<p>

There were only two minor details that put her off, making her stray a bit from the picture-perfect image in her head, and giving her a small dose of uneasiness at the outcome of the intervention. One had to do with Rainbow Dash. Twilight thought on it:

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

Twilight, along with her other three friends accompanying her, stood patiently at the doorstep of Rainbow Dash's cloud home, Twilight providing the spell for cloud-walking, of course.

"Who is it?" A female voice inside indicated that the rainbow-maned pony was at home, but she sounded just a hair jumpy.

"It's me, Twilight, and I brought everypony else along with me! I know Pinkie Pie spoke to you about Spike's problems, and that's why I'm here."

"Oh...I'll be right out!"

The other three tag-alongs eyed each other, apprehensive to have to confront a good friend who would no doubt be angry with them when he realized what they were at the library for. They wondered amongst themselves how anyone so little, cute, and harmless had been a terror under their noses the entire time. Though, if Twilight was telling the truth, then this whole situation was for his own good. Within a minute or so, Rainbow Dash made her presence known with a click of her door swinging open.

From Dash's point of view, the whole crew looked sort of menacing, in a rag-tag, bunch of vigilantes fashion. Applejack had a cowpony rope around her midsection, the intended purpose not lost on her. Rarity looked like she hadn't slept all night, and for good reason. She was probably closer to Spike than the rest of them were, given his huge crush on the stylish mare, and Twilight had thoroughly destroyed any innocence Rarity had concerning her little purple dragon. Pinkie Pie, well, was optimistic as ever, her brightly shining blue eyes and insane grin a testament to her never-ending belief that anypony can be reformed from their grouchy, grumpy, or in this case psychotic ways.

"Heeeeeey guys! Let's go over there and show that scaly slime-bucket what's what." She hoped in vain that she looked as ready to go as she thought she sounded. Twilight could smell her reluctance from a mile away.

"Um...Dash, are you alright today? You don't look very ready to do a whole lot."

Part of her problem was that she hadn't seen Twilight for the better part of three days. Did she always look so...haggard, unbalanced, or in Rainbow Dash terms...whacked out? Those pupils of hers were far too small for how Dash remembered her meek, scholarly friend. Her mane was unkempt, a crime against organization that Twilight never committed, unless she was going through one of...those fazes again.

"Who, me?" Rainbow squeaked, now convinced beyond a doubt that Spike was not full of it when he said she was exhibiting odd behaviors and dragging everypony else into her mad house, "I'm always ready for everything!"

Just to ensure them she was legit, she skyrocketed into the air with a flap of her wings, putting on an enthusiastic mug. "See?"

Twilight's face scrunched quietly in confusion. Rainbow was acting shady, she just knew it. It wasn't like her to look nervous about something like this, unless she was truly afraid of Spike, another absurd notion. Then again, she didn't have all day to worry about those schematics. She needed to talk to Fluttershy last, and Rainbow Dash was coming with them, which was all that mattered.

"Ooookay then, Rainbow Dash. I'm certainly glad that you want to assist me, you're a good friend."

The blue pegasus rubbed the back of her head with a hoof, floating down to the cloud with a large hay-eating grin.

"Yeah...that's me! A good friend..."

The other reason Twilight was apprehensive about the whole thing was because Fluttershy, despite her declaration to back up Twilight and help with the preparations for Spike's stay, was nowhere to be found in her own cottage at the time. She scraped her scalp with a purple hoof, recalling the scene:

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

"Fluttershy?" Twilight had yelled through the door of the shy yellow pony's domicile.

Silence...

"Hmm...have any of you talked to Fluttershy today? I thought she'd be home to greet us after I gave her the information last night."

"Haven't seen her all day!" Pinkie Pie was still bouncing energetically, ready to help the purple dragon out in any way that she could.

"Nor I, my dear," Rarity muttered, indirectly apologizing for not knowing.

Applejack quietly mused, still feeling a little guilty about what they were about to do, "Nope...I haven't."

"..." Twilight turned to Rainbow Dash, who was, once again, a little too quiet for the unicorn's taste.

"Have YOU talked to Fluttershy at all lately, Dash?"

"Nuh uh." Dash quickly shook her head.

"...Are you sure?..."

"Yep..."

Rainbow Dash made a strained smile, nodding rapidly, trying to look apologetic as well, but coming off more as suspicious. Twilight raised a brow at her clammy friend.

"Alright, if you say so..."

The blue pony pointed a hoof toward the door as a way to loosen the tension directed at her.

"Hey guys, why don't we check the cottage to see if she's hiding somewhere?"

Dash all but barged in, leaving a rainbow trail in her wake. The four ponies were a little uncomfortable invading Fluttershy's privacy like this, well...other than Twilight who would have turned over the whole place hunting her down had the others not been there, but they decided it could be worth a look. All four of the ponies shuffled into the building quietly, not wanting to disturb any animals that may happen to be asleep or resting peacefully.

"Oh, pony feathers!" Rainbow Dash thought to herself as she registered what she had done, "I hope Fluttershy hid REALLY well, 'cause they're going to search everywhere."

Before anypony could comment on her inactivity, she made herself look busy trying to locate the elusive caregiver. She noticed Rarity was heading into the kitchen and Pinkie took the upstairs bedroom. Applejack paired up with Rainbow to check around the living room, or more like do all the work while Rainbow Dash just hoped no one would find Fluttershy.

"Heh heh," the blue pony chuckled nervously after the three of them had given up, "doesn't look like anypony's here..."

"Wait a minute!"

Oh no, that sounded like Twilight! They turned to find her standing in front of the door to Fluttershy's basement, incredulously eying the door knob as she tried to open it.

"This door is locked!..."

A fearful gulp silently went down Dash's throat as Twilight had possibly found a clue to locating the shy pegasus. She waited expectantly for Twilight to make a move, say something else, or unlock the door with her magic.

"...Oh wait, I forgot that she always keeps this door locked!" Twilight exclaimed in humor, chiding herself for being so forgetful.

Dash was beyond relieved as the unicorn trotted back over to the group, giving them all puzzled looks.

"So, did anypony find out where she is or may have went?"

"Not a clue, Twi," Applejack spoke up first, "She must'a left for some food for her critters or something."

"I didn't find anything at all in the kitchen," Rarity jumped in, "though I must say, her kitchen is sparkling clean, like she just tidied up this morning, so she must not have gone far."

Pinkie Pie scratched her shoulder, confused by the entire mess, "Yeah, I didn't see her up in her bedroom either. I wonder where she could've gone..."

Dash noticed, out of the corner of her vision, that Twilight's eye twitched just slightly. She might have thought nothing of it at first, but given that she knew how Twilight had planned this thing out so thoroughly, it was clear she was upset, and in no small way.

"Well..." Twilight huffed in disappointment, "we'll just have to continue this little intervention without her. She probably just got scared by what I told her and doesn't want to get too heavily involved. A shame too, because Fluttershy is so adept at helping ponies with their problems."

While the four other ponies slid out of the cottage without making too much noise, Rainbow Dash waited behind to vent the held breath she had stored for the last five minutes. Looked like nopony was going to see Fluttershy today except for Spike and her, and that was definitely a good thing. Dash wondered where she had hidden herself, not taking the easily excitable pony as particularly stealthy. Either way, it worked in their favor here, so she wasn't complaining. She flew outside to meet the others after slowly pulling the door shut.

Little did they know, the door that Fluttershy always keeps locked had been so for another reason. The knob slowly turned and the door creaked open when she was sure no one else had strayed back from the little pony-hunt group.

"Phew...that was close," Fluttershy was sweating from both the fear of being caught and the fact that it was quite hot down there without air flow, "now I guess I just have to wait for Spike then."

As her thoughts on the two incidents ended, Twilight looked her friends over. She didn't blame them for being unwilling to a certain extent. The fear of what Spike might possibly say or do and having to subdue him if he got violent or uppity didn't sit well with any of them, present company excluded obviously.

"Alright," she took a deep breath as they stood in front of the Ponyville Library, ready to impart "justice" on the little dragon, "Applejack, you've got your lasso right?"

"Right here, Twilight," she replied with a head motion to her midsection.

"Good, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, are all of you ready to do what it takes in the event that things get ugly?"

"If it'll help Spike get the treatment and care he needs to get better, then I'm all in!" Rarity put on a determined face, just wanting her Spikey Wikey back to normal again.

"I'm with Rarity on that one!" Pinkie Pie, with her wellspring of hope, cheered.

"Yeah...uh...bring'em on!..." Rainbow Dash threw a hoof around her other side in a ready-to-go gesture, giving her two cents in order to blend in with them.

"Okay then," Twilight started up, "remember, he'll probably lie about everything, so we've got to stay alert, and keep him from making us let our guards down. This is not only for what he's done to my coltfriend and me, but also for him, so that he can learn to control himself, and live here in Ponyville peacefully without hurting others."

On the outside, the demented pony put on an air of sorrow and resolve. On the inside, she was brimming with nasty delight. Spike wouldn't keep her away from the lovely Celestia anymore after this! She would've laughed evilly, as any villain they had fought off would, she really wanted to. However, she quelled the urge inside her, needing to focus more on the task at hoof. Then, with him out of the picture, she could seduce the princess with all the things she had been studying while she knew Spike was asleep or out on an errand.

"Okay, I'll go in first, and you guys just wait for a few minutes while I bring the topic up. I'll give you the signal to come in and start the intervention."

They all nodded in understanding of the plan. Twilight sucked in a deep breath, ready to tackle the situation head on. She opened the library door gingerly and stepped inside...


End file.
